To ask if anyone enjoyed growing up rurally?

[YellowRedwheels1]

I’ve been on MN long enough to know that all the threads about rural living mention how bad it is for teens and how they themselves really resented it etc.

However, I feel like myself and some of my friends must be anomalies then as I absolutely loved it and wouldn’t have wanted to have lived in a town or city.

I guess I’m worried as DC is 6 and currently loves the fact we live rurally, have a big garden for her to charge about in , she horse rides just down the road etc but I’m waiting for the inevitable resentment when she gets to her teenage years and for her to hate the countryside and spend all her adult life living in towns and cities due to being scarred from her time in the countryside!!

I never felt this way though, to be fair we did have a bus service in my village growing up, only 4 a day, one in the morning, one at lunchtime and then coming back one in morning one in evening to the nearest town and city so I wasn’t completely cut off in my teenage years.

Myself and my friends were involved in the YFC, rode horses etc and even now, a lot of them work in agriculture or live rurally. We just weren’t bothered by living in the countryside and it was almost a way of life for us?

These people all have normal jobs in the local towns and cities now that they commute for or a lot WFH, there’s a couple of drs who moved back and work at the local hospital, one is a university lecturer and again, works at the local university. Another a nurse, project manager in tech etc so it’s not like we’re all a load of unskilled/ qualified country bumpkins.

You just don’t ever see this side on MN, it’s nearly always how bad it is for teens and how living rurally is bad for them/ isolating.

Is there anyone else on here who grew up living rurally and enjoyed it?

Rural ‘with a pub’ is very different to actual rural. I grew up where it was the only house and no pub, church or anything. My parents were happy to drive but it’s very different to living more urban where kids can be spontaneous and meet up whenever they want rather than waiting for parents to be free to drive. It’s very isolating as a child and awful for teenagers.

We live in a remote part of Scotland. There's a bus in the next town but it's a 2 hour walk away. Pros: idyllic childhood when they were young, swimming in river close by, lots of animals, lots of freedom to play outside, nearest road 2 miles away. Cons only really as they got older in terms of lifts: one son very social so lots of driving for him. Fair amount of being snow bound in the winter. Having to drive rubbish to nearest road on bin day (that's fun with 3 young lads when you have to get them all up at 0530 because it has to be on the kerb by 0600 and they are too little to leave alone). Wouldn't change it due the world though.

Do NOT get me started on quads without roll bars or helmets!

I was brought up on farm in a rural village (parish, rather than village). There are aspects of the life that I really enjoyed, and retrospectively, that I would have liked for my own children when they were younger.

For example, there were acres of land to explore with my brother and sister, trees to climb, games to play which were wildly imaginative. We cycled down windy country lanes, tamed pigeons and hens, took part in the farming life (hoed beet, picked potatoes, fed the pet lambs, drove the cattle and sheep etc.)

Yet, I do remember feeling isolated, and our family was living in poverty by today's standards. There was no heating in any of the bedrooms. We slept in outdoor clothes. There were leaks in the roof of the old farmhouse. We could never afford a holiday, and even if we could, my parents could not leave the farm. There was no public transport for miles, so if you could not drive, you were stuck. I remember wet, muddy days, in damp, muddy clothes, squatting by a smoking fire that struggled to burn, wishing I was somewhere, anywhere, else but there.

So, in my opinion, the rural life can be great if you have the money and resources to make it work. Unfortunately, rural poverty and isolation is still part of the countryside scene

My husband grow up in the country and loved it ..lots of space to play. I grow up half rural and honestly never felt I lacked being in the town. I never understood nightclubs anyway...it's dark, noisy and you can hear what anyone is saying. I went once or twice and decided prefer the country. Maybe children are different now

This sounds like a life I would LOVE

It was fab until I was a teen. Even then we had horses & dirt bikes & freedom. I couldn't comprehend when staying at my town friend's and us getting strict rules on walking to the shop 200m down the road.

BUT it was socially difficult. I couldn't participate in anything in town, do extra curricular activities etc. and I remember, even when I had my licence, the group saying we'd go swimming & all pop home for swimmers. It'd take an hour round trip so I couldn't go. I was often left out.

I moved into town asap. I hate most aspects of it & close neighbours & the lack of freedom for DC, but the proximity to their activities, friends, and supermarkets is worth it.

I grew up rurally and feel that I missed out on a lot in terms of my choices of hobbies, clubs, part time jobs etc. I was also pretty much dependent on being given lifts by my parents as the buses were few and far between, last bus at 5pm, and no buses on Sundays. I felt trapped tbh.

I left at 18 to go to university (in a big city) and only returned to visit. After university a lot of my friends went back to their parents houses but I didn't as I knew I would be severely limited in terms of employment prospects.

It was very much the life that my parents wanted and they still bang on about how wonderful my childhood was, I disagree.

DS would cycle to his friends’ houses. They would camp out ,camp out in friends gardens. Didn’t go into town 10 miles away much until old enough to drive.
V happy.

I grew up rurally. Absolutely loved it. Still love it. Kids (4) also love it. When small , they went to the village primary and had all their friends in walking distance. We are on the edge of a village and teens were able to walk/cycle into the village.

The game changer was teaching them all to drive as soon as they were 17. Double lesson for birthday and then whenever DH or I went out - they drove for practice. All worked part time from 14 years old and knew they needed to save for a car. Which proved useful even when they were at Uni. 2 live close by, 1 in London who ‘needs a green fix’ a minimum of twice a month. and one rurally in the West Country. The nearby dc are in planning for the local council and a lawyer who WFH .

Absolutely hated it. Family moved to the countryside when I was 9 and spent the next nine years bored out of my skull and counting down the days until I could live in a city again.

I wasn't an outdoorsy child and I didn't want to be "in nature", I wanted to be among cool arty people surrounded by cutting-edge culture and the feeling that all life was around me. Instead as a mixed-race girl in the '90s I was surrounded by insular curtain-twitchers who called me racial epithets and had no interest in anything outside their corner of the county. Obviously left as soon as humanly possible and never looked back. Wouldn't even visit that place again.

I must admit that as I've got older I have learned to appreciate nature and green spaces more - Hampstead Heath and Richmond Park obviously.

We live in a Naice village.

90% of residents grew up there. Went to school there. Never left. Now teach at the village school. Their kids will do the same (you can tell). Married someone local. Struggle to go anywhere on holiday that isn't a field. Their kids have never been to London and struggle in regional cities. They can't use public transport without anxiety. They can however use an axe, whittle wood and fix a car from about age 6.

Mumsnet, as another PP said, is not representative of the world.

And yes. It can feel like a cult around here at times.

I raised my four in the countryside and they have all said they loved it and are glad we didn’t live in a city. None of them have any desire to move to a city. My dad lives in London so they have experienced the convenience of city life too in our trips to see him.

I hated it with a passion. Felt so isolated. Twenty five miles to school! So cut off from the world. I also had parents who didn’t like to ferry us around so once home from school that was it.

Yes, as a teen, I went to a larger school by bus (all teens got buses to a few schools 10-15 miles away), compared to the village school of about 100 pupils and 4 teachers for primary. And my DPs went to the city every weekend for food shopping/library/other bits as we were a large family.

But we had lots available locally - music (a few instruments), speech and drama, a few different sports (tennis, gymnastics, Gaelic games, soccer, rowing), scouts (and guides in nearest town), youth club etc. We also had an active group who planned gigs for local bands (often local teens but a few getting more established) in the community centre every month or so. And swimming lessons every summer (water safety Ireland used to send teams of 2 instructors all over the country for a week at a time in different towns and villages throughout July/August and our village was on that list and me and most of my gang of friends went right up to lifeguard level). When we got to late teen years, parents and teens went to opposite corners of the same village pub at the weekend, and if there was a big enough gang of us out who wanted to go clubbing, we hired a mini bus to the local town (and often came out to find the full sized bus to bring us home as there were enough to nearly fill it).

We had a range of jobs available - babysitting, a couple of different shops, local chipper, local pubs, farming, cleaning holiday chalets. (I did some, but not all, of those)

There was a lot of hanging around the local playground - but we also had responsibilities at home, heavy loads of homework and minding younger siblings.

I remember going back over holidays when at uni and just thinking, there’s no way I’m moving back home after uni after experiencing city life. It was just incredibly boring back home and not being able to just ‘go out’.

Being able to just walk or get a bus is so freeing for work, hobbies etc. I’d hate my child to grow up being ferried everywhere in a car instead of walking.

Slight lol at four buses a day being rural. Our nearest bus stop was about 5 miles away. When we moved for work a few years back I deliberately sought out the best of both worlds - public transport to the city, 35 minutes, decent local bus links, and woodland on our doorstep.

I loved growing up rurally. My 14yo says they like where we live, but that's possibly because her dad and I endlessly taxi her about. She might feel differently if she was missing out on stuff with her friends. But, do and I promised ourselves we'd do this because of living somewhere awkward.

That went on in my village -but Dmum grew up rually herself and made sure we had no part of it - very restricted teen years.

The village I grew up in had bus stop, church, pub, primary school and a shop. It was about 2 miles to nearest town which had little in and another one to two to town with stuff in. No lights on footpaths out and dangerous junctions to get past.

It was starting to change when I was at school - but now it's not rural - it's literally on edge of town - in decades since urban sprawl pretty much swallowed it - it also now has a GP, chemist and a hairdressers about 5 new shops including chemist and two pubs - one modern one and now two playgrounds. It's also much bigger as they've had many more house built. Entire county where there were once farmers fields is now housing - and there still not enough hosue prices are really high.

Ironcially my parents ended up in viallge as it was cheaper than nearby towns - now it's much more expensive.

you can walk to the nearest big village via footpaths in 25 mins and that has trains and buses running to the nearest city every 30/60 mins up until 11pm

If footpaths are safe and lit really doesn't sound that bad at all - best of both worlds rural but able to get near urban centers if need to.

I loved living in the countryside, grew up with dogs and ponies at home. Best friend kept her pony next door. When I was 16 I joined young farmers (although we weren't farmers) and had a brilliant social life, my parents were prepared to do the running around to places until we could drive so we never felt isolated. Wouldn't want to live in a town or city, we still live rural now 😊

I love love loved it! My brother, on the other hand, found it dull and moved to London as soon as he could. (I reluctantly later moved to London for my career)

I think it depends on the person. Interestingly though, we've both moved out of London to raise our families

Loved it and all the teens around where we now live also seem very happy, I definitely wouldn't have wanted to live in a town or city, I think nowadays a city or town would actually mean a lot less freedom.

I did - way back in the 70s. It was genuinely idyllic - ponies, making rafts and sailing down the little river, building dens, camp fires, having picnics etc. I know it sounds very 'rose-coloured specs', but it really was like that for me.

I think children love it until hormones hit - and the age will vary for different children.

But, lovely though it was, real life (going to university and working in Birmingham and London) was a culture shock for me and it took me ages to catch up and become street-wise.

I felt sad that I couldn't give my children the same experience, but quite honestly they've grown up at the end of tube line into London and they've had a very privileged childhood - the countryside within walking distance and London easily within reach for when they were older.

I am aware of my and their privilege.

I grew up in a tiny village, hated it and got out as quickly as I could at 18. I now live in a major city in Australia and love it. Its nice to go and visit where I grew up occasionally, but I would never move back.