Upset with my boss. AIBU?

[BananaPuddingCream]

I work Monday to Friday in an office job. Today is Sunday (and a bank holiday). My boss texts me this morning saying there was an issue with something and that I had to log on. I was out at the time and she texts me 7(!!!) in a row. Then my husband called me and we had a long chat as he’s working away at the moment. Between being out and speaking to my husband, I didn’t see the messages for a while.

She seemed annoyed but I told her I could check in 30 mins, but I just had a feeling she was making more of a deal of something than was necessary. I didn’t say that, though, and was happy to have a little look incase it actually was an emergency.

I did what I needed to do and gave her the feedback that there was no issue on my end. But she pushed and asked me to contact other teams to have them check too. Again, these other teams also work Monday to Friday. She told me she I HAD to handle and keep checking the rest of the day because it was one of her children’s birthday.

One senior person got back to me and said there was no issue. And they seemed annoyed I had reached out. I had to wait 4 hours for their response. My entire Sunday afternoon, I spent by my laptop, refreshing emails and reaching out to as many people as possible because my boss said so. To note, my boss could have reached out and done the above checks. She did not need me to, other than the fact it was her daughter’s birthday.

anyway, I messaged my boss to say the issue was not an issue and everything was ok. She read it and didn’t reply.

I am furious. I wasted so much time. I hate my job and I’m so burnt out. Last time I was on anual leave, she messaged the entire time. I was looking forward to a break this weekend. I had to cancel my plans for the afternoon. I also burst into tears. AIBU considering it’s her child’s bday, should I have just been kind and got on with it? I think it’s the fact I was TOLD I had to handle it, rather than asking if I was able to. I feel like I’m a child.

If you're not on call or on some sort of flexi-time where you do sometimes work at the weekend, then a simple 'My office hours are [insert hours], and I won't be responding to work calls outwith this time'.

Advise her that at 5pm on Friday until 9am on Monday and holidays etc, her number will be blocked.

Say you’re sorry to have to take this stance, however as you had to cancel plans and your weekend was spoilt, you have no other choice.

Advise her to consider her actions and why you’ve felt the need to do this.

I had a boss who would text us and rant at us at times we were not working. It really pissed me off and I left.

Are you entitled to sick pay? If you are I would be calling in sick on Tuesday morning for the burnout and making an appointment to see your doctor. I would then inform her you will not be taking any work calls and decline any that come through.

This. She sounds like a fucking nightmare.

I had a new CEO who would sometimes email late in the evening, but I would not reply until office hours in the morning. I've worked in places before where you were expected to be "on" all the time and your life was not your own but where I work now, you down tools and do not look at your emails until working hours in the morning, and I was keen to maintain that, as the next most senior person, and he now only contacts people in work hours.

The government are actually trying to bring employee "right to disconnect" into legislation, as several other countries have.

I have a dual sim phone and actually switch my work sim off outside work hours, and disable notifications from Outlook.

YABU to respond to work emails on days when you are not being paid to work unless it is an emergency.

She is doing this because you are letting her.

Do you have an HR department?

Yes you do. If they are so close, nothing will change. Awful environment.