Wwyd ivf for #3

[Dreamingofthree]

Posting for traffic.

So I’ve 2 children that were conceived naturally in under a year.
there is a backstory to #1, I was told by a dr when I was mid 20s I had pcos and would never conceive naturally, long story short got sucked into that pursued private ivf, dh had variable sperm, was told needed Icsi and wouldn’t conceive without it. Saved and then fell pregnant with #1.
assuming children wouldn’t come easy to us weren’t as careful as one should be and concerivd #2 at 18 m pp.
im 35 now, and have been ttc for 7 months with no success. I’ve had all the initial tests.
were initially reluctant to get dh to have a sperm test because of all the before (it was really stressful and i know it’s bad but a part of me was angry at him, illogical and unfair and I never voiced this but it’s how I felt).
all my tests were super duper. No structural abnormalities, hormones normal, follicular phase is on the longer side but there is no medical cause (and it always was) amh super good (higher than most 25yr old I’m told), and no pcos. Was a misdiagnosis.
we said with #3 we wouldn’t pursue ivf due to the cost but we just found out that our health insurance has a £15k lifetime max per adult for ivf. So we’d just have to pay the £100 excess each.
given time is of the essence, wwyd?
would you even do ivf for #3? Even if it was ‘free’
would you bite the bullet and go for it now, rather than hang about?

has a £15k lifetime max per adult for ivf. So we’d just have to pay the £100 excess each.

Do it.

Cost was your only prohibitive factor? Now that's removed? Any other reasons?

It’s was a huge part of it. I need to understand more about the policy too to check if meds are included etc but cost was 80% of it as well as the stress of ivf in and as of itself and impact on current family

But would you do it now? Or round out the year.

in truth the first 5 months ttc were high stress, and my body responds very poorly to stress

If you're even considering a 3rd then I'd say do it!
I already have 2 and had been trying for a 3rd for a long time. Once I hit 30 we went to the GP for help. I'm 35 this year and have only just last month had egg collection. Unexpected and undiagnosed issues reared their head along the way and caused us delay after delay. If I had known about them to begin with, I would have went for help sooner. I never imagined 5 years later we would still be without a baby.

Have you checked it covers you given you’ve already conceived twice naturally?

It’s not mentioned as an exclusion in the policy documents

You may wish to check with the insurers, the policy will probably have been drafted with people who cannot conceive at all in mind.

I’ve just checked the definition it says

Your consultant has confirmed that you or (where applicable) your partner haven’t
been able to conceive a child within the clinically expected time frame and that a
formal investigation is justified.

prior Children is not mentioned

although re reading again it’s a combined life time allowance of £15k

I’ve re read the policy and their definition of infertility encompasses secondary infertility

I’d go for it if you’re both set on having a third. I had ivf for my first and fell pregnant naturally with my second and it was a complete shock. Just double check the insurance will cover you. Good luck!

The next question is would you jump the gun and say we’ve been trying for a year when we sort of haven’t?

I would probably give it a few more months and then go for it. Currently saving to use my last embryo which could be number three. I wouldn't lie though. We had to wait three years to get any investigations started.

How come you had to wait?

thats the thing, ostensibly nothing has changed with our health, my egg count is fine, and I’d imagine statistically if you’ve conceived twice naturally then, surely the odd are in our favour. But I dunno what’s going ‘wrong’ or so to speak

That was the rule at the time. The year after they changed it to two years. 🤬