To be annoyed when people who are running their own side hustles only give out crucial info last minute.com

[LostShepherdsPie]

I know I'm neurodiverse so my annoyance at this may seem unreasonable to some and so that is why I am posing the question because I genuinely do find this v.irritating but perhaps to others it isn't a big deal.

Someone local cooks homemade food and sells this to others, she post regularly on a neighbour group - where many others who have a little side hustle promote their services - she posted saying she's cooking a particular dish I like and then reached out to me personally the next day to let me know she still has portions left. I told her unfortunately I'd love to but I'm at work and don't drive so I couldn't collect and she responded she can sometimes do deliveries.
I asked if it isn't too short notice could she deliver tonight, after an hour waiting for confirmation, a bit of back and forth and me leaving exact money by door for my DH to give her so I can soak in a bathtub for the first time in weeks she texts asking if I could kindly pay a small delivery charge. I feel she should really have mentioned delivery charges before, I was a bit 50/50 over ordering as im trying to cut down on spending and also I left exact money downstairs and DH gets in a bit of a strop if he finds himself having to rummage around for cash

Also I kinda got the impression these were excess portions from an order she had or she was out and about anyway.

Same thing happened with someone else, one hour before an appointment I finally get some answers to questions like how long the appointment will take, where her address is, that she might need to cancel , exact costs...

Because it's an individual I don't want anyone to be out of pocket but just be upfront with costs in the first place.

V. Hungry now as I didn't realise she would take over 1.5 hours to deliver...

It doesn’t matter if they were excess portions, they took the same amount of effort.

It sounds like you have been getting free delivery for a while, she deserves to be paid fairly for the service she provides.

Yes, technically she should have told you about the delivery fee earlier but remember you yourself acknowledge this was a short notice request from you as well for her to deliver that same night.

I’d have been annoyed at that too. People need to be clear up front in order to allow customers to make an informed choice.

But you asked her for a delivery at quite short notice (for a local person opposed to takeaway place)

Did you say you needed delivery by a certain time?

I'd have assumed there was a delivery cost and asked what it was at the time of organising things with her.

Good communication is sometimes about asking relevant questions - in your case I would have asked how much the order was in total, and what time she would deliver.

People aren't mind readers and we can have certain expectations in mind that others don't.

Disagree with this.

I don’t see that she has been getting free deliveries?

Also, Op didn’t request this. Op is trying to cut down on spending and this woman reached out to her directly and OP said ok.

the woman then added on delivery.

yes, this will frustrate me as well, OP. Next time, only get it if you fancy it, not because she messages you.

This would have annoyed me.

She approached you and when you said said no because you couldn't collect, she said she could deliver. It was at this point SHE should have added "for a small charge to cover petrol etc".

I am with OP on this one.

She should have been more professional about it and asked for delivery costs upfront, but it isn unreasonable to do so.

If I try a service and it doesn't work for me, I don't use it again. Last week I decided to not use a certain company to order online from, as their courier took three days to deliver it locally - I kept getting repeated delivery attempt failed messages after waiting all day (our office reception is manned 8-5pm so can't have attempted) More annoying the first was before a long weekend. So, I won't use again.

Such unprofessional behaviour doesn't fill me with confidence as to the standard of her kitchen or her hygiene qualifications! Our local crazy person got done selling her haphazard bakes without a registration..

Well, she doesn’t sound very professional so I’m not sure what you’d expect.

Has she got all her food hygiene certificates? Is she paying tax and national insurance? Probably not.

If someone is delivering something then I assume there will be a delivery cost.

It depends on how far people are travelling and sometimes they say not to worry about paying anything for delivery but most people who are going out of their way to deliver something ask for a fee.

I've only ordered from her once before and that was a pre arranged much larger delivery - I was hosting guests and on that occasion I was originally going to get DH to collect but she said she can deliver as she's local.

So no @nomas I have not been getting free deliveries for a while, and no where does it say I have.

Is it not fair for me to assume that the price she advertised in the local WhatsApp group is the total price? Am I supposed to be the mind reader and know that there will be additional charges?

Also, I asked if it was possible to deliver tonight AFTER she reached out to me directly and publicised that she had already cooked a large batch that day and was taking orders.

She's just someone local and I thought I was helping her out by going to her instead of local takeaway.

Is this all health and council or whatever safety things are needed approved?

Highly unlikely, more of a side hustle, cash in hand etc etc

I’ll go with YABU simply because you opened your post by saying you’re neurodivergent; and if you appreciate other people accommodating that in you, the same should work in reverse: how do you know this woman also isn’t neurodivergent and struggles with executive function or remembering to provide details unprompted?

It sounds like miscommunication rather than anything to stay annoyed about. I’d always ask if there was a delivery charge if something was being delivered; and I wouldn’t hold somebody running what you think is an informal sort of gig rather than a professional kitchen to the same standards as the latter. I just wouldn’t order again if it was too haphazard for what I needed.

I would expect to pay extra for a small food delivery.
She should mention that delivery costs extra, though I'd assume that it would on smaller orders.