AIBU Inconsiderate Neighbours

[devma]

I’ve lived in my house for 5 years or so now and my neighbours moved in a little after I did.

They are a literal nightmare but not enough for me to really think i’m being reasonable.

My neighbours ex partner, and the father to her kids lived with her until a year ago. When he lived here they were constantly arguing, screaming, shouting and making the kids cry with their exchanges. The sort of arguments that have everyone hanging out of their windows in disbelief.

Her ex used to sit smoking cannabis playing obnoxiously crap and loud music in the garden til late in the summer months when it was warm through the night and I had no choice but to close my childrens bedroom windows due to it keeping them awake.

Her youngest (1/2 years old) was allowed roaming around the cul de sac with his then 4 yesr old sister til late with no supervision and this still happens. They draw on peoples drives and sit around peoples cars, throw stones etc.

The most recent turn of events after the dad to the three children moved out is her moving a different man in and situations being worse than ever.

Her older daughter ran away from home, around 60+ miles away from where we live around a week ago (she is 10Y/O), the younger two are roaming the streets until 9/10pm without parents in sight, they are sitting ontop of their shed and crawling along a 12ft stone wall and drawing on the neighbours brickwork on their garage and climbing on their roof tiling and pulling on the tiles and its only a matter of time before one of them falls and seriously, seriously hurts themselves.

The shed is directly next to my fence so I feel as though I cant spend time in my garden, they are looking into my house and being generally loud and a nuisance. Topping this they “bark” at my dog to wind him up, further making me feel as though I cant do what I want to in my garden.

I’m literally sick of them but I feel like I cant say anything.

Thoughts?

Call the police. A lot. And social services.

How do you know where the daughter ran off to?

Social Services

Call the police or social services/mash/their school every time and get other neighbours involved doing the same thing. Exhibit faux concern if you think it'd come back on you negatively I.e. lost kids, noise on the roof/shed must be a burglar etc

Although of course it is concerning. Sad

Was on our local police page on Facebook that she was missing, once found it was shared on the community page as to where she was located. Theres always police next door but during this occurrence they were there often (and we now know why)

I think this is a better move, it is a worrying thought knowing they have little input at home and they’re being a nuisance but additionally they’re at risk of harm.

Sounds very similar to my ndn. V young kids roaming around unsupervised, a 5 year old walking down a v busy A road unsupervised, going missing twice, constantly arguing. When the original couple separated for a period it got even worse and we ended up phoning the police a couple of times for domestic violence.

I started reporting concerns to school, they were at same as my ds. However after another drama and fall out with one of the other school mums, things went very quiet, kids never out unsupervised, much less arguing etc. The kids also changed school.

I suspect some kind of SS intervention. It went from the kids being out til 10/10.30 pm every day (young primary aged, youngest is 4 now) to now they are only on the enclosed garden or supervised by one of them.

I did speak to the headteacher and said I wasn't sure what to report or if I even should. He reassured me that I should report everything I was concerned about, that it wasn't my job to decide what was worth reporting and that everything is relevant if it's important enough for me to question. And that sometime I might only see one thing, someone else something different and someone else something different again. But that the more information they had, the better they can ensure the children's safety.

I also reported a couple of incidents to the HA as anti social behaviour.

Anyway, about 6 months after the first report I made, as I said they calmed right down and are relatively quiet now.

I don’t know why you’ve not called social services before to be honest?

Sounds incredibly similar. They’re very problematic and the childrens behaviour and the parents lack of care is worrying. I think if nothing else it would be worth mentioning, they are obviously now known to the police too through the daughter running away so may be worth them digging deeper as a whole.

we have issues with another neighbour up the way with her dog defecating on peoples driveways too so it feels like i’m living in hell at the moment. Im very quiet and hard working, single parent to two but I have severe anxiety/ stress so when I come home from work the last thing I need is that😥

I wasnt sure if I was just being overly sensitive 😓

I'd have to move house if possible. They all sound feral

I desperately want to, its a constant source of stress for me 😞

We lived with something very similar OP, and in the summer holidays it was absolute hell! The 6 kids next door amused themselves by throwing stones at my new car, kicking footballs at my windows, going into the woods at the back of our house, and climbing up the fence to look over at us while we had our meals. Then when they were tired of doing that, they would throw things over to wind up our dog. They also ran wild around the estate where we lived, making absolutely everyone miserable. One night I drove home at 9.30 at night, and spotted the youngest one, aged around 18 months, climbing into a cement mixer, I was horrified and worried that she could pull it down on top of her, but was too scared, after past experiences with the mother, to even go and tell her what she was doing. I got to a point, where if I saw the kids in the road, while I was in my car, I fantasized about putting my foot down, they had literally driven me crazy, week in, week out. We all thought that this torture would never end, but then, right out of the blue, a 'For Sale' board went up outside their house. We didn't think for a minute they would be able to sell the place, as we all imagined it would be a right shit tip, but to our amazement they did, and when they finally moved out, we actually had a street party to celebrate their departure.