Fucked up at work

[DummyRun]

Less than a year into a new job in a high pressure, high stakes industry. There is a culture where everyone is pulled up for the tiniest of mistakes which means I’m constantly anxious. Today I really fucked up by sharing sensitive information to the wrong recipients, making a bad situation much worse.

I know I’m going to have to face the music in the morning and I’m dreading it, although it’s likely nothing on the self-flagellation and guilt I’m already feeling.

Posting because I can’t sleep for the worry. How do I let it go until the morning? Tips on accepting my fate gracefully also welcome.

so sorry you can’t sleep. The worry must be terrible.

My moto is “nobody died”, so if that’s the case then just take it on the chin. You didn’t do it on purpose and mistakes are made.

Try and get some sleep as it will feel worse if you are tired too.

These mistakes happen all the time. What’s the worst that can happen? How likely is it that the worst that can happen actually will? And will you survive if it does? Worrying will only give you something to do. Park that worry here and try to sleep.

Would it make it better if you go straight to the person who will be telling you off and bring it up before they have chance to find you? Gives you a look of genuine remorse, which you clearly do have, that way.

Also remember that in a few weeks this will be forgotten. Everyone makes mistakes.

When my mind is spiralling like this I write a self reflective piece about what happened, why, what can I do to remedy it and any learning . Then just park it. Until you have to explain it to somebody.

get some sleep. !

There’ll be an inevitable post-mortem; if you can acknowledge the mistake early and say ‘look, I’ve had a think about mitigation measures, and I think we should do x and y, plus I commit to putting a system in place to ensure z’ hopegully it will move the conversation on to the ‘what now’ phase.

I still get a small-swear panic over cc’ing rather than bcc’ing an email back in 2002, but I guarantee you I’m the only person awake at 1.20am thinking about it because everyone else (is only glad it wasn’t them) has forgotten.

Onwards with courage!

If it’s any consolation everyone fucks up like this one time or another. Even the people that will be grilling you. Take ownership and treat it as a learning experience. You now won’t do this shit again. IME the more mature and forthright you can be about it the better it will be. Like a pp said nobody died. You didn’t do it intentionally. You’ll be fine. If you’re hauled over the coals out of all proportion then that sounds like the problem is your shitty workplace culture so fuck em.

Everyone fucks up, I liken it to how ice skating is judged. The fall is not considered, the score reflects the recovery from the mistake. Go in today and own the mistake, and set out what you will do to prevent it happening again. The worst approach is evasion or blaming someone else, honesty can be refreshing!

If you haven’t already, I’d suggest getting ahead of this as soon as possible. Own up to whoever needs to know, be accountable but factual (don’t escalate any drama around it). Apologise, suggest anything you can to rectify and be part of the solution until it’s closed. Then clearly outline how you will prevent it happening again and anything you need from your organisation to support that.

In my experience of the many fuckups I've made, the best way is to confess what happened as soon as you can, suggest how you could put it right (if possible) and detail a plan of what you're putting in place so it never happens again.
Good luck!

Admit it and hope for the best

Yes agree with everyone who has said just go and own it to your boss. Did you recall the email straight away? Did you inform your information controller ?

If you search classics on here there’s a thread about worst mistakes you made at work, it’ll make you feel much better. Someone let two armadillos with herpes into the British wild. Or something similar.

"Don't wait for unpleasant disclosures to burst.
If the truth must be told, see you tell it first."

I would perhaps consider looking for another job in due course if there is a toxic blame culture as opposed to a learning one.

We've all been there OP.

I agree with @NigellaAwesome the culture sounds awful.

A supportive boss who has your back is one of the most important elements of a job. Life's too short to be constantly worried about mistakes. Also its rarely as awful as you think it is.