To feel really anxious about house move/mortgage increase

[Zippydooda]

Sorry, a bit of a long one!

We have just had an offer accepted on a house that costs £120,000 more than ours. We have £130,000 equity in our house and a current mortgage of £135,000. For the new house we will be borrowing about £260,000 altogether. My husband and I are in our early 40s and have 2 young children, one baby and one preschooler.

We currently pay about £680 per month on our mortgage. The new payments will be £1315 and this is about 27% of our monthly earnings. My husband starts a new job soon where he's had quite a large pay increase which will cover the extra £600 or so. I work part time and the mortgage uses my basic salary for the calculations, no overtime included but I'm on maternity at the moment and not sure I'll be able to do overtime when I go back anyway. Our mortgage term is 27 years anyway so takes us up to nearly 70! My husband is doing pretty well and is working towards a role where he would earn around £85,000 but that will take a few years. I will earn more when the kids go to school but I'm aware they will also cost more!

We want to move because we don't like the town we live in, it's ok, a bit rough but not dangerous but there is not much to do, it's a very small town, the worst in the area and it's a bit depressing as the high street has completely died. Our house is lovely and we have great neighbours - and there's scope to make the house bigger by converting the loft but the house prices in this town in particular mean that we won't make our money back from the cost of doing it so we'd really need to just stay here if we do that. We also have a right of way through our garden which I don't like. My son starts school next year and so I feel we need to move before we have to apply or we will be stuck. There are no good local schools where we currently are and we'd have to drive quite far for a good one (we bought the house before we knew we wanted kids)

The new house is bigger but doesn't feel like it as part of the extra space is outbuildings (already renovated) but it does have 3 bedrooms. It's beautiful and has potential to go in the roof. The garden is small but we already have a small garden. The town is more interesting (but not perfect, but we can't afford to buy a house in a nicer place as it would mean loads more money). There is a bit more for the kids to do and more of a community. Schools are good (better than our current primary definitely). There is also more for me to do, community things to get involved in etc. which I miss where we live as people here are not bothered.

I'm having a wobble because ultimately we are borrowing £130,000 + interest more which I keep thinking we could save for the kids to help them as they get older but then I'm not sure about bringing them up where we live now. I'm also worried about being 40 and having to pay this high until I'm 67. I really don't have much saved for retirement.

We manage pretty well on what we are earning now. We only have 1 car (husband has a works vehicle), are pretty frugal and are saving at the moment (not overpaying mortgage as our savings rates are higher) but I have a rubbish pension and only about £10,000 savings as I only work part time and have generally not been great with money previously. My husband has about £40,000 savings but a chunk of our savings will be used for moving fees. I am on maternity leave now untill October. If we stay here we won't have nursery fees but if we move there is only 1 nursery that takes babies and they charge £170 a month on top of the free hours of childcare.

I keep swinging between being really excited about the potential of moving somewhere a bit better to feeling really anxious that we are over stretching ourselves and that we could just be saving for our children.

Just wondering what everyone else thinks - are we mad for stretching ourselves at our age, or is it worth it for the kids to be somewhere more interesting?

Sounds like you both have room to grow in your salaries and can afford the mortgage. We took a similar move and now ten years later I’m glad we did. It does give you options to build equity in your house and downsize later, the town and schools sound better. Just think for the next five years can we live well here, and are the secondary school options ok? I’d go for it.,

Sounds like a sensible move to me and you've done the due dilligence, enjoy the new home!

Pretty normal thing to be doing at your stage in life and the numbers make sense - especially for 2025

Sounds okay to me. I thought going on the thread title that you were going to describe something much tighter.

Is the right of way just a neighbour or is it a public right of way?

Most High streets are a bit rubbish these days unless in very affluent areas.

We live in quite a deprived area, the actual road we live in is nice but put it this way reform has been sprayed up the local High street and loads of shops are empty. The schools are not great. My DS is on a very competitive degree apprenticeship and told us he has been put forward for an award last night. The school he went to is pretty dire results wise but we knew he would be ok.

I am personally cautious and couldn’t saddle myself with such an extra debt but everyone is different. The saving for your children, what about your retirement over that ? Will it also mean no holidays and money would be an issue if say your kid was invited to a birthday party and you would fret about buying the birthday child a gift. Because there is stretching and then there is living real hand to mouth

I wouldn’t move until he was settled in his new job, how long is the probation period for?

Sounds you'll be fine OP. You're just being anxious about the changes. I would be doo, but looking at it all you will be fine.

I think your move is worth it for the good school reason alone. You’re right you need to move in time to apply for schools from the new address.

The only bit I wouldn’t like is being mortgaged until nearly 70. But you could also downsize before then and clear the mortgage.

I wouldn’t worry so much about helping your children financially when they’re older, concentrate on the near future and the fact they’d be in better schools.

Sounds all perfectly feasible to me. We took on a mortgage into our 70’s purely for money management and cash flow purposes. We overpaid every time it came for renewal and the 10% a year and managed to pay it off in 7 years when we were in our 50’s. Look at it as a more fluid investment and of course a better house for your kids to grow in.

I think you are just having a normal wobble, because objectively it looks like a very sensible move and doesn’t seem like you are overstretching at all!

I think you would probably be better off than most people in your stage of life, but maybe that’s a false view shaped by my experience and lots of MN posts where there is a lot less financial wriggle room.

This sounds a perfectly reasonable move for balanced well thought out reasons.

mine are 10 and 6 now, I let them play in the garden and will wonder off and put washing away etc. I wouldn’t with a public right of way in the garden! Anyone could walk in.

as school age approaches the quality of schools really matter and you also mention more community which you will naturally get more involved in when you are part of the local school community.

dont let the length of mortgage put you off. You are worrying about something years away. It sounds like you can afford repayments. Kids will get free childcare and you can return to work. Over time, perhaps returning to full time. So even if you can’t overpay the mortgage now, you could do in the future.

ensure you are paying into your company pension and enjoy the kids when they are small. It’s cliche but it flies by and you should enjoy it rather than worrying about the mortgage. Enjoy your new house and build a life there

It sounds like a good move to me, especially for the school and better community life.
You will have converted outbuildings that you could maybe use to generate extra income through letting out to visitors / students if you ever needed extra income.
You have a good financial cushion between you & your husband for emergencies.
I wouldn’t worry too much at this stage about saving for your children as the improvement due to your property move will benefit your children in the long run anyway - in giving them a better education, a safe community environment to grow up in and the financial investment in the property in a better area.
Once you are back at work and your children are at school you may be able to increase your part time hours and overpay the mortgage.

We had a major mortgage hike at about 40. It was scary and I was slightly surprised they would lend us that much. 14 years on we are on track to repay a couple of years early. We’ve repaid extra most years and it was definitely the right thing. But it was intimidating at the time.

Thanks everyone!

@SunnyDreamst The town is definitely better where the new house is. The secondary school there is ok but fairly similar to all the schools near us now - not great, not terrible. There is only one better secondary school in the area where my husband can work but it's in a very expensive town which we really can't afford unfortunately. We aren't in the catchment now and also wouldn't be in the new house.

Also our local secondary where we live now was outstanding about a decade ago, is now good but I've heard negative things about it recently but I've heard negative things about all the secondaries in the wider area we have been looking. The local secondary to the new house has a new head arriving in September. I just don't really know how to gauge which would be better when it's still quite a while away.

@CharSiu and @Temporaryname158 it's a right of way for one house next to ours which cuts across our back door. There are new neighbours moving in soon who I don't know. I've always disliked having it though as we have had random people just walking past the back door (usually a gardener or handyman for next door but they don't have to ask, which I knew when we bought the house but I do find awkward) and I worry that someone new might have dogs, or lots of random friends or just really love going through the back so it could potentially be a thoroughfare. Probably over worrying but I am an anxious person!