I don’t know how to stop breastfeeding

[TimeToStopp]

I have a almost 17month old baby who was exclusively breastfed.

I also have one more child who was mixed fed and stopped breastfeeding at 13 months. It was easy as there was the bottle and not that much breast milk anyway.

My 17month old now only breastfeeds to go to sleep at night and when wakes up in the night.

I want to stop breastfeeding but I don’t know how to manage sleep as this is how he does go to sleep.

Please share your advise.

Watching with interest - my 20 month old boy is also a real fiend for feeding still!

I can tell you how we did it. DH took a week off work. For 3 days in a row, he did bedtimes and co-slept and offered milk in a cup or water. Little ones know he’s not the one with milk and settle fine. Job done by day 4 I can do bedtime again.

When DS was 2 1/2 he was still feeding quite regularly and I needed to move on. I told him that as he was getting such a big boy my boobs were running out of baby milk then used distraction and a cup instead. I was amazed that he accepted it as he was a massive boob monster.

I did an evening feed until dc was a little over 2, but didn’t feed in the night, as dc had to learn to self-settle (I was back at work by that time). We did weaning by don’t-offer-don’t refuse and over a period of a few weeks we stopped.

I stopped at 15 months with both mine. At that point they were just feeding before bed. I gave them milk in a cup and cuddled them to sleep instead. They were upset for a couple of nights and then fine.

DC2 was very attached to their bedtime feed at 2.5 years. I just went out a few evenings in a row and left DP to put DC2 to bed. No replacement drinks. Job done.

@popandchoc for the couple of nights that they were upset how did you get them off to sleep? And what about night waking?

@JillAndJenTheFlowerpotMen the night waking is my main worry. At the moment he just resettles on the breast so it kind of works without me having to wake myself too much. I don’t funny having to start walking around with him to get him back to sleep. He shares room with his sibling so I’m also conscious of him waking her up if I don’t settle him back to sleep.

There’s a book called something like when breastfeeding stops. I don’t know if it’s still in print but would happily send you my copy. I bought it but never read it as mine all self weaned. Ds was the longest at just before going into Reception so 4.5 years!! Only st bedtime by then though. He’s now 10 and told me yesterday that he misses boobs. It was the best milk ever he says.

Here it is

We stopped night feeds by my husband going in, offering a bottle of water, and settling her to sleep. Worked in a few days and she started sleeping through.

@LegoTherapy did you mean to send a link?
How did you manage to get to 4 1/2. That’s good work. Part of me fears that’ll end up being me. That’s quite sweet as well what he said.

Popped up on my screen now

I believe The Breastfeeding Mentor on instagram has weaning info available. Lucy Webber Feeding Support on there may do.
Well done for feeding your baby for this long and good luck with the weaning 😊

We just kept going. It was a big part of our bond and we were both happy. Dd2 was 3.5years. Dd1 was 15 months but I was pregnant with Dd and I do wonder if my milk changed. I was. Single parent to ds from the start so nobody to take him water or settle him other than me. Breastfeeding worked as a miracle cure for everything so I was happy to continue. You need to do what’s best for you both. The book is a genuine offer so please do let me know if you’d like it and I wish you the best of luck with weaning.

I found this site useful www.emmapickettbreastfeedingsupport.com/blog/weaning-toddler-bob-and-pre-schooler-billie-how-do-you-stop-breastfeeding-an-older-child
Habit stacking, lots of it, sing a short song e.g. baa baa black sheep the whole time you're BF so they've got the association then start to reduce the number of times you sing it so the length of the BF is shorter. Eventually you get to 1 round, so BF for only a few seconds. Then try cuddles and singing with no BF. I also found cheese and a cuddle was a good substitute for BF for a few weeks until they got used to not having anything at night

Can't offer any help..mine was 4 when this stopped!

I would agree with @pjani about getting your dh to take over.

My last dc was like your dc. Still had an evening feed and woke for a comfort feed in the night at nearly19 months. We decided to break the habit when I had to do 2 weeks keeping in touch attendance at work. My dh took over being the one to get up in the night. She never had a bottle so was offered a cup of water in the night.

For the 1st week she still had a small feed before bed, but then my dh took over bedtime and offered a cup of milk in the 2nd week. It worked for us.

I stopped feeding both of mine at around 18 months.

Basically, my approach was to replace feeds with cuddles and other ways of spending time with each other (reading stories, playing etc). Breastfeeding isn't just about getting nutrition for a toddler, it's about closeness and attention, so I thought about other ways to give my DC closeness and attention that weren't breastfeeding.

So if they asked for or would normally have had a feed in the daytime I'd give them a little snack and a drink, and do something like snuggle up with a story. If it was at night I'd give a drink of milk in a cup before bed and just give them lots of cuddles.

I did this until the only feeds we were doing were last thing at night and first thing in the morning. For bedtimes, they'd have a drink from a cup and then snuggle in the nursing chair until asleep/very tired, then into their bed. Wear high neck tops, redirect hands. You can give them a blanket or teddy to hold instead and you can explain that you're not going to feed them now but you will do in the morning. (That's why I kept the morning feeds until last).

Then when they were used to that, the first thing in the morning feeds were really easy to drop because I'd just get them downstairs for an exciting grownup breakfast and they'd barely notice about the feed.

It was fine and easier than I expected.