Feeling stressed and overwhelmed with feelings about how life is none stop

[Orangeandpinknails]

Starting to feel really pissed off and overwhelmed with how hard it is trying to stay professional I'm a career and being a mum.

I work full time 9-5 Mon to Fri and my partner works full time afternoon to evening shifts, we have no family or friends to help out with childcare. I have just started a new job (a sort of realistic dream job for me personally) been there 5 weeks and today my child was sent home from school sick.

Work were ok but didn't seem best pleased. My child has also started getting hospital appointments for a hearing problem and it looks like there will be a few more coming up over the next few months. I really wanted to make a good impression with work as wanted to try and work my way up. My partner has also had lots of time off in past as we try and share time off when she's poorly. She has started asking for me when she's poorly and we both really want to attend all the hearing appointments with her because we're both her parents at the end of the day. Having a child and being there for them is the most important thing to me but I cannot afford to not work full time.

I feel so guilty everytime I have to send her to afterschool club/holiday club but I can't think what other options I have. She is only 4 and I feel like I'm missing out on her :( I feel this anger inside when I have to tell work I need to leave and I can tell they are disappointed. What are we supposed to do as working parents with no other support 😕.

I'm just feeling so stuck and torn and feel like I'll never be able to make a good impression in a job and then it makes me angry thinking why aren't jobs more understanding. It's like they always expect you to have someone else they can go to and don't believe when you day you don't.

You're choosing the wrong companies/organisations to work for. My organisation is really flexible and they don't mind if my kids are ill. Could you look into other companies/ organisations in your industry that are family flexible? Do you not have the option to wfh in emergencies or is it not that sort of a job?
Hearing your mum guilt made me feel a bit sick because I'm going to be working my part time and studying part time from September so I'll be putting my kids in wraparound childcare for more days and I know what that guilt is going to feel like. The world we live in has changed though and working full time seems pretty normal for a lot of mums, unless their partner is in a high paying role.
I would explain to your employer upfront about the hearing appointments. I don't necessarily think you both need to be there on every one. My youngest had a limb deformity and has had lots of hospital appts and a few surgeries, we have always split the appts between us and written notes to debrief the other person. It works fine and means neither of us is getting any flack at work.
I'm just throwing out ideas anyway. Feel free to ignore if they don't work for your family.

Aww thank you @DollydaydreamTheThird I really appreciate your reply.. I just needed a rant..I will be able to work from home eventually maybe 1 day a week but I don't think I'll be able to choose the day. I think if what you're doing is part time you will be ok👍 x

Maybe it’s not the right workplace for you? My job can be flexible, I can mostly manage my diary and if my kid was sick they’d cover my work…but I also stay late when I can and pick up other peoples slack. Both you and your husband shouldn’t miss work for an appointment though; you need to be building up good will. It takes time in a new job.