DD is 13 and has always been part of a large friend group, since kindergarten. So socially everything seemed to go perfectly well;
Since the beginning of this school year, the classes got mixed up and I got the sense something was starting to be off. No more sleepovers, shopping with friends etc. Even with her, until now best friend. Whenever I asked her if everything was all right or told her something seemed of or strange, she got angry with me and told me not to be so worried as everything was ok...I then told her it's my job as a mum to worry and that I hoped that if anything was wrong she'd tell me.
This best friend has changed a lot, since she started to hang out with two new girls. And now they have started to bully DD, in my opinion. She is still 'normal to DD when it's just the two of them.
Yesterday she called me very upset while on her way home.
There had been a stench in their classroom, and her so called best friend had started spreading the rumour (not true[ that this was because of DD. DD ended up crying as everyone in the class reacted with: eeewww DD... and because it was not true.
Apparently one of the two new girls had also complained about the weight of their backpacks. And for some unfathomable reason, my DD offered (or she says she offered[ to carry that backpack for that girl all week, the other girl seems to have carried hers. During one class she then offered (again according to her[ for some reason to do her homework as that girl hadn't done it and didn't understand it!
Then after school that new clique of 3 girls (including her so called best fiend[ biked in front of her, and at the traffic lights, the 'best friend' turned around with 'a bitchy face' and said loudly: 'oh there she is' in a snide way.
DD understandably very upset and so are we as parents. She says everyone hates her now. If ever I get my hands on those mean girls... also I can't for the life of me understand why oh why did DD carry that backpack and do the homework etc.. I told her to promise me to never ever do anything like that again, also that 'best friend' is not a friend.
She then said she wanted to make up with her, but I warned her to look for other friends, as this is not the behaviour of friends.
Int eh end the 'best friend' said sorry in snapchat (not enough for me but then I am not a teenager today.
Another girl had told my DD to tell all of this to one of the teachers as she thinks this behaviour is not ok.
Of course I am really worried, angry, sad etc about all of this. But I have no idea how to help her. The parents of the 'best friend' are acquaintances of ours, but I think contacting them may backfire.
I guess I am looking for any insights or tips from you all, maybe teachers even?
How to help my daughter through this and hopefully help her find new friends?
Also, AIBU to now think these girls are absolutely vile and not worthy of my DD friendship?