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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Noisy spa

41 replies

goudacheese · 24/05/2025 08:36

I went with DH to Center Parcs Aqua Sana, not having been to a spa since before COVID. I was shocked at the noise level as before COVID, I was a regular spa goer and part of the experience was enjoying the peace and rain forest music.

We went into various rooms with beds and loungers and each time there was incessant low talking or the most irritating whispering. In the end DH coughed and said shut up at the same time and that worked.

The spa was lovely apart from this and now I'm wondering if being 60 has made me an old grouch.

OP posts:
Bunnycat101 · 24/05/2025 08:39

I find this particularly annoying at centre parcs tbh. I think there are often hen dos or bigger group but I do think some people just don’t realise how loud they are. I haven’t found the same level of noise at other spas.

Mightyhike · 24/05/2025 08:40

Low talking doesn't seem like a problem to me? Lots of people go to a spa with a friend and want to chat as well as relax (unless there's a specific 'quiet room' which should be respected of course).

Gloriia · 24/05/2025 08:42

Incessant low talking and whispering sounds ok? If they'd been shouting and partying fine but that sounds normal.

It's a spa in centrerparcs not a retreat in Tibet. Your coughing pa dh sounds more annoying tbh.

CrowMate · 24/05/2025 08:44

Coughing and saying shut up is extremely rude and hostile at a spa. Annoying as chatter is, there are more appropriate ways to deal with it.

Whaleandsnail6 · 24/05/2025 08:44

I don't think there is anything wrong with quiet talking, I wouldn't expect silence except when massage or treatments are going on.

I can't believe your husband did the passive aggressive cough...thats just rude

MoistVonL · 24/05/2025 08:45

I think it’s you and your DH who are out of sync. Low talking in a spa is fine. Raucous laughing and shouting and passing wine around is not ok, but quiet conversations are perfectly acceptable.

sciaticafanatica · 24/05/2025 08:47

your husband sounds like a passive aggressive prick!

Notmydaughteryoubitch · 24/05/2025 08:47

What rooms were you in, around the pool, in the hot tub, sauna, steam room etc then low level chatter absolutely expected. In a treatment obviously not and the relaxation room should typically be quiet too as people (me) often have a little post treatment nap in there...

SummaLuvin · 24/05/2025 08:50

Mightyhike · 24/05/2025 08:40

Low talking doesn't seem like a problem to me? Lots of people go to a spa with a friend and want to chat as well as relax (unless there's a specific 'quiet room' which should be respected of course).

this is what I think. I have never been to a spa alone, so I am often with people I want to chat to, however in the designated quiet spaces I will just read. As you say 'various rooms' and most spas have 1 (max 2) relaxation rooms I think you were probably BU in some spaces but not others.

eldermillenialmum · 24/05/2025 08:52

How very rude of your husband

MumChp · 24/05/2025 08:54

Center Parcs are never quite. FInd a smaller and more exclusive spa next time.

Gloriia · 24/05/2025 09:06

MumChp · 24/05/2025 08:54

Center Parcs are never quite. FInd a smaller and more exclusive spa next time.

Yes it's like going to CP tropical paradise and complaining that it wasn't tropical or a paradise and there were children making a noise.

VWT5 · 24/05/2025 09:27

Yes, I’m with you op.
In NL/Germany/Austria it was made very clear to me as a young 20 something year old what the spa/sauna etiquette was (“I was young, how would I be expected to know if I didn’t read the signage or until they told me” is what they said). The older people taught the younger people.

A nice example in a German sauna in Spain - toddlers hour where parents bring children, demonstrate to shower first, sit quietly on a towel in the sauna, don’t fidget, be calm, shower after, all naked, and all happily rewarded with an ice lolly afterwards.

Whispering / low level talking sometimes ok-ish - but you do have to read the room, and I don’t think generally younger generation Brits are always doing this.

I think in UK there seems to be little knowledge generally of spa etiquette and guests often just don’t read either the signage or read the room - i.e. you can just quietly observe how to behave in the environment you are in.

I will be shot down probably, but do spend 50% of my time in these settings and sadly it’s often younger generations of Brits that I just quietly observe being inappropriate and disturbing other guests - UK and Europe wide.

In Spain it might clearly be marked as a “zona de silencio” in a spa for example, with signage asking for quiet respect for all guests, but it’s the Brits most often spoiling it for everyone.

In Croatia, English staff themselves disrespecting the facilities, being shouty, and inappropriately dressed, wearing outdoor sports clothing in the pools…when the signage indicates otherwise, “washing” their dirty footwear in the pools, some women screeching like they are at party central.
In UK in a quiet sauna where everyone is relaxing silently and young adults come in loudly with “shall we stop in ASDA for fish fingers on the way home babe?” comments or phones in the sauna on loudspeaker (when challenged saying they are “on a business call” - when it’s Tik-Tok).

Gloriia · 24/05/2025 09:37

'but it’s the Brits most often spoiling it for everyone'

Oh dear. That's like saying your Germans nick all the sunbeds, I won't say that though as it sounds xenophobic.

Centerparcs is a holiday park. Known for groups and lots of activities including a 'spa'.

If the op plus coughing dh wanted a silent spa experience I'd suggest they choose a better venue tbh.

amybabysa · 24/05/2025 09:40

why did you go to centerparks if you aren’t bringing children? That sounds bizarre. Book into a fancy spa elsewhere.

furrysocks · 24/05/2025 09:42

Tbh this annoys me too. I find it so hard to switch off properly when people are talking, although if they are making an effort to whisper and be aware of their surroundings then I’m a bit more tolerant. Drives me mad in the steam room in the gym when groups of friends come in and just talk at a normal volume - go to the café if you want to chat loudly! We just don’t have the spa etiquette that other countries do. Ultimately the spas themselves need to enforce which areas are ok to talk in and which are silent areas, so everyone is clear on what’s expected.

SeventeenClovesOfGarlic · 24/05/2025 09:42

Does low talking and whispering count as being noisy?
If I were there I would have been annoyed at some man coughing (yuck) and ordering customers to shut up.

Enigma53 · 24/05/2025 09:45

Is everyone meant to be in complete silence? Low level whispering is acceptable I would think.

goudacheese · 24/05/2025 09:46

amybabysa · 24/05/2025 09:40

why did you go to centerparks if you aren’t bringing children? That sounds bizarre. Book into a fancy spa elsewhere.

Who said I didn't bring children?? I had my adult children and grandchildren with us.

OP posts:
GargoylesofBeelzebub · 24/05/2025 09:50

I think low level talking and whispering is fine. A spa is quite often a shared experience with friends. It would be weird to expect complete silence.

TheatreTraveller · 24/05/2025 09:51

Your husband sounds very rude.
I don't think people should be disturbing others by being unreasonably loud but whispering/quiet talking seems fine unless there's signs clearly stating otherwise.

Typin · 24/05/2025 09:51

VWT5 · 24/05/2025 09:27

Yes, I’m with you op.
In NL/Germany/Austria it was made very clear to me as a young 20 something year old what the spa/sauna etiquette was (“I was young, how would I be expected to know if I didn’t read the signage or until they told me” is what they said). The older people taught the younger people.

A nice example in a German sauna in Spain - toddlers hour where parents bring children, demonstrate to shower first, sit quietly on a towel in the sauna, don’t fidget, be calm, shower after, all naked, and all happily rewarded with an ice lolly afterwards.

Whispering / low level talking sometimes ok-ish - but you do have to read the room, and I don’t think generally younger generation Brits are always doing this.

I think in UK there seems to be little knowledge generally of spa etiquette and guests often just don’t read either the signage or read the room - i.e. you can just quietly observe how to behave in the environment you are in.

I will be shot down probably, but do spend 50% of my time in these settings and sadly it’s often younger generations of Brits that I just quietly observe being inappropriate and disturbing other guests - UK and Europe wide.

In Spain it might clearly be marked as a “zona de silencio” in a spa for example, with signage asking for quiet respect for all guests, but it’s the Brits most often spoiling it for everyone.

In Croatia, English staff themselves disrespecting the facilities, being shouty, and inappropriately dressed, wearing outdoor sports clothing in the pools…when the signage indicates otherwise, “washing” their dirty footwear in the pools, some women screeching like they are at party central.
In UK in a quiet sauna where everyone is relaxing silently and young adults come in loudly with “shall we stop in ASDA for fish fingers on the way home babe?” comments or phones in the sauna on loudspeaker (when challenged saying they are “on a business call” - when it’s Tik-Tok).

You spend 50% of your time in spas? I want your life!

Groundhedgehogday · 24/05/2025 09:52

Was it a silent spa? Otherwise I can't see why you'd have a problem with people talking quietly

Cnidarian · 24/05/2025 09:53

Oh I will be a grumpy curmudgeon with you I agree. Honestly if you're using the time to catch up with a friend you should be at LUNCH! Not invading my only quiet time with a full inventory report of how various children's exams are going, the care needs of elderly relatives, the latest drama from so and so in the village. PLEASE. One place for quiet peace, please!

IHateMoist · 24/05/2025 09:56

Aqua Sana has definitely got worse with the noise level. The staff don’t seem to manage it very well at all. People are just really inconsiderate and/or completely ignorant of the etiquette. There are plenty of spaces besides the steam rooms/saunas/relaxation rooms that people can go to for a conversation but they don’t.

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