How much to give for the wedding?

[Newusername1234567]

My husband and I are not British (although he was born here but raised elsewhere). He was invited to a wedding (without me or kids) by his work colleague, she invited the whole team. Bride and groom don’t want any gifts besides money (they put it very nicely in the invitation btw!). What is the tradition here? How much do you put in an envelope?

In Ireland people generally cover the plate too so if both going to full wedding this would be €150+ depending on how well you know the couple.

Nope. Polish and we give ridiculously too much, even if we cant afford it🤷🏻‍♀️

So…they invite you to their wedding that you say costs ‘a fortune’ but by inviting you that means you have to pay? Just set up a go fund me instead…might be able to afford a better wine for the toast or a free bar? Anyone asking for payment to their wedding and doesn’t have a free bar are to be avoided.
Asking for money is the absolute height of crassness…and begging at its finest.

This comes up often and usually the poster gets many mixed answers. Don’t think there is a wrong or a right amount to be honest.

For me going to a wedding on my own with no kids I would give £50.

Always interesting when these threads pop up to see what others say, for example I have read that you need to cover your plate? I find that one very strange, to me it feels like paying for the couples wedding?🤷🏼‍♀️
Another one that I have seen pop up on here is being Irish you give over £100, I’m Irish and have never heard that until I read it on here,

£100 pp attending here too.

It’s not the giving of money. It’s the being asked for money.

I always feel embarrassed for people who basically say ‘here’s the invitation and we also expect you to pay us to come’. It’s greedy and grasping.

I really don't agree it's grabby.

£25 for evening only. £50 for day guest or £100 if they’re someone very special to me.

Of course it is. No one would invite people to their child’s christening and include an ask for money with the invitation. You wouldn’t ask people to bring a cash gift to a tenth birthday party or an anniversary party or a retirement party. It would clearly be rude.

I have no idea why it’s become acceptable to invite someone to a party and request that the invitee hands over money at the same time.

£100 for all day

I think this too. £50 buys nothing now.

If I am giving money as a present I usually give them £50 in whatever currency for their honeymoon for a meal out.

£20 is really tight, unless you’re genuinely skint. Sorry.

I’d give £50 which should cover what they spend on my meal.

It varies but I’d say fifty quid.

I got married four years ago and although we didn’t ask people did gift euros for our honeymoon.
I had one work colleague gift 20 and family gift 100 plus. Both amounts are generous in my opinion.

For a work colleague I’d probably expect a collection and put £5-10 in

Between 20 and 50 for a single invitation.
I usually cover the meal and a bit extra, depending upon the type of wedding it is or who the couple are.

I'm assuming you don't get invited to many weddings, or indeed social occasions....

I can't work out why you would go to the effort of someone you presumably LIKE and deliberately buy them a shit gift you know they don't want? Just to make some bizarre point.

Most people actually like their friends and family so don't begrudge getting them a gift (including money) they'll actually make use of and appreciate!

It's not about 'paying for their wedding' -anyone who has organised a wedding in the last decade or two would understand than £50 in a card won't touch the sides of the cost per guest.

Eastern European here. We pay around £500 per couple at weddings. I recently paid £300 per couple at a christening as we were not close with the parents. While I think that’s too much, paying only £50-£100 per couple is too little.
I would pay for the cost of my meal and drinks plus a little bit extra as a present. A 3 course meal wirh wine and a modest present - the cheapest you can go in £75 pp.

That’s just the type of gal I am!