Finances post baby

[Honeyx1]

I am on SMP so my husband is fronting all the bills. I purchase whatever the baby requires & whatever we need for the house / groceries.

I am going back to work part time so this arrangement is going to stay, with my husband giving me x amount each month on top of what I earn.

Is this a normal way of doing things or should our money be collective?

the question is, are you happy with the arrangement? The post would suggest not?

If it works, fine.

Do your sums. Will you have savings and fun money of your own or will everything you have go to costs while he maintains a level of free personal income that you have no access to? If this is the case, further discussion is required.

It depends, you should both be contributing to bills and groceries, if he earns considerably more than you then it makes sense he gives you a 'top up' to make it fair.

Do you both have 'fun money'? If he has £500 left after essentials and you have £50 then it's not fair.

Pooled money works well for a lot of people, less faff too. Maybe trial it?

Is this a normal way of doing things or should our money be collective?

Well, there is no normal or rules on how this 'should' be done. You need to choose a way that you are both happy with. We have always just had one account which both our salaries go into and all the bills come out of-that works for us.

That’s what me and DH do and it works for us. I get enough to cover essentials plus a bit on top, then I work part time which tops up my ‘fun’ fund. Hubby earns enough that he isn’t restricted money wise by doing this so there’s no resentment on either side.

Find a way that works for your partnership as there’s no real ‘normal’

Not normal for us. We pool all money for family spending and each adult gets the same amount of money for personal spending.

The money should all go into one pot. All the bills should be paid. Money should go into joint savings account for an emergency and the rest should be split as fun money. You are not working p/t for fun. You are doing it to care for your joint child. Don't make all the sacrifices to your career, pension, future career advancement and get fucked over and left skint in the process. If he doesn't want a partnership then you're better to go back to work F/T

We pool all money. Whether I’m a SAHM or working, all goes into the family pot.

I am not sure there is ever a right or normal way when it comes to money.

Everything in our house goes into one pot. All bills are then paid from the joint account. Anything we want is also paid from this. There is no this is mine/this is yours. If either of us want something we buy it (obviously within reason).

Will paying for childcare be your responsibility?

Depends what you're happy with and what you're both comfortable with.

There's no one-size fits all.

DH pays the mortgage, bills and any big expenses like car insurance etc

I pay half the food bills, childcare and as I’m with my DS more I end up paying more for him for clothing etc

We both put into joint savings funds and a joint savings for our DC

It works for us.