Page 5 | … to be annoyed my son is missing break for yawning?

DameBaggySmith · 2025-05-14T20:55:35+00:00

My 7 y o is missing break tomorrow for yawning in class. He can be prone to being distracted and the child sitting next to him was already told off. However, he informs me on this occasion, all he did was yawn. The teacher then asked him if he yawned, rolled her eyes at him then put his name down to miss break. AIBU to think this is insane? Especially as a) they are only allowed access to water at break time which he often forgets and yawning can be a sign of dehydration and b) he's waiting for an ADHD assessment so giving him less chances to burn off energy isn't going to help. Obviously there is a chance that my son isn't telling the whole truth… which I will investigate, but if he is, I think this is ridiculous.

Goldbar · 15/05/2025 13:59

TheSwarm · 15/05/2025 10:18

It's 1 missed breaktime of what, 15 minutes? Maybe the child was playing up, maybe the teacher over reacted but it's done now. Not even remotely worth thinking about and I'm sure the child will completely forget about it in a day or 2.

For some children (I have one of them), that 15 minute playtime is important to let off steam so they can concentrate for the rest of the morning. I know my DC runs straight out of the classroom at playtime and does laps of the playground (literally runs around in circles). The teacher has told me this. For a child like that, it's counterproductive in terms of achieving the desired behaviour to keep them sitting down for longer.

Tripadvisor101 · 15/05/2025 14:30

Highlighta · 15/05/2025 13:28

I had to laugh at this. Dehydrated as haven't been able to have a sip of water for an hour.

I think back to our school days, and we had a plastic bottle which probably held a maximum of 200ml, to last us the entire day. And I went to school in a hot country. To be fair we had water fountains which of course, could only be used at break anyway.

I can only imagine how many trips to the toilet there must be when children are sipping on drinks all day and throughout class. Surely liquids are not allowed near books anyway?

Show quote history

Yeah it definitely wasn't a thing when I was a school to drink during lessons. Funnily enough I've never been dehydrated even in the summer.

CleverButScatty · 15/05/2025 14:37

Tripadvisor101 · 15/05/2025 14:30

Yeah it definitely wasn't a thing when I was a school to drink during lessons. Funnily enough I've never been dehydrated even in the summer.

Show quote history

It is a nightmare. Some children sip their water constantly, just absent mindedly really... something to do with their hands and then they need the toilet endlessly.

PensionedCruiser · 15/05/2025 14:45

DameBaggySmith · 14/05/2025 22:23

Yes it is one break and as I say, perhaps he was in the wrong. However school seems to be increasingly rigid.

The children weren't allowed to run on the playground at one point this year.

No access to water is counter-productive.

And currently dealing with another issue where the children in after school club say they're currently not allowed to talk in case it is too loud for the staff.

It just all seems to be getting quite silly.

Show quote history

So there's a child in class, being assessed for ADHD, yawning. The obvious punishment for this child is to withdraw break where he has the opportunity to run around and use up excess energy and take a drink to rehydrate if it is necessary. Sitting in a classroom without using up excess energy and dehydrated is really going to help, especially if he does have ADHD.

That sounds like the teachers who used to keep hyperactive little boys in at lunchtime and deny them PE for not sitting still in lessons. I really thought schools (or teachers) had more knowledge and sense these days. There are far better ways to express disapproval than to impose punishments that make the undesired symptoms of neurodivergent children, worse.

Beerhy · 15/05/2025 14:50

If it was a genuine yawn the teacher is obviously unreasonable. Yanbu. I just want to point out something that blew my mind after years of getting told off for “rolling my eyes” when I wasn’t. some people (neurotypical people apparently) see just raising the eyes slightly as rolling their eyes whereas I always thought it was the full blown eyes around the socket roll. Maybe get your kid to show what he did? It’s really hot atm I’m always bloody yawning so if I got called into the manager every time I yawned I’d probs not have a job. (Maybe also make sure he’s covering his mouth so it doesn’t look like a dramatic thing). I do feel like adults forget kids are humans sometimes and punish them for things that they would do themself 🙄

blubbyblub · 15/05/2025 15:26

Slightyamusedandsilly · 14/05/2025 22:29

Your 7 year old said the teacher rolled her eyes at him? And has that clarity of recall over the events? That is a remarkably astute recollection of events for a 7 year old.

Show quote history

At 7 I would have absolutely known if a teacher had rolled their eyes. I was a shy and quiet girl. I would have been mortified so 100% would have recalled that.

mathanxiety · 15/05/2025 15:48

Strictly1 · 14/05/2025 22:36

What consequence should children have?

Parents want children who are well behaved in school whilst also not wanting their children to ever have a consequence but others to be publicly slogged or accuse school of never doing anything.

When parents phone and tell teachers their child isn’t having x y or z consequence, it completely undermines the profession. This term alone we’ve had one parent openly say I’ve told her she can do as she likes, one say we need to tell them if we want to speak to their child about an incident and another that has told peers that it’s okay, mum will phone and tell them (staff) off.

Edited

Show quote history

Are you saying there should be 'consequences' for yawning?

EilonwyWithRedGoldHair · 15/05/2025 16:11

Valkyrie3 · 14/05/2025 22:09

Definitely depends on the type of yawn. Kids are quite prone to doing this in class for laughs/disruption/undermining the teacher. Without video evidence you don’t know which type of yawn it was, but teachers don’t usually withhold break time for an innocent, quiet yawn.

Long time ago now, but when I was 12 I remember our english teacher giving someone detention for yawning in class - there was nothing deliberately ostentatious about it, they just did a normal yawn, but the teacher decided it was disrespectful and implying her lesson was boring.

BertSymptom · 15/05/2025 16:28

Am I the only one who thinks it doesn’t matter whether the yawn was deliberate or not?

A 7 year old missing their break time seems disproportionate either way to me.

Original poster

DameBaggySmith · 15/05/2025 16:36

Slightyamusedandsilly · 15/05/2025 10:30

So this is Schrödinger's child, isn't it? Both astute enough to interpret and correctly intuit a teacher's eye roll, but equally, be so unknowing that they don't realise how a loud yawn can be interpreted as rude.

I get the distinct impression you are 'that parent'.

If you think this is bad, buckle up for secondary school. You're gonna be on the phone on a daily basis to complain.

Show quote history

Definitely not ‘that’ parent and have very rarely contacted school about my children.

And yes, children can know some things but not all things. However he didn't ‘interpret’ an eye roll, he described what happened.

At least I wont spend my days on the internet making assumptions about parents who I know nothing about :)

OP posts:

Original poster

DameBaggySmith · 15/05/2025 16:51

Tessasanderson · 15/05/2025 09:58

How about next time your child says they got a punishment for yawning in class you tell them to accept it and show more respect to the teacher. Job done, no issues and lesson learnt.

Or you could delve into it, Get a one sided view of things and then go online and get thousands of people to question it so that you can undermine the teachers authority. Teachers have it hard enough in difficult situations as it is. They cant be held to task for something so trivial as trying to instil a little bit of discipline into a child who yawned in class.

Show quote history

You don't know what I've said to my child, so why are you presuming I haven't done that?

There are several teachers in my family and I am aware of many of the pressures they face, however that doesn't mean they always act fairly.

OP posts:

Original poster

DameBaggySmith · 15/05/2025 16:57

Highlighta · 15/05/2025 13:28

I had to laugh at this. Dehydrated as haven't been able to have a sip of water for an hour.

I think back to our school days, and we had a plastic bottle which probably held a maximum of 200ml, to last us the entire day. And I went to school in a hot country. To be fair we had water fountains which of course, could only be used at break anyway.

I can only imagine how many trips to the toilet there must be when children are sipping on drinks all day and throughout class. Surely liquids are not allowed near books anyway?

Show quote history

Laugh if you like but dehydration is an issue for him and access to water at all times is actually the law. I do appreciate however that there are practical issues, especially with younger children.

OP posts:

Original poster

DameBaggySmith · 15/05/2025 16:57

Goldbar · 15/05/2025 13:59

For some children (I have one of them), that 15 minute playtime is important to let off steam so they can concentrate for the rest of the morning. I know my DC runs straight out of the classroom at playtime and does laps of the playground (literally runs around in circles). The teacher has told me this. For a child like that, it's counterproductive in terms of achieving the desired behaviour to keep them sitting down for longer.

Show quote history

Exactly.

OP posts:

spirit20 · 15/05/2025 16:57

When I was a teacher, I sent pupils out of lessons for yawning loudly. It's rude, and can easily be controlled. It wouldn't be acceptable for me to yawn repeatedly while I was teaching a lesson (as much as I wanted to at times), and it's not acceptable for pupils to do so.

I

Boomer55 · 15/05/2025 17:04

Guinessandafire · 15/05/2025 09:11

I think YABU for completely believing your 7 year old without question.

My guess is he did a fake yawn for attention and laughs, and got pulled up on it. Now he knows the consequence of doing that.

It's one break, and he's learned that being disruptive in class does not go unpunished.

The person that said you are going to have to pick your battles..I think they mean if you think this is harsh then you will be ' that parent' who constantly challenges the schools rules and disciplinary code which are there for a reason.

This. It obviously wasn’t a quiet discreet yawn. One missed break won’t kill anyone.🤷‍♀️

BerniesAuntie · 15/05/2025 17:06

I would imagine the teacher has some gaps to fill in on your child’s account of events. Having said that, keeping a 7 year old in seems counter productive. I don’t know what the weather is like where you are but I’d be wanting my child to have access to a water bottle too.

Original poster

DameBaggySmith · 15/05/2025 17:07

Snorlaxo · 15/05/2025 12:47

I think that is a need an update from OP now.

Either the child (he’s 7 so not judging) has left out some details that he didn’t realise was important like the yawn being a last straw or it being loud and dramatic (on purpose and disruptive) so everyone turned round to look or the teacher overreacted because this isn’t the first time that she’s told off the child and this was the last straw for her.

Missing break is a punishment for the teacher as well as the child since she probably uses break to go to the loo etc and now can’t do that until lunch.

Op if your son yawns, sneezes etc dramatically (no mouth covering etc ) then it might be time to advise him to start for manners sake. If things happened like he said then the yawn must have been very loud as it caused her to turn around in a classroom.

We have had a chat about this 😊

He demonstrated the yawn and it was like his usual ones which have some noise but not much, so we had a chat about yawns being rude and how he needs to learn to do them silently.

As I said, there have been a few other things in school and this is the latest one. I also don't think my child is perfect and by his own admission he can sometimes talk in class. However feedback from the teacher a few weeks ago was that he can chat a bit but isn't disruptive in class (part of his ADHD questionnaire).

OP posts:

Tripadvisor101 · 15/05/2025 17:07

DameBaggySmith · 15/05/2025 16:57

Laugh if you like but dehydration is an issue for him and access to water at all times is actually the law. I do appreciate however that there are practical issues, especially with younger children.

Show quote history

The law to have a water bottle on your desk at school? Is it?

Original poster

DameBaggySmith · 15/05/2025 17:07

PensionedCruiser · 15/05/2025 14:45

So there's a child in class, being assessed for ADHD, yawning. The obvious punishment for this child is to withdraw break where he has the opportunity to run around and use up excess energy and take a drink to rehydrate if it is necessary. Sitting in a classroom without using up excess energy and dehydrated is really going to help, especially if he does have ADHD.

That sounds like the teachers who used to keep hyperactive little boys in at lunchtime and deny them PE for not sitting still in lessons. I really thought schools (or teachers) had more knowledge and sense these days. There are far better ways to express disapproval than to impose punishments that make the undesired symptoms of neurodivergent children, worse.

Show quote history

Yes, agree.

OP posts:

Original poster

DameBaggySmith · 15/05/2025 17:08

blubbyblub · 15/05/2025 15:26

At 7 I would have absolutely known if a teacher had rolled their eyes. I was a shy and quiet girl. I would have been mortified so 100% would have recalled that.

Show quote history

Yes, he is a shy 7 year old.

OP posts:

Tripadvisor101 · 15/05/2025 17:08

DameBaggySmith · 15/05/2025 16:36

Definitely not ‘that’ parent and have very rarely contacted school about my children.

And yes, children can know some things but not all things. However he didn't ‘interpret’ an eye roll, he described what happened.

At least I wont spend my days on the internet making assumptions about parents who I know nothing about :)

Show quote history

You've put this on a public forum and then expect not to have an opinion or make assumptions?

Original poster

DameBaggySmith · 15/05/2025 17:26

Tripadvisor101 · 15/05/2025 17:08

You've put this on a public forum and then expect not to have an opinion or make assumptions?

Show quote history

Literally put it a forum asking for an opinion. Keep up.

OP posts:

Mynewnameis · 15/05/2025 18:11

I'd be cross. My neurodivergent kid is quiet and well behaved but finds learning or reading exhausting. It was a notable thing definitely

Ohplesandbanonos · 15/05/2025 18:13

I told school I did not give permission for my ds (diagnosed adhd) to miss break. If he misbehaved then there would be a consequence at home, the teacher would write in his diary or catch me at pick up to let me know. She also let me know when he had a good day so we could celebrate! It worked well because he got his fresh air energy breaks at school so his behaviour didn't deteriorate for that reason but still got consequences - no screen time, removal of privileges, chores etc whatever was proportionate - at home.

It also showed him that school and I worked in partnership to support him

Natsku · 15/05/2025 18:23

Children should not miss breaks except for very good reason, and yawning, no matter how loud, is not a good reason for missing their break.

That said, if it's a one off then just forget about it, sometimes life is unfair. If it starts to be a pattern then talk, very diplomatically, to the teacher to find out what exactly is going on.