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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Abusing the airline staff

143 replies

Dontcomeflyeithme · 22/04/2025 04:01

Why is this such a big thing these days? It seems to be the same throughout all customer service roles.

We we're going on holiday this evening and witnessed a fully grown woman on our flight throwing a raging hissy fit at the cabin staff.

The reason for this was, the staff were moving a disabled person into the window seat to allow her to sit with her partner.

The woman refused to let them use the seat beside her and demanded the staff tell her why they were moving someone.

The staff explained that she had no right to know this other person's personal information. This resulted in a 10 minute screaming match.

Never in my life have I witnessed something so crazy. As far as I could tell she looked completely sober.

Then you had idiots shouting at the staff as there was no space directly above their head for the cases. What do people expect when they come on later?

What are these people hoping to achieve?

OP posts:
RoseofRoses · 22/04/2025 10:11

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

LittleBigHead · 22/04/2025 10:17

SwanOfThoseThings · 22/04/2025 07:01

Was this a case of hissy woman having paid to book a specific seat, and disabled woman & partner not having booked? There's no excuse for being abusive to staff but I wouldn't blame someone for politely refusing to move in those circumstances.

Yes that’s what I wondered.

And it’s really annoying when you’ve paid for a carry on case and people put all sorts of stuff in the overhead bins which could go under the seat in front of them. So you have to trek all over the cabin.

Ihateslugs · 22/04/2025 10:20

Simonjt · 22/04/2025 08:05

It depends on the airline and the disability, we always book special assistance as my husband has a physical disability, the only seat he can’t be in is the emergency exit rows. He almost always books and sits in an aisle seat.

Exactly what I do! I’ve just booked business class to go to Boston, US, via Dublin. On the Dublin flight there is not a business section due to size of plane so business class travellers booking early enough are given priority for the extra leg room seats by the doors. Unfortunately as I have booked assistance to get around the airport due to knee problems, I cannot sit in these seats. I understand why and accept the situation, I would not dream of kicking off about it while on the plane!

I am however reluctant to swap my seat if it means I lose my aisle seat or extra leg room seat that I have paid extra for. I was once asked to swap my seat in business class ( it’s not that I am rich and only travel business class but being plus size, I get very uncomfortable in an economy seat so prefer to pay extra but fly on fewer holidays) from the single seat by the window to a middle seat which was next to another seat. I refused as when I fly on my own, I don’t feel comfortable sleeping in the fully reclined position next to a stranger. The man who wanted my seat got very angry with me and the crew, claiming that there were no single seats available when he booked at short notice and therefore he had the right to move! I stood my ground though and he had to sit in the seat he booked but then spent the next 9 hours moaning about me to those sat near him! I just ignored him, put headphones on and went to sleep!

Badbadbunny · 22/04/2025 10:29

Needtosoundoffandbreathe · 22/04/2025 07:01

I agree there's no need for shouting and swearing. I can understand someone being upset at being moved if they've planned and paid for a specific seat. Often travelling means losing sleep, you don't know whether they have a fear of flying, etc. and all these things have a cumulative effect.

@JustMyView13 where's DR?

Not to mention all the stresses of getting through the airport, and even the travel to get to the airport. Everything is stressful and doesn't work properly these days.

JohnPrescottsPyjamas · 22/04/2025 10:31

One of the best examples of entitlement I ever saw on a flight was an announcement after we all boarded and sitting down in a very full aircraft. Apparently, a honeymoon couple had told the crew, if they couldn’t sit together, they wanted to get off the flight.

The passengers were asked if anyone was willing to swap their seat, otherwise there would be a delay whilst this couple’s cases were offloaded. Having paid extra for a bulkhead seat with extra legroom and an allocated seat to next to my DH, I’m afraid we weren’t going to be the noble ones!

I assume someone accommodated them as we very soon departed, but I was gobsmacked by the emotional manipulation employed by this pair to get their own way.

GasPanic · 22/04/2025 10:33

The problem is when you book and pay for a seat you do literally have an entitlement to sit in that seat. I don't know the exact T&Cs of the booking, but I would hope that the airline would do everything possible to ensure you got that seat and assist you if someone was kicking off about it or trying to make you move. If a member of airline staff asked me to move I would demand a refund.

The problem isn't with people who have paid for refusing to move. It's with the people who seem to think it's OK to upend the rest of the world because they cannot be bothered to book and pay for specific seat reservations. And 90% of the time it seems to me that these people would be perfectly OK not having to sit next to the person of their choice for the duration of the flight.

notimagain · 22/04/2025 10:40

The problem is when you book and pay for a seat you do literally have an entitlement to sit in that seat.

Problem is if you dig into the fine print of the T&Cs of almost any airline you'll find a clause that says something like you can be moved from your booked seat for operational reasons.

Now that's mainly there to cover aircraft/configuration changes but it gives the airline some wriggle room...

GasPanic · 22/04/2025 10:45

notimagain · 22/04/2025 10:40

The problem is when you book and pay for a seat you do literally have an entitlement to sit in that seat.

Problem is if you dig into the fine print of the T&Cs of almost any airline you'll find a clause that says something like you can be moved from your booked seat for operational reasons.

Now that's mainly there to cover aircraft/configuration changes but it gives the airline some wriggle room...

Edited

Oh I'm sure it does.

But in that case they should immediately refund you the cost of the booking.

This is all about the airlines being greedy at the end of the day. The passengers turn on each other, but it is the airlines who are really responsible for the shit show. Otherwise they would just let everyone reserve for free online.

Philandbill · 22/04/2025 10:47

MalleusMaleficarumm · 22/04/2025 07:46

DH is a captain, people are like this all the time. He’s so fed up of it now that he will just stop people flying, nobody should be treated like that at work. Honestly some of the stories of poor behaviour you wouldn’t believe!

Interested to know how this works @MalleusMaleficarumm . Does he notify the airline and they ban all future bookings? Really hope so! Aggressive people need to know that they can't get away with it.

StarlightLady · 22/04/2025 10:51

GasPanic · 22/04/2025 10:33

The problem is when you book and pay for a seat you do literally have an entitlement to sit in that seat. I don't know the exact T&Cs of the booking, but I would hope that the airline would do everything possible to ensure you got that seat and assist you if someone was kicking off about it or trying to make you move. If a member of airline staff asked me to move I would demand a refund.

The problem isn't with people who have paid for refusing to move. It's with the people who seem to think it's OK to upend the rest of the world because they cannot be bothered to book and pay for specific seat reservations. And 90% of the time it seems to me that these people would be perfectly OK not having to sit next to the person of their choice for the duration of the flight.

You do not have an entitlement to that seat. You have an entitlement to a refund if, for whatever reason, the booked seat is not provided.

There are many legit reasons why a booked seat may not be provided, including a change in aircraft type. In which case your booked row may not exist.

The final say is with the captain. Although she/he has better things to do than worry about who is sitting next to Aunty Fanny!

HelenaWaiting · 22/04/2025 10:54

A couple of years ago I was waiting at the departure gate for a flight from Manchester to London. It was a journey I took regularly at the time. I have MS and use an electric wheelchair. Also at the gate was a group of about six youngish men who were rolling drunk - singing, shouting and harassing other passengers. At one point one of them decided to push my wheelchair. It wouldn't move of course, and as the brake was on he almost succeeded in tipping me out of it. He was very apologetic but also told me to fuck off. When I was called to board, first, due to my disability, I asked why they were being allowed to fly and was told that they had "promised to behave". Inevitably, once airborne, they ran riot, inflated their life jackets and were very abusive to staff. At Heathrow, they were all arrested. I'm afraid we live by the standards we set. Those men could have put the other passengers in danger. If we're too ready to be lenient with poor behaviour, or to afraid to say no, we live with the consequences of our choices. Unfortunately, sometimes other people have to live with those consequences too. Stop selling alcohol in airports, stop serving alcohol on planes, and deny boarding to anyone who is evidently under the influence of drink or drugs.

notimagain · 22/04/2025 10:54

This is all about the airlines being greedy at the end of the day.

No it's really not but once we get into discussions about charging for seat choice it doesn"t take long before the airlines get accused of being greedy or gouging.

The airline balance sheets really don't support that POV...

The reality is that lots of people like debundled pricing, especially solo travellers....if you remove seat choice fees base fares will go up.

.

GasPanic · 22/04/2025 10:58

StarlightLady · 22/04/2025 10:51

You do not have an entitlement to that seat. You have an entitlement to a refund if, for whatever reason, the booked seat is not provided.

There are many legit reasons why a booked seat may not be provided, including a change in aircraft type. In which case your booked row may not exist.

The final say is with the captain. Although she/he has better things to do than worry about who is sitting next to Aunty Fanny!

How many airlines actually make that clear at the booking process though, rather than burying it in the small print ?

And how many of them lead with the offer of giving you compensation when they ask you to move your seat when you have paid for it ?

I am guessing not many.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 22/04/2025 10:58

Nominative · 22/04/2025 09:01

I'm getting my own personal taste of that currently. My brother is in Australia and has never been a good communicator, but since my mother died and I became executor of her estate I'm suddenly hearing much more from him than I have for years - but on one theme only, i.e. how much is he going to get and when. I'm so pissed off, I really don't care if I never hear from him again.

I’m reminded of an aunt who left her estate to be divided equally between several nieces and nephews, some in the US/Canada. Dh and a BiL were executors.

Sorting out the estate was fairly simple, and didn’t take too long, but before it was finalised a Canadian cousin who I’d never met before, invited himself to stay, and actually banged on our dining table, saying, ‘I want to know what’s going on with this money!’
He virtually accused Dh and BiL of fiddling.
The cousin stayed for 10 days and after he left there was not so much as an email to say thanks for having him.

ThatVividNavyCat · 22/04/2025 10:59

This sounds awful! I feel so sorry for the Cabin Crew!

Badbadbunny · 22/04/2025 10:59

@HelenaWaiting

Stop selling alcohol in airports, stop serving alcohol on planes, and deny boarding to anyone who is evidently under the influence of drink or drugs.

How much more are YOU willing to pay for your flight to cover the loss revenue from airports and aircraft selling alcohol??

ClaudiusTheGod · 22/04/2025 11:00

PurBal · 22/04/2025 06:44

I can’t answer your question. But I guess we don’t know their story. I use the contents of my carryon on the flight, and I check everything I don’t need. On a short haul flight it might be just the size of a bum bag, and long haul I may need a bigger bag. It would annoy me if I had to trek up and down every time I needed something and it would also mean I block the aisle, but I get the impression that’s not the case here.

This attitude is a huge part of the issue. Who gives a shit what her problem is if she can’t be bothered to explain it in a reasonable manner?

Your attitude is a direct result of the Be Kind bollocks. How about being kind to service employees?

ClaudiusTheGod · 22/04/2025 11:01

HelenaWaiting · 22/04/2025 10:54

A couple of years ago I was waiting at the departure gate for a flight from Manchester to London. It was a journey I took regularly at the time. I have MS and use an electric wheelchair. Also at the gate was a group of about six youngish men who were rolling drunk - singing, shouting and harassing other passengers. At one point one of them decided to push my wheelchair. It wouldn't move of course, and as the brake was on he almost succeeded in tipping me out of it. He was very apologetic but also told me to fuck off. When I was called to board, first, due to my disability, I asked why they were being allowed to fly and was told that they had "promised to behave". Inevitably, once airborne, they ran riot, inflated their life jackets and were very abusive to staff. At Heathrow, they were all arrested. I'm afraid we live by the standards we set. Those men could have put the other passengers in danger. If we're too ready to be lenient with poor behaviour, or to afraid to say no, we live with the consequences of our choices. Unfortunately, sometimes other people have to live with those consequences too. Stop selling alcohol in airports, stop serving alcohol on planes, and deny boarding to anyone who is evidently under the influence of drink or drugs.

That’s absolutely awful and I’m sorry that happened to you. Disgraceful behaviour.

Badbadbunny · 22/04/2025 11:01

GasPanic · 22/04/2025 10:58

How many airlines actually make that clear at the booking process though, rather than burying it in the small print ?

And how many of them lead with the offer of giving you compensation when they ask you to move your seat when you have paid for it ?

I am guessing not many.

Add in the almost impossibility of getting a refund for the extra you paid for your seat afterwards as you can guarantee the cabin staff havn't "pinged" a message to their head office as to who was bumped out of their seat. So it becomes a battle to "prove" that you didn't get the seat you paid for. Been there. Won't be doing it again. Next time, I'll be wanting a signature off the cabin crew confirming they've bumped me out of the seat I've paid for!

MichaelandKirk · 22/04/2025 11:03

All over MN are people explaining the 'reasons' for bad behaviour and criminal intent.

Mental health
Fear of flying
Special needs

And so it goes on.

I was burgled a number of years ago. It was done by some teens who beat up the dog. I called them the scum of the earth and was slaughtered on a thread. Various explanations as to why they did what they did and to not write them off.

MrsGaryKemp · 22/04/2025 11:03

@GasPanic
Its not compensation, it’s a refund.

HelenaWaiting · 22/04/2025 11:04

Badbadbunny · 22/04/2025 10:59

@HelenaWaiting

Stop selling alcohol in airports, stop serving alcohol on planes, and deny boarding to anyone who is evidently under the influence of drink or drugs.

How much more are YOU willing to pay for your flight to cover the loss revenue from airports and aircraft selling alcohol??

Given that I was shit-scared on that flight and thought that the plane was going down, I'd be prepared to pay quite a lot more. What about you? How much drunken, abusive behaviour do you deem acceptable if it keeps the ticket prices down?

MrsGaryKemp · 22/04/2025 11:05

MichaelandKirk · 22/04/2025 11:03

All over MN are people explaining the 'reasons' for bad behaviour and criminal intent.

Mental health
Fear of flying
Special needs

And so it goes on.

I was burgled a number of years ago. It was done by some teens who beat up the dog. I called them the scum of the earth and was slaughtered on a thread. Various explanations as to why they did what they did and to not write them off.

Thats awful, sorry you and your dog experienced this. I’d agree with your assessment of the perpetrators!

Temporaryname158 · 22/04/2025 11:07

MalleusMaleficarumm · 22/04/2025 07:46

DH is a captain, people are like this all the time. He’s so fed up of it now that he will just stop people flying, nobody should be treated like that at work. Honestly some of the stories of poor behaviour you wouldn’t believe!

I wish more would. If people thought there would be a negative consequence to themselves they would be nicer to staff and those around them I’m sure.

it would only take it to happen to a few and the majority would change I think

notimagain · 22/04/2025 11:10

Badbadbunny · 22/04/2025 10:59

@HelenaWaiting

Stop selling alcohol in airports, stop serving alcohol on planes, and deny boarding to anyone who is evidently under the influence of drink or drugs.

How much more are YOU willing to pay for your flight to cover the loss revenue from airports and aircraft selling alcohol??

Valid point.

As far as on board bans go I'll stick with the POV that banning it on many flights would be getting into sledgehammer and nut territory.

Fly with an airline where the ground staff and crew are proactive on boarding, will always get backed up management if they decide to offload, and who monitor onboard consumption and it's rare that there is a significant problem.

OTOH at airlines where perhaps management back up isn't solid, and where perhaps on certain routes the ground staff just want the flight gone and it's a recipe for trouble..

I don't think you should penalise every passenger just because maybe some airlines/airports don't police this properly.