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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Annoying brother-in-law

7 replies

Sandandpebbles · 18/04/2025 11:37

Please help me how to deal with this guy as he is really really annoying me.

Long story short, my sister is known for always getting along with the wrong guys but this time she married this one. I don’t think she reasons on what he is doing as she is not very emotionally mature.

She is very manipulative and she just likes to use people and then get rid of them when she is done with them. We are at my parents house at the moment visiting and meanwhile he moved in my parents house, they don’t pay any bills, they drive my parent’s car. He doesn’t own a car, he doesn’t have a house or a flat, his parents don’t give him the car nor help him financially.

Also, he can clearly see I don’t like leaving my DC with him on their own and he constantly insists “oh let’s take the DC with us”, then he touches her all the time like he tickles her properly and I just don’t like it. I will say she doesn’t like it and he will still do it so I physically remove her. She then cries because I’m the mean mum obviously as she thinks they are playing.
My stupid sister just sits and watches -she never backs me up.

But now I had enough - I left the room for 2 minutes but I can still hear them and I can still see them and he threw himself on her.

I actually hate it - it makes me feel sick.

please tell me what to do, he drives me crazy.

OP posts:
Oldraver · 18/04/2025 16:00

Read him the riot act and tell him to leave your DC alone. Your gut is telling you something for a reason

SeventeenClovesOfGarlic · 18/04/2025 16:03

Visit your parents away from their home. Don't make your child be around the man at all.

Igmum · 18/04/2025 16:05

I’m with Oldraver. I don’t like the sound of this guy. Keep your DD well away.

Shinyandnew1 · 18/04/2025 16:14

he threw himself on her.

Who? Your daughter or your sister?

If he's living with your parents, don't go and stay there. Invite them to come and stay with you-without your sister.

ExtraOnions · 18/04/2025 16:16

Do you think he has a sexual interest in your child ?

thepariscrimefiles · 18/04/2025 16:18

Stop visiting your parents. Invite them to your house instead and make it clear that your sister and her DH aren't invited.

What do your parents feel about your sister and her DH moving into their home, paying nothing and taking their car? Are they scared to say no?

coldcallerbaiter · 18/04/2025 16:22

ExtraOnions · 18/04/2025 16:16

Do you think he has a sexual interest in your child ?

Tickling by men and male relatives is a red flag. It’s a way of getting your hands on the child and brushing past bits in an ‘innocent’ way.

I remember it as a child and knew something was up with it even then.

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