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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

16 Month old signs of autism?

30 replies

bravenewworld12 · 31/05/2025 18:58

I have a 16 month old, he will be 17 months in just over a week. He is a very active and curious little boy. Let's start with what he can do. He walked quite early and is now practically running. He loves to climb. He is generally happy and smiley. Nothing seems to phase him, he has no issues in busy parks, soft play, toddler groups etc he gets stuck right in and tries to join in with the big kids.
He babbles a little bit, and shouts/makes noises when he's excited. He will look at me if I call his name 90% of the time, lots of eye contact. He engages very much with me and my husband. He will constantly bring me toys to turn on, books to read, balls to throw etc throughout the day. He will hand lead if he wants something, put his arms up to be picked up if you say "up". He will grab your hand to point to something in a book. He loves to play peekaboo and will cover his head with the blanket. He will clap his hands if we sing if your happy and you know it most of the time but he's only just now started to do this very recently. He will bring me his shoes if he wants to go outside. He's recently started playing with toys in a more proper way like moving the cars back and forth and trying to put the animals in the correct place etc. We have a little play kitchen in the garden and he will pretend to have a drink with the little cup.

But compared to his peers of similar age I'm starting to worry he is falling behind his peers with his understanding and communication.

He doesn't say any words. No mama, no dada. Nothing. Sometimes it sounds like hes close but it's just babble, and not massive amounts of babble either. Lot's of grunts though.

No pointing with his index finger. If he wants something he will put his whole hand out and grunt and then get frustrated and whine. When I point at something I'm not really certain he's looking where I'm pointing as it's hard to tell especially if it's something far away.

No other gestures like waving hello or goodbye. No blowing kisses. (To be fair we don't do these with him every day, so he hasn't had a lot of practice with these, unlike clapping which I tried really hard with to get him to do before he eventually did it.)

I am trying really hard to work on body parts and we've had some success with him touching his nose but he's not really interested in sitting still for long. He will listen to me sing for a bit but gets bored.

If I say wheres the cat, or bring me your ball he doesn't really understand yet without visual clues.

He sometimes (maybe a few times a week) spins around till he gets dizzy. He also shuts his eyes for a few seconds sometimes and then opens them again. A bit like hes hiding from us.

He gets frustrated easily and has started having tantrums when he doesn't get his own way. He will wave his arms and hit me and also bang his head against something if hes having a tantrum. I know all toddlers have tantrums but I've mentioned it as it's part of the bigger picture.

I guess I'm looking for reassurance. I did call my health visitor and she said if at 20 months I still felt the same she would come out and do an assessment. So he's a little bit off that yet. I'd be willing to look at private SALT assessment but I'd probably want to wait until 18 months.

OP posts:
Dramatic · 14/07/2025 20:17

He could well have something like glue ear, or he might even need glasses (my niece is very long sighted and had some similar behaviours until she got glasses at 3) there are lots of things that don't point to autism like the eye contact, playing with you and wanting to engage you etc.

My best friends daughter is the same age and has suspected autism, she doesn't make any eye contact at all, doesn't walk, babble, play with toys, makes no attempt to engage with anyone. I know she may be on the more severe end but your boy sounds like he's doing quite well with milestones.

Holdontohope11 · 08/03/2026 10:58

bravenewworld12 · 31/05/2025 18:58

I have a 16 month old, he will be 17 months in just over a week. He is a very active and curious little boy. Let's start with what he can do. He walked quite early and is now practically running. He loves to climb. He is generally happy and smiley. Nothing seems to phase him, he has no issues in busy parks, soft play, toddler groups etc he gets stuck right in and tries to join in with the big kids.
He babbles a little bit, and shouts/makes noises when he's excited. He will look at me if I call his name 90% of the time, lots of eye contact. He engages very much with me and my husband. He will constantly bring me toys to turn on, books to read, balls to throw etc throughout the day. He will hand lead if he wants something, put his arms up to be picked up if you say "up". He will grab your hand to point to something in a book. He loves to play peekaboo and will cover his head with the blanket. He will clap his hands if we sing if your happy and you know it most of the time but he's only just now started to do this very recently. He will bring me his shoes if he wants to go outside. He's recently started playing with toys in a more proper way like moving the cars back and forth and trying to put the animals in the correct place etc. We have a little play kitchen in the garden and he will pretend to have a drink with the little cup.

But compared to his peers of similar age I'm starting to worry he is falling behind his peers with his understanding and communication.

He doesn't say any words. No mama, no dada. Nothing. Sometimes it sounds like hes close but it's just babble, and not massive amounts of babble either. Lot's of grunts though.

No pointing with his index finger. If he wants something he will put his whole hand out and grunt and then get frustrated and whine. When I point at something I'm not really certain he's looking where I'm pointing as it's hard to tell especially if it's something far away.

No other gestures like waving hello or goodbye. No blowing kisses. (To be fair we don't do these with him every day, so he hasn't had a lot of practice with these, unlike clapping which I tried really hard with to get him to do before he eventually did it.)

I am trying really hard to work on body parts and we've had some success with him touching his nose but he's not really interested in sitting still for long. He will listen to me sing for a bit but gets bored.

If I say wheres the cat, or bring me your ball he doesn't really understand yet without visual clues.

He sometimes (maybe a few times a week) spins around till he gets dizzy. He also shuts his eyes for a few seconds sometimes and then opens them again. A bit like hes hiding from us.

He gets frustrated easily and has started having tantrums when he doesn't get his own way. He will wave his arms and hit me and also bang his head against something if hes having a tantrum. I know all toddlers have tantrums but I've mentioned it as it's part of the bigger picture.

I guess I'm looking for reassurance. I did call my health visitor and she said if at 20 months I still felt the same she would come out and do an assessment. So he's a little bit off that yet. I'd be willing to look at private SALT assessment but I'd probably want to wait until 18 months.

Hello I’m in a very similar position with my daughter, thank you for sharing, like you I feel very overwhelmed, I just wondered how things are going?

bravenewworld12 · 08/03/2026 20:08

Holdontohope11 · 08/03/2026 10:58

Hello I’m in a very similar position with my daughter, thank you for sharing, like you I feel very overwhelmed, I just wondered how things are going?

My son is 26 months now. He can now point, wave, clap, blow kisses, point to body parts, follow 2 step instructions. His speech is still behind as he only has about 15 approximations of words/animal noises so hes on the wait list for SALT, but I am less worried about it now because his communication and understanding has come on leaps and bounds. I am hoping in the next 6 months his speech will explode.

OP posts:
tutugogo · 08/03/2026 20:17

@bravenewworld12 At 26 months my dd2 had no speech, it started about 2.5 and exploded just before 3, no disabilities as an adult. Her sister (autistic) was just shy of 4 getting speech, mine just weren’t talkers!

Holdontohope11 · 20/03/2026 14:19

bravenewworld12 · 08/03/2026 20:08

My son is 26 months now. He can now point, wave, clap, blow kisses, point to body parts, follow 2 step instructions. His speech is still behind as he only has about 15 approximations of words/animal noises so hes on the wait list for SALT, but I am less worried about it now because his communication and understanding has come on leaps and bounds. I am hoping in the next 6 months his speech will explode.

Thank you so much for responding, it sounds like your son has made brilliant progress

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