I will try and keep it short.
Long term friendship of 9+ years. Sometimes we will see each other weekly, others we may go a year+ without meeting up (due to kids, work, life!) We always share major life events even though sometimes it may take them a while to reply - a few days to a week. I only mention the reply delay because as I’m an “instant replier” to everyone (if I don’t reply NOW I will forget and never reply 🤣) so there could be a conflict in approaches and I don’t want to drip feed.
Last year we went through a “close phase” talking, texting and meeting regularly. They were sharing about some tricky elements of their life (marriage issues, child struggling with mental health due to exams and work stresses. They felt like there wasn’t one part of their world that wasn’t causing stress). They said I was very supportive and they didn’t know what they would do without my listening ears etc. These issues seem to have increased since Christmas to the extent that they will say they will call at X time/day and then won’t. Or will say something like “life is crazy will send a longer message later” and then complete silence for weeks until I message again. When I do speak to her it is clear they are overwhelmed and struggling. Since Easter I have sent two very low pressure “Hope you are ok” type messages and haven’t received a reply.
I did some reading on the internet about how to support friends who withdraw when they are overwhelmed and struggling, but I am a “sharer” so this is all very alien to me. I wondered if you wonderful ladies had any ideas?
Just to add that we have tickets to a concert in a couple of weeks. I haven’t raised this and don’t want to incase it adds pressure. I would love to go with her but could find someone else. However, I don’t want to mention it at all as I think it adds pressure which I’m not sure they could cope with right now.