To think primary transition days aren’t much help if you work?

[Transitiondays]

Arghh. Three primary transition days, two with pick ups at midday and one full day but obviously finishing around three. I’m guessing this is standard but very difficult to manage!

Talk to your employer. Transition days are very common, and employers will have dealt with this before.

If you really can't take time off then your DC can't go, but how are you going to cope with a poorly child who needs to be collected at mid-day. Do you have a backup carer because you will need one.

But a school setting is very different to a nursery. It’s still a big change and one schools know is easier for most children if they have had the chance to visit on a couple of occasions during summer term to prepare and get to know key adults a bit.

@Spies , next year they’ll be able to use the wraparound care on days I work; this year they obviously can’t as they aren’t yet attending the school. I’m not sure if it is standard or not as I don’t work in a primary school but ours has five transition days for the children starting reception in September and they are in June and July. Incidentally I have also adjusted my working hours for next year but again this won’t kick in until September. So it does make the transition days difficult to manage.

No doubt they will have childcare arranged for the not al school day.

The problem with the ‘settling in’ is that it might just be mornings, or alternate days etc - which is far more difficult (and expensive) to organise childcare around if also trying to work full time.

And taking two weeks off then means a bigger problem covering the rest of the school holidays.

You've been given plenty of notice because they know some parents need time to get things organised. You have a right to additional parental leave precisely to help with this kind of thing. A gradual introduction to school is what is most beneficial to the child. Out of yourself, the child's father, and 4 grandparents, surely at least one of the six of you can rearrange normal commitments for a couple of weeks as a one-off opportunity to ensure the child's launch into academic endeavour is a positive experience?

It’s not visiting a few times during the summer term though, it’s ’settling in’ often over a period of weeks doing half days, random days in the week etc in September that’s the problem.

Can they go to their usual childcare before/after? So you’re just having to manage the drop-off/pick-up assuming their childcare provider doesn’t offer this?

We are in a village so most kids were going to the same school, bar three or four, so nursery staff took the kids to the school, stayed with them, and then took them back to nursery for the rest of the day.

The problem is that I work in a school myself so I have no flexibility for days like this (ironic I know …)

One of the days happens on a day I don’t work as I am part time so that is fine; on another I do work and my employer is somewhat inflexible about things like this so I don’t think I’m going to get anywhere asking. DH may be able to do one but for another it clashes with a very big event that is abroad and has been booked for months.

My point is are you actually sure there will be space in the wrap around provision. It's not uncommon to find there is no space once they actually start the school.

If it's days in the summer term then between you and their dad I'm sure you can arrange some time off to accommodate the days. Even with a change in hours next year you'll likely need to take time off at some point for illness.

After having embarrassed myself by showing I didn’t read the OP, I can say that the staggered start to Reception is really useful for several reasons.
‘It gives the child a chance to spend a short time in class rather than a full day, which can be pretty overwhelming.
It gives the teachers the opportunity to spend some 1:1 time with each child - in their first couple of weeks the children will be screened against a baseline and it’s often here that any concerns are spotted. Our EYFS lead does a speech and language screening and sends off referrals to SALT, which means the child can be seen in the Autumn term. She would struggle to do this in a timely manner if she had all 30 children in at once.
I appreciate that it’s often challenging on parents to manage this staggered start, and in reality of a child is 5 the school has to have them in full time legally, but where possible, transition should be staggered to ensure the best start possible.

That is a lot especially if then you have two weeks of settling in at the beginning of term. it potentially could be three weeks of leave needed.
Have you made friends with anyone local who's going to the school so that you can share the days with?

It is difficult. My DH and I are both teachers so very difficult to manage one-off days that don't fit in with your normal routine (things like after-school club aren't available for transition days). Can you try to arrange a bit of flexibility with your employer for your child to attend at least one?

Thankfully our school doesn’t do this, but they are doing transition days in the summer term which is a lovely idea, it’s just I’m not sure we can do them!

It’s your child starting school some kids are ok some find it difficult you and your family the dad or grand parents find a way to MAKE IT WORK. It’s for your child.
use AL arrange to WFH. Even half days back at nursery.
children get v tired starting school as well so be warned. Also how are you going to manage school finish at 3.20 and school holidays - I think you need to start thinking about that now especially if you find these things tricky with work.

Snap: ironic isn’t it?

We moved areas just before DDs started reception so they didn't do transition days and it didn't adversely affect them really. (Dd1 actually missed the while if September). They are a nice to have, not an essential. DD2 actually did them for the wrong school as she was in the preschool class and she was the only one leaving.

So don't overly worry if you can't manage them.

You can actually ask for unpaid parental leave precisely for situations like this.
https://www.gov.uk/parental-leave

It's the different environment with all new adults that can be overwhelming, not the length of the day per se.

That’s a good idea about asking other parents if you’re friendly. I’d happily have taken another kid along with DD1 if parents were struggling.

Chilcare is based around the assumption of a complete school day. You can't leave a 4 year old hanging around for a few hours until the after school club provision starts at 3pm which would be a likely arrangement when the child has started at the school.

Presumably OP already has childcare such as nursery, but that doesn't transfer to covering the gap of picking a child up from a different venue halfway through the day.

Does the school drag out "phased entry" in September too? That's disruptive to children and parents. Fortunately I wasn't working when school brought that in, and DS2 was more than ready for whole school days and the upheaval of different finishing times had no benefits to anyone. (They should be optional for children who do need more time to adjust, not compulsory)

That sounds better.

But yes - still difficult to manage.

TBH childcare in general is just massively more complicated once they’re at school (sorry).

I used to be a childminder. I quite often just had children for their Primary School transition days. I'd take them and collect them and they'd be at my house until their parents/grandparents etc could collect.

You need to start planning now OP. This is different from nursery now. You're going to have transition days, inset days, school holidays, child off sick days to make arrangements for.

You need a plan such as a friend who can share covering these with you, paid childcare, annual leave, more flexible working, other family helping (the father, grandparents?).

What you don't do is just not take your child to school when it doesn't suit you. That approach really isn't going to work.

I’m not sure why I’m being sternly lectured about putting things in place for September when I already have. However, these days aren’t happening in September and as such the adjusted work hours and the wraparound that I’ve put in place for September aren’t going to be present in June and July.

Likewise, I’m not going to be an indefinite SAHM because I may have unwell child once or twice a year. Incidentally, DS is very rarely ill and I have only had to leave work to collect him from nursery once.

At present, DH works from home Monday and Friday so can manage that. I don’t work Tuesdays or Wednesdays so can manage that and as from next year won’t be working Thursday afternoon either. Guess which day the transition mornings are on? Couldn’t really make it up. Shouting at me to ‘make it work’ isn’t helpful if we genuinely can’t. I will of course try but it might be he missed a couple.

I agree...although something is fine, it shouldn't be to the extent that it is.

It's not so much the pre- starting ones for me, but the staggered ones when they actually start for good. Thankfully my school's was over a short period. I think it's outrageous that some schools do it over 2 weeks...if that was necessary then all schools would do it.

I am happy to take views from those who genuinely know there's a benefit for children, however I just think it's a historical thing from when children didn't do so much nursery and things just haven't moved with the times. I don't know any child who didn't do at least 9-12 every day in nursery pre-school already and most children I know do a lot more than that.

I think what is ridiculous is that, by taking time off to facilitate this it means that DH and I have less A/L to use in school holidays. This means more holiday club for DS. He would much rather have done a full day when starting school and less holiday club.

I say his as someone who has made sacrifices in my job in order to benefit DS to do all school pickups and it feels like this still wasn't good enough!

One thing I do remember is that the teacher did home visits during this time though, which I guess needed to be navigated somehow.

It's a big assumption that there are still 4 grandparents and that they all live within a commutable distance from school. My dad is dead so my daughter has already lost 1 grandparent and my husband's parents live in a different city. So that would leave me with 1 grandparent (thankfully retired so can and does help where she can!)