If you can’t look after a pet you can’t look after a child

[TheLimeQuail]

AIBU

I’d let my mum look after my baby, but not my dog.

She’s had babies and looked after children before, but she’s never had a dog and is a bit scared of them so wouldn’t be able to deal with the dog in any sort of emergency situation.

So no, I don’t think the two are comparable.

I had a dog before I had my kids. I found her hard to look after.
Hard to give her enough time around the need to work. Annoying that I couldn't take her into the pub with me. A pain to find places to walk her in the city
Then I had a baby and it was much easier. A lot of those things weren't a concern at all.
I've got another dog now and it's much easier. There's four of us to look after him. We're able to work from home and we live somewhere much greener.
But I also have three rats and they're very tough to look after. Much harder to tame than I'd anticipated. Stink the whole house out and surprisingly medically vulnerable.
In general: pets are hard.
Don't even get me started on house plants. Can't keep them alive at all!

I get what you’re saying about the biological and psychological ties to a child but I don’t think this always applies. Look at all the parents that mistreat/abuse their children. Also agree just because people who don’t have interest in being a pet owner or say they don’t like animals doesn’t mean they can’t look after a child well.

Also vice/versa when people say they don’t like children doesn’t mean they can’t look after a pet.

Agree that people are being a bit obtuse here. Someone who neglects or abuses a pet is surely more likely to neglect or abuse a child. And if you can’t afford food and vet care for a pet, you’ll probably struggle to provide for a child.

Yes, most children do eventually mature and gain independence, but they live much longer than your average pet, and can speak up for themselves if they think your parenting is/was substandard. It’s also much more socially acceptable to get rid of a pet if you can’t cope or just decide ownership isn’t for you. Where I live (not UK) the animal shelters are always full to pint of having to euthanise, and it’s fairly common practice to drive a dog you can’t look after/don’t want anymore into the countryside and abandon it.

I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who disliked dogs, although I can completely understand choosing not to have one. Ditto children, some people are child haters. Which is different to choosing not to have any.

I do, however, dislike cats 😂

I think what OP may be trying to express is something like this:

You are a singleton. No kids. You decide to buy a dog - your first ever. You make this decision of your own volition. You really want a dog.

You:

• Do no research into caring for the dog.
• Buy minimal if any enrichment toys for the dog.
• Are lax about taking the dog for walks.
• Leave the dog alone for lengthy periods.
• Often forget to feed and water the dog.
• Show the dog little affection.
• Dog is often left alone at night whilst you're out on the tiles.

In other words, you do feck all to adapt your lifestyle to your dog's needs and put your own wishes and pleasures above the dog's at all times. You make no sacrifices or accommodations to this animal whatsoever.

Would you say this person is likely to make a good parent?

DD begged for a dog. I did not want a dog. She promised faithfully that she would look after the dog and that was the agreement that we got a dog on.
She hardly ever walks it. Never picks dogs poop up. Won't feed the dog or give fresh water. She has a multitude of excuses as to why not or says its not essential to walk, pick up poop or give fresh water.
DD has expressed how much she would like to be a mother.
I don't agree she is anywhere near ready for a child when she wont even share the work of looking after the dog that she begged for, for years.
So in my case, I agree OP.

Sometimes it's easier to look after a pet. On the other hand my cat is far harder work than my kid ever was.

My cat is an utter fuckwit though.

Can I ask you why you wouldn’t be friends with someone who disliked dogs?

6 kids and have had throughout my life had 12 dogs.
dogs can defiantly be harder, they’re a whole different species.

I came to say the same about plants lol my kids are 1000000% easier to look after than all my pets!

You can't take a dog on public transport and you can't leave a small child at home all day alone like you can leave a cat

I actually think there is some truth in this. If you choose to have a dog then cannot be arsed to actually look after it? Then I would question your parenting ability.
On the other side of that, I am an excellent dog owner, but I would have been a very shit parent. Personally, I think it’s different. Dogs have very basic needs that you need to meet. Food, exercise, discipline, affection. Children need way more than that.

Puppies are WAY harder than babies.

It was definitely easier to look after my children even when they were babies than looking after our horses . Children and babies are portable , food / milk easily available , no time restraints and they are usually where you are - it’s a doddle compared with a horse on DIY who is very set on her routine . I actually think my late dog was harder to look after than my children as well , they certainly gave me less trouble at night bless him .

I cant keep a plastic house plant alive says all you need to know about me.
Last time i tried to keep a plant i was watering the plastic one instead.

Edited to say im not joking above did happen.

A child is definitely easier than a puppy

I think we need a bit more context but on the face of it you are being totally unreasonable

My children don’t try to break fences and gates, or crawl under fences. They also listen (mostly) when I call😅 They have also never scratched or bitten me (viper cat!!!) I love my dog and cat but my god we will be an animal free family after they go!! Yabu in my opinion!

Dogs are a huge part of my life, almost as though it's part of my personality to love them, think about them and hang out with them. I'd be friendly, but I don't want to do much that isn't dog related and I don't like going anywhere without my dog really.

I managed to kill the tropical fish but all my dc survived. Yabu.

Same with me with plants. I cannot for the life of me keep a house plant alive. But my children are thriving.
Maybe its that unconditional love that i don't quite have for the plants that I do have for my kids 😂

What if you don't want to look after a dog?

Once you get beyond the baby stage children are way easier to look after than dogs.

I find it amusing how there are a billion checks to adopt a cat at a shelter, but anyone can pop out a child with none whatsoever.

I agree, how you take care of a pet is very often indicative of how you might a child. Obviously they might present in different ways of course. You might not give a pet attention, or buy it a toy and just hope it entertains itself, whereas you might just give your child unlimited screen time. There are parallels.