To think the dating pool wouldn’t be so bad if married people stayed out of it?

[HonestPeer]

Dating is hard enough as it is but what makes it even worse is the number of people in relationships - especially married ones - who are still out here looking. Whether it’s full-on cheating, “open marriages” that only one spouse seems to know about, or people who just want attention while keeping their home life intact, it muddies the waters for those who are actually single and serious about finding someone.

I can’t help but think the dating pool wouldn’t feel so bleak if the people who shouldn’t be in it just stayed in their lane. Or is this just the reality of modern dating?

AIBU to think that married people - whether they’re sneaking around or just “seeing what’s out there” - are making dating worse for everyone else?

YANBU. That’s awful.

of course YANBU

Yes you’re right, they’re filling it with men who are wasting everyones time. Plus the sweet shop mentality.

Most married people who are on the dating sites just want a bit on the side. So I don't bother with the sites anymore

Absolutely of course YANBU! I wish it could be law that married/LT people weren’t allowed on dating sites haha. It blows my mind how many men (and women) download the apps just to browse what’s out there whilst playing the happy couple at home. Because of this, I vowed never to ever go on such sites ever again. 20 years later I’ve still stuck by this. I’d rather find someone out in the wild and take a chance there than all this heavily filtered, messaging like teens forever, ghosting nonsense!

It's one of the myriad of reasons I don't do OLD any more. I'm very anti cheating but even if I wasn't, why would I want someone who isn't fully available?

I appreciate when guys are at least open about it at the start, as it means I can ditch them straight away. But with a lot of them, you just don't know. It's always a risk.

This blows my mind! Ffs, men. I was ready to be all, yabu and must be exaggerating but then everyone agrees, clearly there are loads of them out there! Sorry OP, what wankers.

100% There are some sleazy affair websites out there. Can’t they just stick to those? Then the single people who want to get involved with married people are doing it knowingly. I suppose it ruins the fun for the players who just like to play with peoples lives and emotions though doesn’t it. Yuck.