Meltdowns after every GCSE exam

[mrsnjw]

Is this normal? My DD was ok during her mocks last year. Every time she has come home from an exam this week she has blown up. Disappointed that she got questions wrong or didn’t put something in a sixteen maker. Screams that it could be the difference between a five and a six grade. She doesn’t stop revising. Everyday for nine hours over Easter. She sobs and screams! Eventually she does calm down. My son is doing A levels and is the complete opposite. So chilled. AIBU to ask how to support and navigate the next three weeks?

I’ve been through it with two. One was very chilled, one was more like your DD. It’s really tough when they insist on a postmortem after every exam and only fixate on the negatives. It’s very common to do this. My DD was utterly distraught after one particular exam and every time she described it, it got worse and worse to the point I did actually wonder if she’d answered a single question. She ended up with a flipping 7 so honestly I think sometimes they just can’t help catastrophising but it’s v draining. I listened sympathetically and reminded her that our brains focus on things we think we got wrong but there will be lots that was right.

She’s probably fairly exhausted too. 9 hours a day sounds a lot. Could she be persuaded to take some more breaks? I was v worried about DD’s mental health during exam period but after half term, she seemed calmer. Really hoping that happens for you too x

I found that the difference wasn’t the DC themselves, but what their teachers were telling them. One set of teachers were telling my older DC that these exams are make or break, and will determine the rest of your life, and that not doing well means a life in poverty. I think the teachers chose that tactic because they didn’t want kids being lazy, but thing is my older DC is a bit of a worrying workaholic like me and this just sent her over the edge.

My younger DC had more rational teachers that were saying just do your best, don’t forget you can always resit, there are many paths to success if you’re not academically talented. The exam covers years of learning, so if you don’t know it now you won’t know it from last minute cramming. Best thing you can do is some practice questions and worksheets, get good rest and learn time management.

I would reassure my older DD as the messaging she got really stressed out by balancing it with messages similar to what my younger DC got. Interestingly, my younger DC got the higher grades.

Speak to the Head of Year. The kid's burned out.