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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is my 6yo being unreasonable?

27 replies

Username06 · 30/04/2025 17:13

My DD6 has decided she doesn't want to kiss people anymore, fair enough I don't like close physical contact with people either 🤣 it took me a few days to not do it out of habit and she will give me one before bed occasionally as and when she decides, I don't ask. She is still affectionate with cuddling etc.
Her dad and a couple of other family members think it's odd and have used lighthearted bribery to try entice a kiss e.g I won't buy you things if you don't give me a kiss, her dad will say you don't love me if you won't kiss me. She doesn't seem to care what they say but surely this is a non issue and they should just respect what she wants.

I think they are being slightly childish and if she doesn't want to kiss anyone it's completely her choice and she is not being unreasonable is she?

OP posts:
Ellepff · 30/04/2025 19:32

Your instincts are right!

Will it help if you voice a plan so she doesn’t have to? When it is time to say goodbye to family I always say overly loudly to my kids “you can choose to kiss goodbye or handshake or high five or fist bump (except for the 80yo- she needs a handshake or hug).” I think it helps take the boundary off the kid and make the adults reflect on it, plus showing respect/manners.

Your DH is a much much bigger problem.

carly2803 · 30/04/2025 21:07

no she is not unreasonable - listen to her and back her up

I always ask my kids "can i have a cuddle/kiss you on the cheek", now they are older and understand its their body/feelings and they might not want a cuddle and thats perfectly ok!

sometimes I do not either!

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