Would you ask friend to stop saying this?

[Cofcake]

Since I broke up with my ex a couple of years ago, a friend of mine whom I meet every month or so, constantly brings up how I need to meet someone else, can't understand when I say I'm not interested, I'm happy being single again, have a fulfilled life, but she wants me to try online dating, has suggestions about how I can meet someone, how I'll be lonely in old age. I laughed it off again last week when she brought it up but inside felt really annoyed.

She goes from one relationship to the next and can't be on her own and can't understand me being happy single.

Do I say something? She brings it up every time we meet.

I would aks why she is so desperate for a man, if she has one i would ask does she want another? And to stop obsessing about other people's life

I would say she has some deep issues going on, like people who need others to be on the same diet as them

She's invalidating you. She doesn't give you credit for knowing your self and making your own life choices. She isn't even trying to grasp that people are different, she's pushing you to be the same as her despite the fact that you've explained you don't want what she wants.

I suggest you tell her she's invalidating you and ask her to stop doing it. Tell her that if she can't respect the way you live your life, she's a bad friend.

Hope she gets it! Good luck.

Tell her to stop talking about your life because you’re happy and fulfilled and don’t need a man by your side.

Yes, I would say to her it’s very annoying, I am happy as I am.

Tell her that being single, independent and happy is a life skill and maybe she should give it a go.

A relationship should simply be an enhancement to your world, not a panicky scrabble to find yourself a crutch because you think you’ll fall over without one.

The fact she can’t imagine anyone being happy without a man is just her projecting her own insecurities onto you. You can’t really be that blunt about it, but you can be more direct about shutting the subject down immediately every time she raises it, and emphasising that you’re happy as you are.

Do it every single time and just move the conversation on - she’ll soon realise it’s a dead end, although I imagine she’ll switch to being ‘concerned’ and pitying you. When people aren’t comfortable in their own skin, being alone is so scary they can’t comprehend why anyone would actively choose to be!

Exactly 💯

she wants me to try online dating, has suggestions about how I can meet someone, how I'll be lonely in old age.

She is projecting onto your, her own insecurities. Tell her and tell her firmly that you are not her, you are you. And if she continues, then I'd be stepping away.

I’d say ‘Jenny, Jenny, Listen to me! I love being on my own. I genuinely do. Out of all the humans I’ve ever met in my life, do you know who my favourite is to spend time with? Me! Fucking me Jenny! If someone crops up who I like in a few years, I may possibly consider giving them some of my precious time. But if you think I’m touting myself around on dating apps with all the other desperados desperate for a shag then think again. It’s really not my bag.

Thanks, everyone. Everytime I meet her she says it and I have to keep repeating I'm happy as I am. Maybe I'll have to be a little more blunt!

I’ve got a mate like that. She means well but she’s always trying to fix me up with random blokes.

I just said to her that I appreciate she’s happier with a partner but I’m very happy single and want to stay that way.. if we’re out and she points out a man I just say ‘no thanks’ and change the subject

Next time she starts.
Tell her its getting boring now let's talk about something else.

I would find this so tedious I'd seriously reduce contact or not see her at all.
You clearly can't have a great deal in common with her if her only focus in life is finding a man - and being so obsessed she attempts to brainwash friends into adopting similar behaviour.
why waste time with someone who is so desperate for a shag?

for some reason it posted that twice

Just say strop talking about it, unlike you I am happy to be on my own. Next time you mention it I will just be leaving

After a particularly horrible boyfriend in my late teens/early twenties I was totally single for around 7 years. It was the best thing I ever did and I had lots of fun, concentrated on what I wanted to do and I didn’t even bother with casual flings. Just needed an absolute break and was very content. Then when I was 28 I met my husband and have been happily married for 26 years. After the crappy boyfriend, it made me realise I didn’t want to bother unless someone was really worth it. I would be very blunt with your friend and explain you don’t need validation from being with someone, but when/if you find the right person, she’ll be the first to hear.

We are due to meet again soon for a swim so I'll be trying to say it nicely. Out of all my family and friends, she's the only one that says this to me

This! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼😁

Even being blunt will probably pass her by if she just doesn’t understand it.
Put it into context for her - Look, not everyone is the same! You want to be in a relationship and are happy to search for the next one if/when one breaks down. I’m not you! I want to be single, at least for a while.
Please stop asking me to be you. I never ask you to be me!