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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Right decision? Relationship help

2 replies

hopefultragedy · 17/05/2025 22:32

My DD is 5 years old, 6 this year.

Her Dad is useless, really unreliable, not trustworthy, not safe to be around our daughter, makes awful decisions, is really not a dad. I left him when our DD was 1.5 years old.

I met my now ex when she was 2, he has been in my daughter’s life since. We’ve been up and down, many ups which were great, many downs which were not great of course. I’ve been told by others he had been emotionally abusing me. I’m not going to go into detail but I can kind of see it now.

over the weekend, my daughters dad messaged me late at night saying “how’s things” he has done this a few times in the middle of the night or will call me when asleep. Baring in mind he does work late but doesn’t make effort with our daughter. I know he is most likely asking about our daughter but I told my now ex to be open and transparent. It didn’t end well, he was telling me I have pour judgement of people which is scary and more things. He wasn’t telling me to message him to leave me alone and block him but he was implying it. I tested it and sent the message and blocked him and my now ex was still not happy because in his eyes I was defending my daughters dad because I said I didn’t want to block him as he was my daughters dad, he knows I don’t want any contact but it’s still her dad?

AIBU? We have now broken up because if I’m being honest, I’m fed up. But now I’m doubting myself and thinking, should I have blocked him?

OP posts:
KarCat · 17/05/2025 22:36

Why on earth has your ex got any say in your communication with your daughters dad?

hopefultragedy · 17/05/2025 22:40

KarCat · 17/05/2025 22:36

Why on earth has your ex got any say in your communication with your daughters dad?

I don’t really know, I’m a FTM, my boundaries in general to start with were so slack I admit but I’m not sure. My daughter’s dad is effing useless and a total waste of space to put it kindly, I know that but yeah, I really don’t know what’s right and what’s wrong

OP posts:
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