To wonder why my sister doesn’t seem interested in spending time together?

[GraceLou]

I’m trying to work out if I’m just being oversensitive here but lately, I find myself wondering why my sister just never wants to hang out with me 😂I’m 33 and she’s 30. She has two DS (3 and 1) and I have a DD (6mo). We’re close, text constantly and haven’t had any notable dramas or rocky patches in our relationship… but, over the past few years, I feel like she’s only interested in seeing me by chance - for example, when we’re both at our parents or there is a wider family activity. She never reaches out to me to make plans or ask to do something, it’s always me and 9 times out 10, she says no as she’s seeing friends or has plans. I don’t begrudge her having friends and plans, of course! I just wonder why she never makes any with me, I’d LOVE it if she asked me to go for a coffee or a lunch. I’m currently on mat leave and she doesn’t work Fridays. She always has plans with friends on Fridays, but has never asked me to do something or go for a coffee or whatever. We went to the cinema to see Bridget Jones a few weeks ago and I was so happy she said yes, I was beside myself with excitement and kept saying to my fiancé how much I couldn’t wait and that’s when I sort of noticed I’m always so happy to see her and she’s maybe just not that fussed. AIBU to wonder why this is? I do know she likes me, it isn’t a case of her hating me deep down or anything too deep haha! Getting to the point where I am going to stop asking because it’s always just a no - it’s like I see her as my best friend and she see’s me as a cumbersome old relative/duty😂does anyone else have similar with their sibling?! Essay, sorry…!

Here’s a thought: with a 1 and 3yo - poor woman must be exhausted!! You have ONE child, who is not mobile and takes regular naps. A 1 and 3yo requires you to be in two places at once.
even going for a coffee with 2 kids is such a massive effort I wouldn’t even bother. She texts you fine because that’s her capacity.
and her days off, she probably needs to get a ton of stuff done along with 2 kids.
You clearly have no clue.

You sound like you need a fucking nap more than any of us, cranky cow

I have 2 and work 4 days. I have lots of friends and family who complain I don’t see them enough. But I just don’t have time. It’s nothing personal. Hopefully it will improve as the kids get older.

Also I'm guessing you know about this from mum or sibling. I hope they can see how wrong she is.

Hmm, this sounds like she takes you for granted, in the manner of teenagers with their mums. Next time she asks say sorry, you've got something on (you have, it's taking the advice on this thread). Pull back, see your own friends and see if she notices.