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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

My manager is making me come in the office 4days a week

312 replies

Lavendar01 · 23/04/2025 07:43

Since beginning of my role (which was coming out of covid), I've been hybrid working 3days in the office and 2days wfh. I had my own office but had to give it up for other staff that were in full time. Manger agreed for me to wfh and come in once a week - worked perfect!

In my recent supervision manager said he wants me in 4days a week "business need" and that there will be a room available to share with a couple of other staff. I've gone in and that room isn't set up, currently its dusty with extra office furniture/ equipment, basically being used storage room for now. I made a point to my manager and said could I continue wfh until the room is sorted, he refused and said to set up in that room somewhere in the corner for now.

AIBU here thinking I am within my right to refuse to be there until I have a proper work station set up, as required for my role? Not to mention sitting in an empty room for 8 hours with no interaction effects my mental wellbeing

OP posts:
SirRaymondClench · 23/04/2025 12:48

aylis · 23/04/2025 12:18

Feeling sorry for employers 😅

They can't take the piss out of their workers to same extent. Every single person has the right to request flexible working. In many cases it's the same kind of flexible working the poor employers have enjoyed the entire time.

Edited

Your attitude towards work is really shitty if you think that all employers take the piss by expecting their employees to work in the office.

Brefugee · 23/04/2025 12:50

WitchesCauldron · 23/04/2025 12:46

With respect that doesn't apply to clinical staff. We don't have that choice.

yes but we are all grown-ups and must therefore accept that there are some jobs that have to be done onsite. And, as with everyone else, if you really want flexibility or hybrid or WFH nothing is stopping you looking for another job.

CautiousLurker01 · 23/04/2025 12:52

aylis · 23/04/2025 11:44

Nurses, doctors, paramedics, police, firefighters

All entitled to request flexible working.

Indeed. All the ones I know (nurses, doctors, police) all have 1-2 days working from home - doing admin, reports, seeing patients/doing meetings via Teams.

aylis · 23/04/2025 12:53

SirRaymondClench · 23/04/2025 12:48

Your attitude towards work is really shitty if you think that all employers take the piss by expecting their employees to work in the office.

Employee rights exist precisely because employers took the piss. Employment tribunals exist because they still try to. Absolutely nowhere did I say or imply that this is by the mere act of requesting office working of employees.

aylis · 23/04/2025 12:57

CautiousLurker01 · 23/04/2025 12:52

Indeed. All the ones I know (nurses, doctors, police) all have 1-2 days working from home - doing admin, reports, seeing patients/doing meetings via Teams.

Yep. Totally support them being able to do non-clinical work from home. Absolutely no reason not to. World is full of mental jobsworths frankly.

HoskinsChoice · 23/04/2025 12:57

Ponoka7 · 23/04/2025 08:08

@Needtosoundoffandbreathe you honestly don't see the advantages of being able to sign off for an hour to, go to the dentist/GP/local health centre. Or to go to a school etc meeting/play, let the boiler repair etc person in, rather than have to take a morning/day off? Not everyone works in places that make it easier to get those things done.
We are only wanted in the workplaces because there is less being spent on public transport, in coffee shops/food vans, on all the things we are blamed for eating. We also then spend less on grooming/clothes etc. The increase in road traffic accidents and the health impacts via stress, is collateral damage. It's a business decision by those at the top, whose investments rely on us spending.
The OP needs to be provided with a work space, that is clean and uncluttered. Dusty places need vacuuming and airing, not just a duster and plants (on the non existent desk).

Oh dear. Someone's been groomed by the conspiracy theorists! 🤣🤣🤣

Theunamedcat · 23/04/2025 13:12

I genuinely don't see why there is such a push to get back into the office at the same time as trying to stop people using cars as much it seems that it directly contradicts itself we would all save money if we could work from home appropriately no-one NEEDS to be stuck in an office on there own just have some sense about it all

whoamI00 · 23/04/2025 13:12

I think you can refuse but the desk can be sorted out in a day or a couple of days. I see no point in refusing it.

SnugReader · 23/04/2025 13:14

HoskinsChoice · 23/04/2025 12:57

Oh dear. Someone's been groomed by the conspiracy theorists! 🤣🤣🤣

That's not conspiracy theory.

The government is currently asking for evidence on the effects of WFH/hybrid working on society and the economy.

https://committees.parliament.uk/committee/771/homebased-working-committee/news/205578/call-for-evidence-launched-into-remote-and-hybrid-working-in-the-uk/#:~:text=This%20inquiry%20will%20address%20the,the%20UK%20economy%20and%20society.

One of the questions is : What, if anything, is the impact of remote and hybrid working on the UK’s economic growth and international competitiveness?

Economic growth is closely tied to consumer and business spending.

Less money spent of coffees, sandwiches, lunches, the money spent in the pub for a work drinks on a Friday, less money spent on transport, reduced need of new cars, fewer impulse purchases when you see a nice top in a shop walking past on your way to the office...

Less consumer money spent means less demand for production which means fewer jobs needed in those areas of production so less growth for businesses providing those

AngelicKaty · 23/04/2025 13:19

Lavendar01 · 23/04/2025 07:54

Both husband and I wfh and have interactions throughout the day, whereas being in the office room is isolating. My role is unique in the service and so I dont have a team. With other staff its judt really a hi and bye on the kitchen.

Edited

But in your OP you wrote "I had my own office but had to give it up for other staff that were in full time." So what's the difference? You'll now have your own office again until they move others in with you (and then you won't be "isolated").

Edited to say I've now seen your later post saying you previously shared your "own" office with others, so not your "own" office that you had to give up at all. 😏

HSE legislation is clear that all individuals are responsible for their own H&S, as well as their colleagues, so you should set up your workstation appropriately and then ask your manager to check they agree it's safe for you to use - this would also give you the opportunity to raise any concerns you have about the office needing to be tidied up (surplus items being stored somewhere more appropriate) and asking when other employees will be joining you in that office.

Tartanboots · 23/04/2025 13:24

PlumRaspberryJam · 23/04/2025 11:22

OP, check your privilege. Nurses, doctors, paramedics, police, firefighters - all these and many more have to go into many ‘workplaces’ in less than ideal conditions. And so many do exceptional service (hats off to all of you!).

You don’t have a desk set up? Sort it out! Imagine one of the essential services such as a paramedic decided to wait for their bosses to set up perfect working conditions.

The OP requires a suitable workstation to do her job in the office, just as a paramedic/fire fighter requires equipment, vehicle etc to do their job, so the employer needs to provide it. She can't be expected to work in a cupboard any more than a paramedic can be expected to use their own car.

kinkytoes · 23/04/2025 13:27

LivingDeadGirlUK · 23/04/2025 07:57

why are people suggesting OP cleans and sorts this room, thats not her job! She needs a DSE compliant workstation which her company should have no issue providing. This is a case of a bad manager asking her to come in with nothing ready.

Not unheard of and she can explain that's why her actual work didn't get done that day.

Most people muddle through for a few days or weeks before a DSE assessment. You can do these yourself online if there are major concerns.

Doncarlos · 23/04/2025 13:29

Please don't pull the mental health card when, as you admit, you just don't want to work in the office. I get it, I do 3 days in office and 2 at home. I'd hate it if that was increased too, but citing mental health as a reason is not ok.

In fact, I wouldn't mention your partner at all as a defence in this. If I was your boss I'd probably consider your husband being a distraction and a reason for the failing output.

Brefugee · 23/04/2025 13:30

yes but if your workstation isn't DSE compliant - and that will be instantly recognisable if there is no actual desk set up, and the room is a dusty storage room - then OP has no need to work.

She could stand around supervising others getting it into shape, or join in or do it herself, but during that time she won't be working. Far far better that her employer says: here's your workstation, all set up. See you Monday through Thursday.

That is all. If they are insisting she be present, they must provide the place to work.

EmeraldRoulette · 23/04/2025 13:33

@Lavendar01 "Managers reasons to bring me in is because the performance of staff is dropping and he thinks it's because more "presence" is needed from myself"

how can he blame you for staff performance for people who aren't line managed by you?!

lunaemma · 23/04/2025 13:34

Ponoka7 · 23/04/2025 08:08

@Needtosoundoffandbreathe you honestly don't see the advantages of being able to sign off for an hour to, go to the dentist/GP/local health centre. Or to go to a school etc meeting/play, let the boiler repair etc person in, rather than have to take a morning/day off? Not everyone works in places that make it easier to get those things done.
We are only wanted in the workplaces because there is less being spent on public transport, in coffee shops/food vans, on all the things we are blamed for eating. We also then spend less on grooming/clothes etc. The increase in road traffic accidents and the health impacts via stress, is collateral damage. It's a business decision by those at the top, whose investments rely on us spending.
The OP needs to be provided with a work space, that is clean and uncluttered. Dusty places need vacuuming and airing, not just a duster and plants (on the non existent desk).

Um i don’t get to do any of that and i WFH FT
if i need to get an appointment i have to get it approved and can only take 1hr max, otherwise i have to work the hours back or take annual leave
not every WFH job is flexible

aylis · 23/04/2025 13:38

My mental health would be significantly impacted by having to go into the office 5 days a week and that's pretty much inescapable. Prior to covid, which was when we started hybrid working, I was struggling to balance school runs and childcare and other commitments with work and a not insignificant commute, while dealing with anxiety. In that sense, covid was an absolute lifesaver for me. The time pressure was off. I was able to increase my hours, my finances, my wellbeing, improve my work-life balance, and recover pretty well. All that would be gone. Luckily my employer can distinguish human beings from the machines they use.

AngelicKaty · 23/04/2025 13:39

Lavendar01 · 23/04/2025 08:40

Not exact quote but It sayssomething along the lines flexible working at discretion of business

Which tells you all you need to know OP.
Presumably, your employer has an office cleaner in the evenings, so just ask your manager if they can ensure the room they've designated to you be cleaned. If they don't contract a cleaner then all your colleagues are working in equally "dusty" conditions - or they're cleaning their own desks - in which case you need to do the same.
It's absolutely clear from your posts that you just don't want to go back into the office the extra day and you are clutching at straws to try to avoid this. You can't unless you find another job which gives you the contractual entitlement to WFH 3 days pw.

BitOutOfPractice · 23/04/2025 13:39

I’d love do know what happens to all these kids that wfh staff have just “nipped out for” when they get home.

and no, I’m not jealous because I worked from home for 20 years and in the end, hated it.

SnugReader · 23/04/2025 13:40

Doncarlos · 23/04/2025 13:29

Please don't pull the mental health card when, as you admit, you just don't want to work in the office. I get it, I do 3 days in office and 2 at home. I'd hate it if that was increased too, but citing mental health as a reason is not ok.

In fact, I wouldn't mention your partner at all as a defence in this. If I was your boss I'd probably consider your husband being a distraction and a reason for the failing output.

What do you mean by "pulling the mental health card?".

aylis · 23/04/2025 13:40

lunaemma · 23/04/2025 13:34

Um i don’t get to do any of that and i WFH FT
if i need to get an appointment i have to get it approved and can only take 1hr max, otherwise i have to work the hours back or take annual leave
not every WFH job is flexible

I think working back the hours is pretty standard. My employer is incredibly flexible, the most flexible I've ever known, but nobody would just take time for an appointment out of their working days and not work the time back.

Eyerollexpert · 23/04/2025 13:41

Yes need a proper desk and work space that meets DSE. We even have this when working from home. Plus I wouldn't be moving and handing if not trained or using cleaning equipment not my job not trained. But I am as awkward as the day is long if someone winds me up😊

Reetpetitenot · 23/04/2025 13:48

'my recent supervision manager said he wants me in 4 days a week "business need" and that there will be a room available to share with a couple of other staff.'

So you won't be on your own? And even if you were in your own office, as you have been previously, there will be others around in the workplace if everyone is being brought back 4 days.

lunaemma · 23/04/2025 13:50

aylis · 23/04/2025 13:40

I think working back the hours is pretty standard. My employer is incredibly flexible, the most flexible I've ever known, but nobody would just take time for an appointment out of their working days and not work the time back.

Everyone else who posts about WFH seems to be under the impression you can just get up and do some laundry or pop out to the shop or go to an appointment. Although my job is probably the most micro managed of all jobs!

Doncarlos · 23/04/2025 13:51

aylis · 23/04/2025 13:40

I think working back the hours is pretty standard. My employer is incredibly flexible, the most flexible I've ever known, but nobody would just take time for an appointment out of their working days and not work the time back.

I mean saying something is effecting your mental health when in fact you just don't want to do it.

It makes a mockery out of those who actually are suffering with it.

Edit - sorry I quoted wrong post. Not sure how that happened.

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