To feel mortified that I may have said something really offensive?

[Grreel]

I met DH’s colleagues last weekend and I was really anxious about it, it was a formal dinner and they’ve all in high flying roles.

I was chatting to one lovely lady and she showed me some photos of her sons and her daughter. I said they looked lovely and had fantastic white teeth. She just smiled and we continued the conversation. I have been going over the evening and was hoping she would get in touch to arrange a coffee as we had mentioned this before she showed me the photos. I now think I’ve actually said something really offensive as her children were darker skinned (she is white and her husband black). I feel sick to my stomach that in mentioning teeth in that way I’ve said something bad, I remember years ago at school someone mentioning a black pupil’s teeth in the sense that they were bright and they got into trouble. I do have anxiety so I may be overthinking but I feel so mortified and sick that she may have taken my comment in a way that absolutely wasn’t intended. Am I overthinking this?

If it makes you feel any better, I'm a white mother of a mixed black and white DC. A stranger commented on his lovely white teeth at the bus stop just this week. I took at as intended, a compliment. It just shows I take good care of his teeth/ am instilling good dental hygiene habits. You weren't commenting in some Heart of Darkness racist descriptor way, I'm sure!

@Hubblebubble thank you so much, this is reassuring. I’ve felt sick the last few days worrying!

If she is so sensitive that she has taken offence at a completely innocent complement then do you really want to be friends ? It would be such hard work walking in eggshells every conversation

people always make noises about meeting up , I do it with my best friends and then time slips ways and it doesn’t happen , not a reflection at all on my feelings for the person concerned

relax and stop over angsting

You are overthinking yes.

If she doesn't invite you for coffee just assume she's busy and get on with your life.

Stop worrying. I don’t think anyone would take offence from that comment.

It's the Easter holidays, they're either busy or desperately want some downtime. Don't over think it.

Thanks all! I will try and put my worrying to bed and just hope she gets in touch

It was an innocent and kind comment. Stop worrying. I'd be more ashamed of her if she took it the wrong way and was a reason not to contact you

I think you’re just overthinking it because she hasn’t been in touch so now picking apart your conversation to try look for fault. White teeth are commented on in all races, and nice teeth are obvious no matter someone’s skin colour, as are rotten teeth. I’d be very surprised if she’s taken it in any way other than how it was intended.

If she invites you for coffee she does, if she doesn't no big deal. Move on regardless, life is too short.

Wrong post.