Divorce

[Rainbow988]

Mums who left the martial house did you do it when your husband was home or out and if you did it whilst he was home did he try stopping you from leaving

Tried many discussions and couple's counselling first so it wasn't out of the blue then put it in writing in an email. It sounds like you might not feel able to discuss this safely in which case leave first and get to a safe place. You have to prioritize your safely it can be a dangerous time. Good luck.

Yabu.

When I left DP (not married but had 2 DC, then age 5 and 2) it was clear the relationship was long over, in separate rooms and barely communicating, apart from the kids. I was still dreading telling him I was going. I’d already signed the house to him (was little equity, though I could have taken 40% of the deposit he paid and the 60k he paid off the mortgage in the 5yrs we had lived there but didn’t).

When I told him I had found a rental and was moving in the following week he was quite upset. He said that although it might not appear it (as relationship totally broken down by that point) he was sad that our relationship didn’t work out. I didn’t say much, but was massively relieved it was done. In the end I moved fairly quickly as we had an argument over the signing the house and so the kids and I moved into the new place a couple of days later (i’d already been moving stuff without him knowing).

15yrs later, we have co-parented really well, people often comment how nice it is we can go on days out and in the past holidays together.