Taking toddler DD out durring week days

[Rhudson1992]

AIBU to take my daughter who hasn't started school yet out to day time activites while her middle school age stepbrother is at school?
My husband sees it as favoritism because before we met he had his son in preschool and didn't take him out on weekdays. I see it as she's only little once and I don't think the way his son was raised should have an impact on the way I'm raising my daughter. I've also had the thought that he got to be the only one for more than 10 years and it can be her turn to be special for a little while.

Of course it's fine.

Your husband is insane if he thinks you have to parent your daughter the way he parented his son before you met. If he wanted to take his son out during the day he could have!

what a strange husband

Of course it’s fine! How bizarre. DD1 is at school, DD2 is at home with me three days a week, are we meant to just sit inside for three days? We go out to stuff every day!

Obviously you are not being unreasonable take her out! But it concerns me that he is comparing the children?! Does he do this in other aspects too??

Really strange of your dh, what does he expect you two to do all day?
I take my little one out all the time but things I know my older one would enjoy- farm park, bowling etc I leave till weekends so we can do it as a family.

You mean you have a pre school aged daughter that you take out during the day (the park, soft play etc presumably). But your DH objects because he and his ex-wife didn't do the same because they chose to put their son in nursery. Is he saying your DD should be in nursery. Does he think that would be beneficial for the child or maybe he's suggesting you get a job?

So you should be confined to the house? How weird. Presumably his son had fun and did loads of activities at preschool. Why should you and your child be punished for their decisions? Take your kid out!

Your husband has a screw loose. Does he want to have DD in nursery FT and pay all those fees just because DS went full time, even if it isn’t needed for childcare purposes? Or does he just expect you both to not leave the house? Or is he hinting he thinks you should go back to work because that isn’t the right way to start that conversation? I’m so confused.

Your husband is absolutely bonkers.

Does he think when a “normal” family has an older child at school and then they have a new baby that child gets locked in the house until they start school?

Don’t let this idiot of a man control you or your child.

She is only 2, and we both agreed it would be best for her if I were to stay at home with her. DSS is voicing his jealousy that he dosnt get to do "fun things" because he is at school and husband has made that mine and my daughters problem.

Next time it’s the school holidays I’d drag DSS with you to rhyme time, sing and sign, the church playgroup -the babiest activities you can possibly think of- and I bet he’d stop complaining pretty sharpish about missing out on the fun! Solving your DH problem isn’t quite so easy though…

Does your step son live with you?
If so, surely you do stuff with both of them during the holidays?
What you do with your DD during term time is of no concern if him or your DH.

Seriously?

Does he want his daughter to have to stay in all week? That would be awful for her development. Of course you can continue to take her out, that’s being a good parent.

He's being weird, of course its fine to go out and do stuff during the week. The only way this wouldn't be fair is if DS hadn't started school yet either and you left him at home whilst you went out which obviously isnt the case!

One of the most bizarre things I have ever read!

Of course you should do those lovely things with your daughter. Perhaps your husband can redress the balance a bit by carving out some son time on the weekends and taking DSS to something that it's purely for him? My 3 all had that time with me but then felt some jealousy anyway. That's normal!

Start looking to get a job again even if it’s part time and continue to take your daughter out and about. This controlling behaviour may well lead to you needing to separate so make sure you can live independently.

Why does your stepson know what you are doing during the day when he is at school? It’s none of his business. I assume you’re going to the park, soft play, a library, perhaps a cake and coffee and not Harry Potter World every day?

Fml! Your husband is a knob.

Eh?! That's like me staying at home all the time during mat leave while my oldest is in school, for fear of upsetting him! How would he (step son) even know what you're up to during the day, your DH is being massively unreasonable.

So many questions. Firstly, doesn't your DH do any activities with his son and don't you ever do anything with him as a family (school holidays, weekends)? If not, why not? Secondly, how does DSS know what you're doing with your daughter whilst he's at school? Thirdly, does a boy of that age seriously want to tag along with a 2 year old girl and his stepmum? Finally, this is all exceptionally weird. If your DH wanted you to stay at home, what does he suggest you do all day. Does he honestly expect you to never go to the park or whatever? Sorry but I think there might be more to this.

If he didn't take his son out when he was little that was on him. Of course you need to take DD out. It's stimulating for her, and you'll both be bored as hell sat at home.

He’s being a dick.

Enjoy your time with your daughter.

This is insane. Your dh is being ridiculous and completely unreasonable. You already know this.

Please take your dd out and enjoy your time together. You don’t get this time back.