Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Am I being unsupportive of ill partner?

32 replies

Itsmeocathy · 23/04/2025 20:33

So my partner planned a visit to see their parents over Easter weekend with our DC. It’s a VERY long drive (10+ hours) so I was already dreading the journey. As we packed the bags into the car, my partner says, oh, I had a high fever last night but I’m feeling ok today. I warned them we shouldn’t visit elderly parents if ill, but they convinced me they were ok. On the night we arrive, surprise, surprise, they’re feeling much, much worse. So the next day I’m the only one socialising with their parents and the DC. Turns out it’s flu. On our day to return, they’re too ill to drive back. I’m furious we made the trip in the first place. Surely I have every right to be cross? They are making me feel like a terrible person for being pissed off.

OP posts:
BlueTitShark · 23/04/2025 21:32

I think doing a 10 hours drive, knowing you’re the only driver too, when you’ve been ill with a fever the night before is stupid.
It’s the whole macho man, look at me, a little sniffle will not stop me! with no care for his parents (who won’t thank him for giving them ‘the flu’).

Seeing that he was the first one to be ill, I’m assuming he is now feeling better than you. Is he looking after the baby now? Or is he expecting you to do that too!

BlueTitShark · 23/04/2025 21:34

@doodleschnoodle can you explain how the OP is goi g to make it ‘an extended hols’ when she, herself is ill?

I don’t know about you, but if I catch ‘the flu’, I usually prefer to be in my iwn home, in my own bed. Not trying to make it a hols. Assuming it’s the proper flu (or Covid) and you’re actually totally wiped out.

ayonoosh · 23/04/2025 21:45

BlueTitShark · 23/04/2025 21:32

I think doing a 10 hours drive, knowing you’re the only driver too, when you’ve been ill with a fever the night before is stupid.
It’s the whole macho man, look at me, a little sniffle will not stop me! with no care for his parents (who won’t thank him for giving them ‘the flu’).

Seeing that he was the first one to be ill, I’m assuming he is now feeling better than you. Is he looking after the baby now? Or is he expecting you to do that too!

her partner had literally said they're too ill to drive so haven't driven home yet..

I know you're frothing at the mouth to bad mouth men but you're off the mark here.

BlueTitShark · 23/04/2025 21:47

ayonoosh · 23/04/2025 21:45

her partner had literally said they're too ill to drive so haven't driven home yet..

I know you're frothing at the mouth to bad mouth men but you're off the mark here.

Show quote history

I was talking about going down to see the parents , not coming back up. It’s too late now.

And women have that ‘Be Strong’ attitude too. Not just men (even though men are more likely to do do that)

nopineapplepizza · 23/04/2025 21:52

Your partner was foolish.

This was a completely foreseeable outcome, your DC are missing school because of their silly decision and their elderly parents could get very ill if it’s flu.

What an idiot.

westartfires · 23/04/2025 22:00

I agree - he was foolish to set off at all knowing he had a fever. Having a fever is never a good sign, is it? And what about his elderly parents if- they don’t want to catch the virus either. Very selfish indeed

westartfires · 23/04/2025 22:02

Not to mention driving when ill could actually be dangerous if the partner took a turn for the worse

New posts on this thread. Refresh page