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Original poster

First house joys what did you get?

96 replies

Deebee90 · 27/05/2025 22:31

So completed on my first house today and got the keys. What lovely surprises did you get if any?

mine is 2 broken toliets and one including someone’s pee that they clearly couldn’t flush

also they’ve left me socks in the washing machine.

not checked the loft yet. House has supposedly been empty 7 months too since the owner passed away.

but I am on the housing market and that’s all that matters

OP posts:
DustyMaiden · 27/05/2025 22:36

Not my first house but once had washing up in the sink and a dog in the bathroom. Vendor came back 10pm to collect the dog, apparently it would’ve got in his way all day.

KabukiNoh · 27/05/2025 22:40

DustyMaiden · 27/05/2025 22:36

Not my first house but once had washing up in the sink and a dog in the bathroom. Vendor came back 10pm to collect the dog, apparently it would’ve got in his way all day.

OMG. You win with the dog.

TheNightingalesStarling · 27/05/2025 22:40

We found a total of 4 saws in odd places... behind the bath panel, in the hedge, behind the water tank and under a kitchen cabinet.

We think the previous owners were just prone to losing them rather than a purpose to them.

GlutesthatSalute · 27/05/2025 22:40

Awww. It would have been my dog now

UseNailOil · 27/05/2025 22:41

CONGRATULATIONS!
Dishwasher dead
Washing machine dead
Kitchen units rotton inside

JaceLancs · 27/05/2025 22:43

My first house was left flowers and a bottle of champagne from previous owner
Second house arrived to find they had taken the curtain poles, light fittings, and even bizarre things like door handles and knobs from fitted wardrobe doors
Left us loads of rubbish and a dead chest freezer in the garage

Original poster
Deebee90 · 27/05/2025 22:45

DustyMaiden · 27/05/2025 22:36

Not my first house but once had washing up in the sink and a dog in the bathroom. Vendor came back 10pm to collect the dog, apparently it would’ve got in his way all day.

🤣🤣 you actually win with the dog, I would have loved a dog today instead I got loads of spiders

OP posts:
BloddersMum · 27/05/2025 22:46

Five ducks in the garden!

Congratulations on the new home.

Arquebuse · 27/05/2025 22:46

This was a former party house, so we got teen sex graffiti in the most unexpected places eg ‘Jaquii Horan blowjobqueen’ in what is now my study. One of those depictions of an erect penis and testicles drawn by someone who doesn’t ever appear to have seen one, in the now utility. 😀

In a previous rental, a stack of wank mags from the 1980s with the pages stuck together on top of a high built-in wardrobe.

Arquebuse · 27/05/2025 22:47

Oh, and congratulations, OP. Crack open some champagne despite the toilets!

SatsumaCat · 27/05/2025 22:47

We got a bunch of flowers, a booklet of info about the house and neighbours, and a spotlessly clean and empty house. We were very lucky.

BraOffPjsOn · 27/05/2025 22:48

Walked into the kitchen and walked back out crying as it was so disgusting - my dad then said ‘you’re not going to use this are you?’ And ripped the whole kitchen out!
I couldn’t go back in there until my mum came round with a lot of bleach!
After hours of cleaning, we went to sit outside away from all the filth for some fresh air - looked around us in the back garden and there was dog poo absolutely everywhere.

We named it the clown house as every wall was an awful colour - if I want anyone to suffer I will paint coving in glossy and lots of different colours…

MrsAvocet · 27/05/2025 22:48

Nothing unpleasant or dirty, but our first home, bought in the early 90s had had no updating done since the 60s and we had some shocks as to quite how hard the reservations were and lots of things went wrong, the biggest of which was attempting to remove the tiles all over the kitchen. We'd been trying to chisel them off individually and getting nowhere fast, so one of our friends picked up a hammer and gave the wall a big whack. There was a loud cracking noise and next thing we knew we were standing in a pile of debris and when the clouds of dust cleared we found that the entire wall of tiles and the underlying plaster had all come off in one go and we were looking at large expanse of bare brick. It's lucky none of us was hurt really. It took a long time, and a lot of money to put right!

mnahmnah · 27/05/2025 22:51

An envelope full of cash behind a radiator

Ineedanewsofa · 27/05/2025 22:54

Nothing beats the dog 🤣
Laminate flooring which was glued to the floor
Ceramic fuse board which kept blowing fuses (and no fuse wire!)
one million spotlights in the living room ceiling - had to leave two bulbs out at all times otherwise it blew the aforementioned fuse board
A shed full of shit which they ‘forgot’ to empty apparently
And they took the bloody wheelie bins! (They did bring those back in fairness)

MidnightMusing5 · 27/05/2025 23:09

JaceLancs · 27/05/2025 22:43

My first house was left flowers and a bottle of champagne from previous owner
Second house arrived to find they had taken the curtain poles, light fittings, and even bizarre things like door handles and knobs from fitted wardrobe doors
Left us loads of rubbish and a dead chest freezer in the garage

I’m assuming you didn’t pay them full asking price , so they got petty 😂 ( I don’t agree with what they did though. Mean)

Justchillinhere · 27/05/2025 23:10

Nailed down carpet in the bathroom, nails in doorframes, water leak

maddening · 27/05/2025 23:13

1st house was lovely with champagne and a card from the sellers.

2nd house was a fully furnished show house.

Looking at some of these we were clearly blessed!

clickyteeclick · 27/05/2025 23:15

Not a house we bought as such but my mum worked for an estate agent for a while and was showing people around a house for sale that had been empty for years and was up for auction. I was bored as a kid and was having a nose around and cane across a box with writing on it. Had a peek inside and asked my mum what all the grey stuff was…it was… somebody’s ashes who’d passed away 😱

Hairyfairy01 · 27/05/2025 23:18

A load of sheep carcasses in the garden. We live in a housing estate so not a farm house or anything.

The dog still wins

RedOtter101 · 27/05/2025 23:20

Underpants and trousers in the crappy tumble drier they didn't want, an attic they forgot to empty and a bottle of Bailey's in the back of a kitchen cupboard!

iheartcatz · 27/05/2025 23:34

My first flat i bought i had a burnt pizza in the oven and a pair of boys pants left in the bath. I refused to use the oven and immediately ordered a new one.

Bellabatwings · 27/05/2025 23:55

91 nails in the walls, a handbag stashed behind the heating system filed with debt collection letters, porn mags hidden under the bedroom carpet and cig butts in the kitchen sink.

KabukiNoh · 28/05/2025 00:27

iheartcatz · 27/05/2025 23:34

My first flat i bought i had a burnt pizza in the oven and a pair of boys pants left in the bath. I refused to use the oven and immediately ordered a new one.

what was wrong with the oven? It was just a burnt pizza. Clearly based on other responses it could have been a cremated dog. I would also probs change my oven in those circumstances…

VerityUnreasonble · 28/05/2025 00:32

Pool table.

In one of the bedrooms of a standard sized semi-detached, didn't have a billiards room or anything. It made getting a bed in there a bit inconvenient.

Edit to add: DH was quite sad I wouldn't let him keep it and just make one of the children camp in the garden or something.