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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

P E teacher. Please help.

237 replies

Chickencuddle · 15/04/2025 21:42

I phoned in today about my daughter being denied her inhaler during PE. I asked to speak to head of pastoral care. But I got a phone call back from PEt teacher who flat out denied and basically said my dd is lying. She also said she wasn't working hard enough to be out of breath or even breaking a sweat. I said this didn't matter and she needs her inhaler. She said she didn't say she needed her inhaler.
I felt so bad and actually considered if my dd had lied although would be so so out of character for her. I spoke to dd who was shocked and upset about what the PE teacher had said. She insured me she was telling the truth and said her friend had been with her and also she had spoken to a classroom assistant after teacher told her she couldn't get it telling her what teacher had said and classroom assistant said if she didn't feel better soon she had her permission to go get it. But she told me she jyst dealt with the breathlessness and got her inhaler after PE.

Teacher mentioned that changing rooms are 10 minutes away from hall and that dd has never brought her inhaler. I said maybe that could be mentioned that next time she brings it with her. She said that needs to be something I tell her as she has enough kids to deal with. I said that's fine but I wasn't to know it was so far away. I'm only just hearing that now. Also why is she telling me this if dd actually didn't ask?

She has said mean things to dd before denied her toilet which I had to phone for. I didn't want this to be a big thing just wanted PE teacher to let dd use inhaler. But now feels like a big thing and feel like I have to clear dds name as head of year bas spoken to PE reacher and obviouslt believes this as she told her to ohone me i assume.. I believe dd. the details and things she was saying and way she was saying it. Plus I phoned friends mum and explained and asked to speak to her dd. Her dd said exactly what mine said.

What do I do now?

OP posts:
Original poster
Chickencuddle · 15/04/2025 21:47

Oh also teacher kept mentioning she was bringing her grade up to an A as she was doing so well. I was like...why is that relevant

OP posts:
Brentinger · 15/04/2025 21:58

Sounds like she has a lot to deal with and probably isn't taking it out on your dd, even though it may seem like it.

Perhaps a gentle reminder to her, in writing, that your dd needs to bring her inhaler with her to class and that you have also reminded her? That you appreciate her help with the matter etc etc?

PE teachers get really fed up with students trying to get out of being active - fake toilet breaks, injuries, illnesses etc and can come down hard on the ones who need genuine help.

bardosya · 15/04/2025 22:02

Covered PE recently due to shortage of staff and you’d laugh at the number of excuses you get told by children for not doing PE. Also it’s your daughters responsibility to carry her inhaler if she needs it, teachers have to deal with so much more than reminding children, that’s the role of parents.

Original poster
Chickencuddle · 15/04/2025 22:03

I get it. But I've already sent a note explaining she's had pneumonia and has inflamed airways and reduced lung capacity etc
I've also phoned in before as the written note was ignored and now it's happened again.

I sympathise but I feel like of my dd needs her inhaler there's not really a reason she shouldn't be able to have it?

OP posts:
Original poster
Chickencuddle · 15/04/2025 22:04

Again dd asked to go get it and was told no she couldn't. Yes she can bring it with her next time but I'm talking just about this one time. She needed her inhaler and was told no ..?

OP posts:
spongebunnyfatpants · 15/04/2025 22:05

The pe teacher needs training on asthma, doing sport and being out of breath is completely different to needing your inhaler.

I have asthma, I get out of breath from exercise but I don't need my inhaler.

If your daughter feels she needs her inhaler then she should be allowed to take it, it is not for the pe teacher to decide, especially if she is not a first aider/medically trained.

She has no right to deny your daughter her inhaler.

I'd insist that your daughter carries her inhaler with her/ has it in the area that she is in (not 10 minutes away) at all times during pe.

Hankunamatata · 15/04/2025 22:08

Its your dd responsibility to bring inhaler to lesson especially if the changing room is 10mins there and back probably wasting a good 20 plus mins of PE lesson.
So many kids makes excuses and try to bunk off

I would be reminding dd to take her inhaler with her and not leave it in her bag. And not do anything else

anonymoususer9876 · 15/04/2025 22:08

Does the school have a general policy about how health issues are managed when on school site? Would be worth checking this out.

Does your child have a health care plan acknowledging they have asthma and what the responsibilities are regarding herself and staff?
See more here for further info: https://aafa.org/asthma/living-with-asthma/school-health-care-plans-for-asthma-and-allergies/

(In secondary school I would expect the child to bring their own pump and administer as they need to. I would expect the teacher to allow this at any point. If the school are finding that their pupils are not doing this, then school can ensure an emergency inhaler in a First Aid Kit can be taken to the PE area by the PE teacher for emergencies such as this. This is what we do in primary school where I work.)

Original poster
Chickencuddle · 15/04/2025 22:11

Having asthma is new to her. She had pneumonia and this is the result of it. She is struggling alot. Yes I've spoken to school and they are aware.
I understand and will talk to dd about keeping inhaler on hwe which she is very good at doing everywhere else. I think she just didn't think she could carry it in PE.
Also doesn't change the fact she should have been allowed to go get it.

OP posts:
oustedbymymate · 15/04/2025 22:13

Flip side of story...

DD is allowed back to changing rooms being absent from the lesson for 20 mins. Assuming 1 hr lesson that's 1/3 iof the lesson.

Whilst in changing room pupils 2 phone goes missing....

What then? Who will be blamed?

Or DD having not taken responsibility for her own medical condition and brought the necessary inhaler has an episode in changing rooms unsupervised and is very poorly. Then what? Should the whole class be taken back to changing rooms to accommodate DD? How does the teacher safeguard 30 kids?

Your DD needs to take more responsibility for her health condition

Original poster
Chickencuddle · 15/04/2025 22:16

If you want to play that game let's think about another flipside.
Dd doesn't get inhaler and dies....
She's 11. She forgot her inhaler. It's new. This isn't the only issue but most concerning.

OP posts:
oustedbymymate · 15/04/2025 22:17

Presumably if she is at risk of that there is an inhaler stored in medical facilities in school no?

Original poster
Chickencuddle · 15/04/2025 22:19

Nope not yet as only recently got prescription for this inhaler and not been able to get back to doctors to request a spare. Also if they can go get the emergency inhaler why not this one?

OP posts:
Gcsunnyside23 · 15/04/2025 22:20

As an asthmatic, especially one recently so sick, your daughter should have used it before class as prevention and brought it with her just in case. The teacher probably thought she was trying to bunk off for 20 mins. I've asthma and it was drummed into me over and over by my mum to always have my inhaler nearby in these situations. If the p.e teacher didn't know she has asthma I presume she doesn't usually have her inhaler with her, I know you sent a note but maybe it didn't reach the teacher. I'm not agreeing with the teacher, your daughter absolutely should have been allowed to go get it if she needs it but really your daughter should have her inhaler on her as it's not much good 10 mins away. I can need mine even from going from warm overly heated room to really cold outdoor air so a teacher would assume I was making excuses of hadn't done much exercise at that point.

Original poster
Chickencuddle · 15/04/2025 22:22

It can turn into an emergency real fast. People still die from asthma. You don't play with breathing. If you're denying her getting her inhaler you're putting her at risk.she should have took her inhaler..but she didn't? So when she asks the teacher he responsibilty is then on teacher. She is aware she is struggling and needing her medicstion which she forgot. But because she forgot it's OK for teacher to deny her to go get it.

OP posts:
Gcsunnyside23 · 15/04/2025 22:22

Missed the update that this is new, use it as a lesson to your daughter how important it is to manage her medication

oustedbymymate · 15/04/2025 22:22

Becuase usually the emergency one is stored with main first aid for an emergency....

I get why you would be annoyed but in reality your DD needs to learn to take responsibility. Maybe she will now.

Original poster
Chickencuddle · 15/04/2025 22:23

Yeah that's great. Next time she will remember. She even said that to me. But for now my issue is she has accused dd of lying to save her own butt. What are my next steps

OP posts:
Ohthatsabitshit · 15/04/2025 22:28

Talk to the head of year, that’s totally unacceptable.

Cmq · 15/04/2025 22:28

i regularly have to educate parents, schools too sort of, asking for ‘extra inhaler/epipen to keep at school’ these are emergency medications and should not be stored anywhere. You need access to them in seconds not waiting for someone to trek to the office for them. They should be with the child at all times Including too and from school as they could have an asthma attack/anaphylaxis on the journey. This is something to train your DD on.

I can see how for you it was a poor decision from teacher but as others have said it was a no win for the teacher.

Schools can purchase inhalers for emergency use so if any feedback you may wish to suggest this for them to be available at the PE department for any further incidents of forgetfulness.

Exactfare · 15/04/2025 22:31

As someone diagnosed with asthma in my late 30s I think people are being harsh with a newly diagnosed 11 year old

If speak to school and make sure they understand the seriousness of asthma ans the importance of the inhaler

My son's primary and at 9 the school would proactively ask him did he need it when he was bad but maybe that's the difference with secondary 🤷‍♀️

Teacaketravesty · 15/04/2025 22:31

I’m surprised how many people think this is ok/blame your 11yo.

idk if you can do much more than warn your daughter this teacher’s a liar and to keep her distance. I think she was saying she’d give her an A to mollify you.

I would make sure your girl has pockets in everything she wears for PE so she can keep an inhaler on her. And ask your GP for at least 2 more inhalers. I hope she recovers fully soon.

AlisounOfBath · 15/04/2025 22:34

As an ex-teacher, this PE teacher sounds like a moron. There’s no way I’d fuck around about inhalers or EpiPens etc. No kid is going to croak on my watch thank you very much. If it happened repeatedly, I’d say “you need to get to grips with this” and enlist her form teacher and parents to help her manage it. So the teacher was wrong.

However, I also know that in a busy classroom (I count the sports hall or pitches as being classrooms), miscommunication happens easily. I’ve had a kid say “you said no” when I had actually said “just wait a minute until I get the class settled”. Neither party was lying - just hearing different things.

So a teacher was potentially unfair to your kid. It happens. Absolutely nothing will be gained by making a complaint to defend your daughter’s honour or whatever. DH got a detention for talking once - it wasn’t him. It still rankles now because it was the only one he ever got. But too bad, these things happen. Make sure DD has her inhaler on her person, remind her every time it’s a PE day, and chalk up the unfairness to life’s rich tapestry.

OhDeerohDeerie · 15/04/2025 22:35

Formal complaint.

children have died in school for want of a reliever inhaler.

your child should have it, but as she didn’t her need to take a puff of inhaler is a priority and the need to create a consequence for that comes second

KittyPup · 15/04/2025 22:36

Your next steps are to parent your child. You’ve spoken to the teacher - she has a different take on the situation to the 11 year old. What’s done is done…your daughter will now take responsibility and make sure she has the inhaler. The fact that you rang the other parent to get the statement from another 11 year old speaks volumes. Email the teacher to say dd will have it on her at all
times going forward and will use it as and when she sees fit. Why do you need next steps? What exactly do you hope to achieve? It’s as if you have nothing better to do and must prove a point to make sure you feel better and that your dd is somehow vindicated. Just move on.

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