To want to hear stories from people who’ve progressed in their careers without arse-licking, performative niceness, or constant small talk?

[YourNavySnake]

I know the game is often about who you know and how well you can “play along” but has anyone actually made it to a very senior or well-paid role just by being good at what they do, keeping their head down, and staying authentic? I’d love to know it’s possible - even if rare.

I never have (yet)! Because I am too honest 😅. I also don’t want to spend my time with a load of arse lickers so I have focused on not getting myself into that position. You may think I’m lying but honest- as soon as I realised the more senior the more “influencing” is needed, I realised it wasn’t for me.

Depends what you mean by 'performative niceness'.

I've maintained a good steady career at about 3x average salary basically by doing my job. But I like my job, and getting on with people is part of that. I mostly enjoy the company of my colleagues.

You have to get on with people, if only to avoid everyone else having to work in a bad atmosphere, but I haven't had to suck up to anyone. I've had two occasions in 30 years where someone has made themselves so unpleasant that I've chosen to find another job but it has worked to my financial advantage.

Positions on the next step up (board level) are less fun, longer hours and much more cut-throat so I've always declined them. Well paid able lieutenant suits me.

I am a massive success, perhaps because I don't denigrate other people's success as through "arse-licking", which paints the person accusing others of it in a very negative light. Also, my niceness is natural, not performative, and my conversation is sparkling, not small talk.

Maybe just try being a less objectionable colleague?

You have to get on with people, if only to avoid everyone else having to work in a bad atmosphere, but I haven't had to suck up to anyone. I've had two occasions in 30 years where someone has made themselves so unpleasant that I've chosen to find another job but it has worked to my financial advantage.

This

Do you go around calling yourself a “massive success”?

My top tips

• admit your shortcomings
• sell your strengths
• hire great people
• fire shit people quickly
• work with other teams not against them

I’m in science so easier to get promoted on ability. Hard to find higher level jobs that aren’t networking and influencing though.

More often than not, to get the next role you need to be acting up a level, not keeping your head down, and also show that you want what comes with the next level.

Your post screams a total lack of understanding of how people advance and what they do to get there. It's cynical and immature TBH

Only on threads when the OP sets themself up as a bit of an arse.

"Eee, I call a spade a shovel, I would never consider a work colleague as a friend and I only say what I need to to get the job done."

Sorry, not an arse. "Authentic".

I worked bloody hard. I had my daughter at 20, and when she was six months old I was working behind the bar of our local pub at night. I chatted to one of our regulars who worked in the industry I wanted to go into. She offered me a one day a week position, and I worked as hard as I could. Within a year it became three days a week, then full time, then I grafted my arse off for another year, and got my current role at the company I’m with now. I was polite, kind to everyone, made the effort to know everyone from the reception staff to the CEO. Worked hard, stayed late, made sacrifices, and got promotion after promotion until I got to where I am now, a couple of rungs below the top leadership team. I’m facing the choice now of whether I stay where I am, or I jump ship and set up my own company in the same industry

I’m doing okay and am on a decent wage. Not mega bucks but comfortable. I’ve always worked hard and on the whole liked the people I work with so no need to arse lick.

When I didn’t enjoy working with people I moved inwards and upwards. I’m really very lucky that I absolutely love the current team I’m in, and the firm I work for is one of the better ones (yes there’s people at work who grumble, usually earlier in their career stage, and they won’t realise what a lovely firm they’re at until they move elsewhere). Work is what you make it - there’s certainly better paid jobs that I could take but those firms have a much poorer work life balance and I don’t want to spend each weekend working, not still be hard at it at midnight. So I found the best compromise.

It’s possible - just needs a bit of hard work and research as to the type of firm you’re looking at.

if you see the majority of people doing well as arse lickers or whatever it might be a you issue

or your workplace sucks, one of the two

work hard as balls, be interested in stuff, try to be decent to people, has been ok for me so far