To think that my concern about my eyesight is reasonable and the doctor is probably just sexist

[KittensSchmittens]

I found out at a routine optician appointment that I have lost some of my field of vision in one of my eyes. My mother has glaucoma so they have referred me to the hospital to further tests.

I went back in for the results of my mri today, which was thankfully clear. I had the initial eye appointment in January, so it's been a long worrying wait to get the results as some of the things that cause vision loss are potentially very bad news. I'm very relieved.

As there's no obvious cause for why I've gone partially blind in one eye, I asked the consultant what he thought the issue was and he suggested that I seemed very stressed and maybe the vision loss was caused by stress. To be fair I have been stressed - about the vision loss, not before!

I've had the impression throughout the process that, first of all the consultant didn't believe the vision loss was real, then when it was clear on the tests that it was real (optic disc pallor and optic nerve atrophy, apparently), that I was foolish to worry about that and that I had in fact stressed myself blind.

I'm very relieved today that nothing sinister has been found, but also slightly pissed off that I've been made to feel like a silly woman for being concerned about my sight?! AIBU to think that this is a bit shit and if I were a man I would have been taken more seriously?

But they are taking it seriously - the Op has had tests and is continuing to be monitored.

@BarbaricYawp this was the duty ophthalmologist interpreting my mri. I have seen another locum consultant previously - who didn't believe the VF defect was real initially and seemed pissed off that someone my age was cluttering up his glaucoma clinic 🤣 On the second visit he did accept the VF defect was real to be fair to him and ordered the mri and ERG. But he's away now for several months, so I saw a different one this time.

In your position I would be livid. Arrogant twit.
I don't know if a man would have fared better in that situation. Some consultants seem to look down on everyone irrespective of gender.
Stress can cause all kinds of physical problems but probably not optical nerve atrophy.

@Whynotaxthisyear thank you, I am indeed quite bloody furious! Whilst also being very grateful for the clear MRI.

What utter nonsense OP, get a 2nd opinion.

@KittensSchmittens It just doesn't seem very high level to me. A duty ophthalmologist could be an SHO with only a few months of experience in that specialty. I'm not a doctor so I'm not insinuating you've got anything to worry about, I really don't know, and maybe it's nothing. But for various reasons I've had an extended spell of monitoring at my local eye hospital, which is part of a small urban teaching hospital. In any given session they have maybe 8-12 senior ophthalmologists on outpatient duty (consultants or senior registrars) plus juniors (SHOs) working in eye casualty whose work is supervised. I've had such good care. Constant monitoring, weekly appointments to start with, tapering off now to 2-3 monthly only after a year of follow-up. I haven't got the same problem as you so ofc it's not directly comparable, but for anyone - let alone 2 different doctors - to be insinuating that you're wasting their time with what on the face of it sounds like an abnormal presentation just seems so wrong, and I would question their skill and also the culture of the unit. To imply something is psychogenic other than as a diagnosis of total exclusion of everything else just seems wrong in any specialty.

Do you have a decent GP you can talk this through with and get a sense of whether this is good enough and whether they'd refer you somewhere higher tier? Or even a really good optometrist might be able to explain what you're being told and why. But failing all that, if it's possible for you, I think I would pay for a one-off private consultation with a consultant from a specialist eye hospital (e.g. Moorfields) or in an ophthalmology department of a teaching hospital (e.g GSTT) and see what someone who's more motivated and definitely appropriately skilled says.

Wishing you luck.

Aww sorry you went through this.

The hospital I was due to go to for eyes farmed it out to a private options (a place that charges big fee’s to see them but I soon found out why), who had advanced technology, I saw a lovely guy who couldn’t have been more helpful, walked out understanding I was likely stressed when SS kept getting me to do the test that measures eye pressure but not made to feel bad.

But... This seems like a diagnosis. I'm not sure you took away what you needed to from that consultation?

People like me? 🤣😆 you’re a parody. You know I didn’t invent the term medical misogyny right? I also didn’t author any of the research about it but lots of it is available for you to read if you like.

It may or may not be medical misogyny of course but since the OP was there and feels it might have been and we weren’t it’s certainly worth considering rationally isn’t it.

There is also the issue of projection. If you have the mindset you are going to be treated different for being female then ...

Also the feeling of being dismissed could simply be the specialists not wanting to alarm someone or have them think the worst, until they have finished the treatments, tests etc. They do the job day in day out it so I guess they could become less aware of how anxious the patient might feel with it all being new to the patient. Again her own projection making her think they are dismissing her due to being female. That would only apply if every man got great treatment and she didnt.

OP I hope you can find the energy to push for more, and better answers - good luck. I know it can be very draining not be given answers.

The Dr may have been inexperienced, having an off day, tired, distracted, whatever. It’s also very possible that he’s just dismissed a woman with physical symptoms as having a psychological problem. Unfortunately, a known phenomenon which is more common than we would all like to believe.

The fact that @JoyDreamer86 is defending a male Dr she doesn’t know or have experience of, and then, blaming women for seeking out misogyny and therefore experiencing it is very interesting. I’m sure she will deny it but not all misogynists are male.

Seeking out misogyny- you said it.

No one on here knows the facts, neither does OP, she only knows how she feels, so no one here should be trying to suggest her doctor is a misogynist based on the information presented here. I've currently got a male relative having to do so much work trying to get answers to his medical problem. He feels dismissed too.

Nobody here is trying to accuse her doctor of anything it’s just rational to discuss all of the options.

and your bar that there can’t possibly be any misogyny at play until every single man is treated correctly is astonishingly low.

The OP was questioning whether her experience was because she was female. So if you think your male doctor is giving you bad care simply because you are female are you not then accusing him of being misogynistic/sexist.

The op was considering the possibility and wanted to discuss it. That’s a reasonable position given the well documented problem of medical misogyny. It’s ok to discuss things and consider all outcomes.

To leap to words like ‘accuse’ with the premise being that ‘accusing’ a doctor is unacceptable is not a helpful way to promote better care for anyone.

Exactly a discussion. I tend to look at things logically so my advice was not to jump to the conclusion he was being sexist. The treatment and tests arent even finished yet. I dont think it helps to add any more negativity to a situation- unless of course you have strong grounds to suspect sexism. The fact that misogyny exists is not enough.

@JoyDreamer86 why so defensive?

Your argument is now, you are ‘logical’ therefore the other (female) posters are illogical. You might need to learn the first rule of holes!

It’s not uncommon for women to be dismissed simply for being a woman. It’s also unfortunately not uncommon for women to defend men because they have also absorbed societal norms.

The OP is allowed to wonder if misogyny is at play. The answer is simply, we don’t know.

To defend a Dr you’ve never met so vehemently, seems a little odd.

More compassion for the woman in this situation might make you seem a little less misogynistic.

What do you think she should have taken away?

That's not a diagnosis. Stress that came after the vision loss caused the vision loss due to a "functional issue"?
It's meaningless nonsense.

No I just know how my brain works as an explanation of my thought process on topics like this.

If I 'defend' anyone its because I wouldn't accuse someone of being sexist for the reasons OP has given.

The sympathy exists in relation to her eye problems, but to talk about sexism that's another issue all together. And the fact you would accuse me of being misogynistic for having a different view or opinion on how to deal with something just shows how your mind works and it really helps no one.

It's a lazy diagnosis. I've had doctors tell me they have no idea what's wrong. Obviously but what I want to hear but I'd rather hear that than being told it's stress

In one case he made me an appointment the next day with someone who has better knowledge. In the other case I've been sent for more tests and she's demented to get to the bottom of what's going on

"someone with better knowledge" is usually someone willing to ask you to pay for more tests

I'm in the UK and this was NHS. The doctor knew what it was but the treatment given didn't work

It’s not really a diagnosis?
Functional symptoms are physical symptoms where there is no obvious physical cause.

Hey @KittensSchmittens, I've a similar issue, although mine is both eyes. I've sent you a PM, hope that's ok.