Really unsure what to do here. I (33) moved into a room in a flat where a mutual friend was living after my 10 year relationship ended. She (30) had lived there 3 years and had had a flatmate for some of that time - but it’s not her flat. She’s just a tenant.
We got on great for over a year. Having wine nights together, girl chat, shopping etc. Hanging out with our mutual friends. Then she got into a relationship really quickly. She went on a date that lasted a whole weekend and then was glued to the guy after that and official with him after just 3 weeks. We stopped hanging out, she stopped asking how I was. She started doing things we’d do together with this guy. I heard from others that she’d stopped bothering with them too. I left her to it until she started increasing the frequency of his overnight stays at our flat. It was 2 times a week but creeping up to 3 with additional dinner visits etc. I tried to nip this I’m the bud by asking if we could have some boundaries around when we both have guests staying over (I was seeing someone also). I suggested twice a week for both of us.
This blew up and resulted in her saying she wished I’d never moved in and that I’m ruining her happiness. She also said she wanted this guy to move into our flat at some point and seemed to think I should move out or let him live with us seeing as she was there first. She said me not allowing this would be keeping them apart. She also brought up the amount of furniture we each had in the flat, highlighting it was mostly hers.
After those comments I felt like a lodger in my own home so made some changes to try and rebalance things - new prints, a bookcase etc. never touching her stuff, just filling in some gaps.
In response she retaliated and started adding more random things like prints etc. She’s also hardly spoken to me since and things are horribly frosty. When I went on holiday, she went in my room and put things in there from the front room (my blanket etc) and turned all my plug sockets off. She has also started buying things we’d previously shared in her room like toilet roll, kitchen roll, washing liquid - there was never a discussion about not sharing these anymore. At one point she also tried to accuse me of causing the bills to be higher because I work from home, with no reference to her boyfriend staying.
Weve got just under a year left on our tenancy but I regret resigning it. I’m so miserable living with her - she’s marches around with a face like thunder and seems to think the flat belongs to her. Everyone is telling me to stand my ground but I’m anxious and down all the time. I’m in a new relationship (6 months in) and am happy with my life otherwise but this girl is bringing me down. What would you do? Part of the reason I stayed was because the rent is dirt cheap, it’s a lovely flat near my friends and family and I’m not sure I could afford to live alone.