Dads finances . Power of attorney

[TheGreenJoker]

I have power of attorney over my dad, he’s got a bank card because he likes to go and get a coffee etc .
He’s been getting £300 a week out of. He can’t remember why????
So… do I get his money out and give him an allowance? He keeps using his bill money on loads of random stuff yet don’t understand? Yes it is his money but he’s not paying bills :(
He likes to go on a walk. And get coffee etc? And I didn’t wanna restrict him but obviously it’s important he pays his bills and he can’t seem to understand?
Any advice please thankyou

My dad cancelled mums carers twice as he didn't recognise the payment. So bank have put a note to contact me if he tries to cancel a direct debit again. Maybe you could arrange a top-limit for him to take out that triggers an alert if he goes over?

Speak to the Bank to see if they can put card controls on for him. I work for a Bank and we offer varying levels from being able to restrict online purchases, setting daily withdrawal limits, setting spend limits etc.

that way he can still have a card but you can limit it to say only £20 a day or something. And it won’t affect his usual bills or direct debits.

Maybe get him a prepaid cash card?

With the POA, you can also reach the point where you can stop him having bank access if that's in his best interests.

Yes, if he hasn't got capacity to manage his own finances, manage it for him - pay his bills, give him a sensible amount of cash for his treats, keep the cards, monitor his statements. People in his position often fall victims to scammers and crooks. And if you don't have the health POA, try to get it (although once someone has already lost capacity, this is tricky unless you know a solicitor who's prepared to bend a rule).

You could give an allowance via a go Henry card. You can add spending and cash withdrawal restrictions as needed.

I had a similar situation with my dad when he became unable to fully manage his finances and he was actually very worried about it. I suggest you sit down with your dad and in a gentle way explain that you have concerns about the bills not being met. Then agree a way forward to give him some freedom to pay for coffees etc within an agreed cash allowance that you get for him each week. I hope it’s not the case but you need to be sure that nobody is taking advantage of his generosity as it sounds like he is financially vulnerable. I think you need to take his debit card away (inform the bank too) and only then will you have control over his money to meet all the bills etc. that’s your role as his attorney, and you could remind him that he has nominated you for this role within his LPA. It may not be such a difficult conversation as you imagine but if it is you know you’re doing the right thing and things will calm down.

when I explained this to my dad he was actually relieved not to have to worry about the the bills etc. I supplied him with cash, paid bills, organised appointments and paid for optician, chiropodist, cleaner, shopping etc online.

My step father did this and we found loads of cash at home. Check how and when the withdrawals are being made. I would speak to the bank about stopping the card. Maybe open up a small instant saver account with just n atm card or limited access.

MIL did exactly the same. Would withdraw £200-£300 out of the cash machine at least weekly and it would just disappear. She'd deny withdrawing it and never had a clue what she spent it on. No sign of her buying things - nothing new ever in the house that we didn't buy with her. It just kept vanishing into thin air!

We can only assume she randomly/accidentally threw it away. We were convinced we'd find a stash of cash in her house once she passed, but when that happened, we found nothing anywhere.

It's not as if she went anywhere. She'd only go out once a week to pay her papers and inbetween she'd go to the corner shop for some milk or bread etc. We took her to the supermarket for her weekly "big" shop that she paid for by card and took her into town to buy clothes, birthday/christmas presents/cards etc again which she paid by card. She never went out for coffees, didn't have friends, didn't go to clubs/church, etc.

We ended up transferring excess monies out of her card account into a passbook account to limit her spending, and to prevent her being conned (her neighbour got conned out of thousands by a dodgy gypsy roofing firm who kept taking him to a cash dispenser to withdraw hundreds at a time for alleged roof "repairs"!). We did think the same may have been happening to her, but both my sister and I would pop in to see her at random times of day, one of us at least daily, and she was always in the house, never any sign of traders vans etc (we both live close so even if we didn't call in, we'd drive past at least daily).