Neighbours noise affecting sleep constantly

[MorningSunlight]

I am so tired (literally) of thoughtless selfish people disturbing me. On one side of me the neighbour comes home late and bangs around waking me up plus often has loud parties/gatherings at the weekend. On the other side the dog yaps every time someone walks past or just for no reason. Both things are worse this week as I’ve been sleeping with the window open.

My partner lives in a first floor flat and is also disturbed by a noisy inconsiderate neighbour, in addition they smoke weed meaning he can’t even have his windows open.

We’re both so tired after nights of disturbed sleep and neither of us are in a position to move. There’s nothing we can do is there? None of the neighbours are particularly approachable - in fact they’re likely to make more noise on purpose if we complain. I do use earplugs and sleeping tablets but the former are uncomfortable and the latter you’re only supposed to use occasionally.

I don’t think we’re BU to be really fed up, sleep deprivation makes life so much harder than it needs to be.

That sounds miserable for your both. It’s not just the disturbed sleep, it’s the tension of knowing your sleep will be disturbed and waiting for it to happen.

would some kind of white noise plus air con help?

plus - and I am no expert - but maybe some kind of meditation or something to help you when it happens? So you don’t get wound up and might be able to get back to sleep better?

Best thing you can do is just get noise cancelling headphones or other things you can control like fans or aircon or sound proof because otherwise you just obsess over crap behaviour when they won't change. All it does is make you stressed.

There are sleep bands which are comforting for sleeping with wireless headphones built in. Worth a go.

I live in my earbuds and awful lot.

My sympathies, inconsiderate neighbours are the worst. You say you use earplugs but have you tried wax ones? I have noisy neighbours too and sleep really well with wax earplugs (Quies from Amazon) I don't feel them at all. I also take a magnesium tablet at night and this helps me sleep too.

It’s not just the disturbed sleep, it’s the tension of knowing your sleep will be disturbed and waiting for it to happen.

you just obsess over crap behaviour when they won't change. All it does is make you stressed.

Thank you for getting it - it’s exactly this. One neighbour doesn’t live here the whole week and it’s much better when they aren’t around for a day or two but I’m tense every time I come home wondering if their car will be there and if they’re going to kick off 🙄

I’ve just unearthed my fan and my Alexa is constantly on playing background noise but what frustrates me is that I shouldn’t have to do any of it.

Those are the best ones I’ve found but I still find them uncomfortable and I don’t like the sensation of shutting out the world - I want to listen to music or the birds singing, not the idiots around me. It also makes me feel vulnerable as I live alone.

I take sleeping tablets due to inconsiderate people at my old address

Current address has a barky ddog nd but am in cahoots with the council about that.
I suggest you start a complaint also
..

I hate the “get ear plugs” replies because although they would help, it’s unfair that you have to do that for peace in your home.
I wish councils would do more to help, but I think these days they would be inundated with people needing them to help if they could do something because being inconsiderate seems to be the norm now.
I find with these types fighting fire with fire sometimes helps. Be noisier yourself so either you end up irritating them or they might realise how easily the noise travels and you can come to a compromise.

Listen to 'sliced bread' on R4 today (12.30). All about sleep bands or ear phones or ear buds which are comfortable to wear in bed and listen. But I understand feeling vulnerable if alone and not being able to hear 'important' noises when you are asleep.

I bought a soundbar, which is basically a slim speaker that goes under your pillow and you can listen to music/podcasts/meditation or whatever. Much more comfortable than earphones and you can set the timer on the app to switch it off after a certain amount of time. Worth looking at.

Ohh can you recommend one please? I was looking at them and couldn't find one with a good review

The one I have is from a company called Dusker, it’s called a Sleepbar. I can hear it clearly through one pillow, they don’t work through 2 pillows. (And there is a bit of sound leakage to be aware of if you sleep with a partner.) I find it very relaxing to listen to something if menopausal anxiety is keeping me awake.

I feel for you. My neighbours were like this, just so loud, slamming the gate, slamming their door, kids always screaming. It was a nightmare for 3 years and they finally moved. We instantly felt relief as soon as they left. No advice, just seendong support. With the dog you may be able to approach them (although I doubt they'll care) or report it? People are so selfish.

I am so sorry that you are going through this and you are right it sucks that there is no real support for people who have noisy and inconsiderate neighbours. It is a mild form of PTSD. Never knowing when the next round of noise will begin.

Top advice would be to move as in all honesty that is the only solution or hope that they move. If this is not an option, start researching noise cancelling headphones both over ear and in ear. You can connect to the TV/music, which can help to drown out most of the noise. I also used to keep myself busy so I could get out of the house and away from the noise.

Do you have any leeway with the floorplan of your house? Could you move furniture against the walls to lessen sound leaking from the neighbours.

Completely agree, I think it’s just another example of how selfish people have become, it’s really depressing.