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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think men always want what they can’t have?

3 replies

YourTealBalonz · 12/05/2025 19:48

Why is it that the moment you’re not interested, that’s when they seem the most persistent? I’ve had men ignore me when I was polite and friendly but the second I show zero interest, they’re suddenly all over me.

Is this just a classic case of wanting what they can’t have or is there something deeper to it? Has anyone else noticed this?

OP posts:
Dwells · 12/05/2025 21:51

Yeah I've noticed this too I think it might be a combination of things. I think for some guys there is the 'chase', kind of narcissistic really. There's fear of commitment like if you're what they're looking for, the cold feet kick in. I also think some guys might feel inadequate like avoidant attachment types. Then there might just be a difference in what they're looking for eg polite and friendly doesn't sound hugely compatible with mysterious and sexy on the surface at least. Lastly, there could be an element of confirmation bias like we're looking out for this particular pattern of behaviour and therefore seeing it.

MasterBeth · 12/05/2025 22:21

No, I think it is pretty stupid to claim that men "always" do anything. Men are not a homogeneous mass.

TheRhodesian · 27/05/2025 10:50

Men are hunters. They want to conquer and when a challenge arises (your ignorant denial) they try harder to conquer the denial. It's so ego based. The guys whobtry harder are not the ones you should worry about. Its the quiet one who is always nice to you that you should take notice of...
Just saying

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