To ask if you’ve ever left a relationship without a word?

[TheDenimFox]

Have you ever just walked away from someone - whether a friend, partner, or even a job - without explaining why? No argument, no closure, just silence.

If you have, what made you do it? Did you feel guilty or was it the only way to handle the situation? And if it’s happened to you, how did you feel being on the receiving end?

Is ghosting ever justified or is it always a coward’s way out?

No. Because I'm an adult who can use her words.

An ex said ‘you’re acting like you don’t want to be with me’, I said ‘I don’t’ and walked out.

That was it, after 7 years of emotional and occasional physical abuse, that’s what it came down to.

I have, because I knew if I said anything I'd get punched in the mouth. He went on a course with work. I pretended on the phone everything was normal. By the time he returned I was long gone. I blocked his number on the day he was due back.

There was a thread or two by a poster called Running in the rain, her partner/boyfriend texted her saying ‘it’s over, no need to text’ or something so she never did.

And ages ago when people wrote blogs, I read one where she came home from work one day to find he’d moved out and taken every single thing that was his, furniture included. She was devastated obviously, and it was a long time before she dated again as I recall.

Ghosting is cruel. I’ve had it done to me with no warning and for no apparent reason. It’s a spineless and immature way to behave.
As an adult I always give at least an explanation when I leave. It’s basic respect.

I think it could easily be justified where it's an abusive relationship and the leaving party is scared of the other partner's reaction and might be at risk from them. Very sensible in that situation.

With a job, don't think I've ever "explained why" - just put my resignation in. Reasons aren't required. Sometimes they ask in an exit interview, sometimes not.

Less close friends - not exactly without a word, but where I've brought something up and it's not been received well or the problem behaviour hasn't changed, I have sometimes then just distanced myself without explicitly saying "This thing was a problem to me and you're still doing it so I need to not be as close with you now".

I've never done it with a relationship or a close friend - I feel like in those cases I would want the closure and clarity on my side, and also that it's more reasonable to the other.

I've been on the receiving end of it - with friends it's mostly been nothing to do with me - they've had big things going on in their own lives and needed to isolate themselves from everyone to deal with the trauma or stress. And then they've come back later, sometimes months later and explained, and it's been fine.

With a relationship, I found it really traumatic for him just to disappear. I know it was his own maladaptive coping mechanism, but it was very difficult given he'd been saying he loved me and wanted us to live together just a week or so before. But he was a very emotionally driven person and got overwhelmed with feelings very quickly, plus he'd previously done the silent treatment when we had had arguments, so I wasn't entirely surprised by it. Still hurt massively at the time though.

My sis came home one day to find her dp had emptied the house. She never heard from him again.

In my early 20s, 2 relationships - 1 I left his when he punched a door after an argument with his mum, I never returned. He knew as he text over and over saying ‘I’m not always like that’ ‘I was just angry’

the 2nd I found out he had cheated on me; through absolute chance, we were at a large birthday party when I found out (I think a friends 21st) I’d had suspicions. I left in a taxi, never told him where I was going etc, he never chased.

Both times I lived alone so had my own place to go back to, and they were early relationships.

I was ghosted by a long distance partner in January after years of being friends and then something more. All those years and then one day it was like I just didn’t exist. Was one of the most hurtful things anyone has ever done to me. I still can’t understand it and never will. It’s made me think he never cared about me at all and when I think back to our relationship I don’t think of all the lovely times we had, I only remember the ghosting and how little respect he obviously held for me and that’s what I’ll always remember. If anyone is thinking of ghosting they should think long and hard about how they’ll be remembered in that relationship for ever more. Even writing this I’m still shocked

Ghosted by someone I considered a close friend about a month ago. So I’ve decided I won’t try to reach out now. And if she does try to get in touch I won’t be available to respond now. I’ve had enough and when I look back it’s been me keeping the friendship going over the years and I’m sick of it now. Clearly I was wrong about how close we were.

Ghosted by a man I was in a relationship once. Funnily enough he reaches out about once a year and has done for years. I think he likes to just remind me he’s alive. But then he’d proposed to me and a short while later I found out I was OW and he’d just proposed to his gf (who he had told me was his ex). Odd as I’d met his friends and family. He just gets “I’m fine thanks. Take care”. I don’t say anything more, and that’s just because I’d feel rude not to say anything.

I don’t have it in me to just ghost someone. I’d rather send a message explaining why I need to step away and wishing them the best for the future. It feels childish to just ghost (unless you’re in a potentially threatening situation then I totally understand that would be the safest option).

I remember that!

My mum did recently, she left her narcissistic husband whilst he was at work back in January. She moved everything she owned out of the house and never looked back and she hasn’t said a word to him. Took 7 years but she finally did it!

Yes but for good reason; he woke me up in the middle of the night to be violent. I went very quiet the next morning then walked.

I found out he was cheating on me or at least attempting to.. I contacted the other party involved to let them know of my existence, immediately blocked him on everything and never spoke to him again. I didn't need to hear his excuses 🤷‍♀️
Thankfully we didn't live together or it would've been more difficult..

Yes to be honest, I think it’s actually called ghosting. Not to make excuses but I think my reasons were anxiety, I struggled to communicate how I feel and didn’t want to hurt the other person, I know what I did was probably worse though. Yea it’s also happened to me and it’s not nice, I wish the person was honest but I guess the at my karma

Sometimes walking away is the kindest thing all round