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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it was not an overreaction to call the police?

589 replies

hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:12

We were out today at a family event. We were parked up in the car park of the venue and were getting in our cars to travel home. There was a man parked next to us in the (relatively narrow) bays, window down, chatting to his girlfriend. He was there when we came out and approached our car.

DD age 8 was getting into the back passenger side of our car, so on the same side as his car. I was on the other/driver’s side. As I was getting in, I heard DD start to scream. Basically the man next to us had started to move his car forward and his back wheel had run over the back of her ankle/foot.

I immediately ran round the back of the car, picked her up, helped her into the back seat and took her shoe and sock off to have a look. The top layer of skin had come off and it looked bruised so I went round to his car, said sorry, I think you have hurt her so I am going to need your details.

He and his girlfriend then said ‘Why? I haven’t done anything wrong’. I asked if he was refusing and he said he ‘didn’t even know what happened’ and started mouthing off.

So, I called 999 and of course the second he heard I was on the phone to the police, he started offering his details.

Two police cars then attended. DH is furious with me and says I completely overreacted as DD’s injury was minor (scrapes and bruises) and I ‘see the worst in everyone’. I am very upset about his lack of support when our child was hurt and upset.

FWIW I would never move my own car when a child was down the side and if I had ever done anything like this I certainly wouldn’t be mouthing off at the parent of the injured child!

So, was it an overreaction to call the police?

OP posts:
Tbrh · 27/04/2025 08:11

myplace · 26/04/2025 17:21

He ran into a child and was going to happily drive off. I think it was a police issue. What did they say? They were quick….

I would say when things are calm you need to chat to your DH about his fear of causing a fuss. Mine is the same. It meant I was afraid to go out if the dc were ill as I didn’t trust him to recognise an emergency.

This. I think maybe in hindsight you didn't need to call the emergency number, but given your child just got their foot run over, the person is trying to leave and your husband is a useless piece of shit, I'm not surprised your adrenalin was going. Hope your daughter is ok.

Shmee1988 · 27/04/2025 08:17

hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 17:27

This is all very interesting and food for thought! The dispatcher said it was very much a police matter and they were there in minutes. I’m not sure what calling a non emergency would achieve where I had an injured child and the other driver refusing to provide details?

Tell that to the woman whose husband is dying of a heart attack or the mother of a toddler choking on a grape, they can't be seen as no available ambulance but at least one was there to tend to your daughters grazed ankle.....

Police, yes at a push.. ambulance no way! All you needed was his reg.

ArtTheClown · 27/04/2025 08:18

We pay enough taxes, we're entitled to use public services despite bizarre efforts on MN to gatekeep them for "emergencies".
Some of the advice I've seen on here would have resulted in sick people's deaths, had they listened and not gone to A&E.

You needed the police in that moment, not at some later point, which is what 999 is for.

EmotionallyConstipated · 27/04/2025 08:23

How did your daughter get on at the hospital, OP?
I'm assuming that if the accident happened as you've seen on the CCTV, you've had her poor foot checked out.

ThisWOMANWontWheesht · 27/04/2025 08:23

DiaryofaProvincialLady · 27/04/2025 00:46

Wrong. The despatcher told OP it was a "police matter" NOT that it was a 999 matter. A subtle but very important distinction which 99% of posters on here are not getting.

The despatcher made this statement because OP told the despatcher her child had been "run over". This was also wrong - the child had been grazed by a car wheel passing her heel.

It was a 101 "police matter" NOT a 999 "police matter".

Show quote history

Oh, we have an eye-witness who was also party to the phone call here, everyone 🙄

What a ridiculous post. How the heck do you know what anyone said or why? And if the dispatcher didn’t think it an emergency, why did they send police officers immediately?

AlwaysGotAnOpinion · 27/04/2025 08:35

hottubwhocares · 26/04/2025 19:49

I’ve actually just seen the footage and it shows that she was very near his car (going round the side of the door which was ajar) and he did indeed run over her foot/ankle when he moved, which then becomes trapped under his car. As she screams he stops and she pulls/tugs her foot/ankle out - there is a sudden movement by her which I assume is what broke the skin.

It’s made my blood run cold. She could have been dragged under his car

Eugh this is terrifying. Made me think I need to make sure both kids are in the car before I get in, especially around other cars, seemingly not moving!i

i would have rang 999 in my panic and rage too.

EveryDayisFriday · 27/04/2025 08:35

Kittyfluff · 27/04/2025 07:37

Riiight.

According to a large number of responding posters, it's okay to run a child over if you have a penis and only run the kid over a little bit. A licence plate is enough because nobody ever drives someone else's car/is under the influence of toxic substances/is driving illegally either. Plus it's OP's fault anyway because OP didn't bodyguard the child into the car. Got it. All wrong in any situation is done by the women present. I take it the police call handler was also in the wrong because she has boobs too.

Either there's a lot of men on here or a lot of women really hate other women.

It really isn't down to sexism 🙄. Although this being MN I can see why you think that. It was the parents responsibility to ensure their child was safely in the car, Mother and Father in this instance. The girls foot must have been very close to a moving car which is dangerous as proven. She's 8 and fully aware of danger but if her parents were with her and supervising properly, why was her foot near a moving car?

EveryDayisFriday · 27/04/2025 08:41

A crazed man that drove into a small child like GTA and dragged her down the street intentionally is very different to no one paid attention to the moving car next to my daughter and she got her foot caught near the wheel.

Scenario 1 is police and hospital, Scenario 2 is lesson learned that dangers are everywhere and a trip to minor injuries to check there's no damage.

Chiseltip · 27/04/2025 09:34

Nevermindthebuzzard · 27/04/2025 07:52

Leaving the scene of an incident without giving your details is a crime though.

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But not an emergency.

Nevermindthebuzzard · 27/04/2025 09:51

EveryDayisFriday · 27/04/2025 08:41

A crazed man that drove into a small child like GTA and dragged her down the street intentionally is very different to no one paid attention to the moving car next to my daughter and she got her foot caught near the wheel.

Scenario 1 is police and hospital, Scenario 2 is lesson learned that dangers are everywhere and a trip to minor injuries to check there's no damage.

The driver has a duty of care to make sure he doesn't run anyone over. She didn't "get her foot caught". That implies it's her fault. He drove over it. If the parent had been standing there as an over zealous human shield, the parent would have been hit instead. It's not ok to drive into adults either.

If she did make a claim against his insurance, there's no way on earth his insurance company would even bother disputing liability. Allowing an 8 year old to get into a car without a helicopter parent standing right next to her is not negligent. Allowing a 4 year old to run off in a car park might be, but that's not what happened. Driving off without making sure it's safe to do so, and therefore driving into a child, is negligent. It's really not hard to understand, is it? If he hadn't moved his car, the incident wouldn't have happened.

I really hope some of you aren't drivers if you don't understand your duty of care not to drive into pedestrians, even if they are standing in an inconvenient spot.

Nevermindthebuzzard · 27/04/2025 09:52

Chiseltip · 27/04/2025 09:34

But not an emergency.

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The police aren't just there for emergencies. Whenever I've called, them they ask is it an emergency or a crime in progress. A crime was in progress. You might not think it was a very serious one, but what if the child did have a serious fracture to her foot? Nobody knew how bad it was at the point he was trying to make off from the scene.

andweallsingalong · 27/04/2025 10:06

I absolutely agree with you OP that it was a crime in progress and 999 was the right call.

He ran over the foot of a child directly in his field of vision and refused to give details. Potential dangerous driving (Crown Court stuff). The refusal would make me think he was drunk, high, no license and so shouldn't have been on the road and needed the police straight there.

In the moment I might have 101'd it, but I think 999 was the right shout AND the call taker agreed with you.

Lurkingandlearning · 27/04/2025 10:13

I’m pretty sure you are supposed to call the police when someone is injured in a car accident and I’m even more sure it’s illegal to drive away when you’ve hurt someone.

If he actually drove over her foot it could easily have been broken

Valeriekat · 27/04/2025 10:17

You did the right thing. He injured a child by driving without due care. He shouldn't be driving.

Shatteredallthetimelately · 27/04/2025 10:32

We were out today at a family event. We were parked up in the car park of the venue and were getting in our cars to travel home. There was a man parked next to us in the (relatively narrow) bays, window down, chatting to his girlfriend. He was there when we came out and approached our car.

You also say...
DD had actually got out of DH’s car (the other side of the man’s car) and was coming to get in mine.
There is no way this would have happened had I been in charge from the off as I would have made sure she was in the car before I started to get in. As it was, I was on the wrong side when it happened

I don't understand the above part.

But you were there, you say in a PP that your DD was getting into the car, opposite side to you in the back, at the same time as you were getting in, you were there, you were in charge of DD at the time.

Why didn't your DD just stay in your DH's car or if it was a narrow gap why not open the door for her and see her in.

Endofyear · 27/04/2025 11:12

Have the police been in touch with you to update you OP? I don't know what, if anything, he could be charged with - possibly he would have been given a caution? I hope your daughter is ok. I think you've been given a hard time on here, it most definitely is a police matter if your child is injured and he tried to leave the scene of an accident. It might have looked like just a scrape but she could have sustained a fracture without it being immediately obvious.

lunalovegood25 · 27/04/2025 11:45

Shmee1988 · 27/04/2025 08:17

Tell that to the woman whose husband is dying of a heart attack or the mother of a toddler choking on a grape, they can't be seen as no available ambulance but at least one was there to tend to your daughters grazed ankle.....

Police, yes at a push.. ambulance no way! All you needed was his reg.

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She didn’t ring for an ambulance so that’s totally irrelevant

Zinnialime · 27/04/2025 13:18

megacat · 27/04/2025 08:04

Considering what happened here it’s not 8 is it? OP should take some responsibility for the fact she wasn’t watching her child.

Presumably you’re the sort who leaves them to it and lets them fling the door open with no care for the car parked next to it.

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But this injury could have happened to an adult as well, it has nothing to do with the child's age. It's purely the driver's fault - he clearly didn't look where he was reversing. The other driver may have reversed at an angle as well, into the parking space the victim was standing in.

AnnoyedAsAllHeck · 27/04/2025 13:28

Sherararara · 26/04/2025 20:40

Ok, another police call operator then, tied up and delayed on response to a call from a woman being beaten by her partner. Is that better for you?

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Nope. You still sound cruel and deranged, to be quite honest.

IdaGlossop · 27/04/2025 14:11

2024riot · 26/04/2025 17:48

Why on earth an ambulance ?

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I should have been clearer. OP's DD was injured. OP called the police. That's a bit confusing for a child, who would be likely to connect being hurt with an ambulance being called, not the police.

cheerfulaf · 27/04/2025 14:25

Some of these responses are wild 😂

My other half is a police officer and I showed him this. He said unequivocally OP did the right thing in calling the police.

Amazing that some of you would take down the reg if someone injured your child?? I’d do that if they clipped my wing mirror, not my kid

ambercabs · 27/04/2025 14:44

cheerfulaf · 27/04/2025 14:25

Some of these responses are wild 😂

My other half is a police officer and I showed him this. He said unequivocally OP did the right thing in calling the police.

Amazing that some of you would take down the reg if someone injured your child?? I’d do that if they clipped my wing mirror, not my kid

I wouldn’t even have done that, given the injury not being serious. What have the police actually done?

Sherararara · 27/04/2025 15:30

AnnoyedAsAllHeck · 27/04/2025 13:28

Nope. You still sound cruel and deranged, to be quite honest.

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What an odd response.

Nanny0gg · 27/04/2025 15:35

EveryDayisFriday · 26/04/2025 18:08

I think you overreacted. He didn't intentionally injure your child. Your child had her foot in the way of a moving car which was extremely dangerous, she should know better at 8.

The car was stationary when her dd was at the side trying to get in

Nanny0gg · 27/04/2025 15:37

Chiseltip · 27/04/2025 09:34

But not an emergency.

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But the dispatcher disagreed

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