Please help me survive a 9hr flight with my 4mo!

[CaptainCabinets]

4mo DS and I are flying long-haul next week and panic is setting in. We already have lots of the stuff we need at our destination as flying to see family so can afford to travel fairly light. It’s a daytime flight and DS isn’t a great napper so he will probably be awake for most of the flight. Practical stuff I’ve already got:

• Very detailed, trip-specific letter from DP agreeing to our travel plans as DS has both surnames
• Bassinet seat chosen

Please can you share your tips for flying alone with a small baby? He loves nursery rhymes and just me chatting to him, but I can’t imagine our neighbours would enjoy listening to me sing/waffle on for 9 hours. He’s BF so at least feeding is covered, but economy seats aren’t the roomiest. He is hit and miss with a dummy (only uses for about 5 mins when he’s falling asleep) but will pack a couple in case he wants it.

What sort of things can I do to occupy him that aren’t too noisy/don’t encroach on other people’s space and peace? Would a member of cabin crew hold him for a couple of mins if I need a wee (whilst I’d happily hold a stranger’s baby, I wouldn’t want to ask a neighbour in case they felt pressured!)

I’m a fairly seasoned long-haul traveller, but this is my first time doing it with a little one in tow!

Are you bringing a sling or something else in case you dint get the bassinet? It’s not guaranteed and they often don’t have enough on board. 4 months is a difficult age as they are awake enough to need to be entertained but too young to play with toys by themselves. I’d pack a big blanket and make a little nest at your feet and lay him down there for a bit/prop him up and put some some toys there for him to play with. It might give your arms a break.

Take more nappies than you think you’ll need, and several outfit changes for both of you. DD had a HUGE poo when we flew, just as we took off - apparently it’s quite common due to the change in pressure. Have your change mat to hand with wipes etc and an outfit change so you aren’t faffing with a bit change bag in the loo - I took a canvas tote bag inside my main change bag.

If you’re BF, take a big water bottle to fill up before you board.

Entertainment wise - some muslins which you can play peekaboo with? A ribbon wand for dangling and playing? Some favourite books/sensory flash cards? Lots of walking up and down smiling at people.

If they are comfortable in a carrier/sling, brilliant. I have been asked to remove it for take off/landing twice, and allowed to keep it on once (same airline) - not sure about official policies.

Yep, we’ve been practicing with a fabric wrap sling in various different styles just in case! I’ve never seen many babies when I’ve flown that route (lots of times!) so I’m hoping there isn’t a whole crèche on board when we fly so we can have a bassinet

Good tip re the blanket nest, thank you!

Are you able to tie the fabric wrap whilst standing in a very, very confined space? Most sling libraries will rent carriers out for eg a fortnight at a time.

Also, with the bassinet, you won’t be able to use it if the fasten seatbelt sign is on, which inevitably will coincide with food service. You should be able to ask cabin crew to hold your meal back for you so you’re not juggling baby and food together.

Is he a placid baby? There isn't much you can do, hopefully it goes well.

Good point, I’ve managed to tie it whilst standing between two closely parked cars but economy seats are minuscule! We do have a structured carrier but it isn’t very comfy to sit down in.

I’ve had to order a special meal as DS has CMPA so it’ll probably be coming out first, but I’ll ask for it to be held back.

I took mine to Australia at this age and it was fine. Everyone was really helpful. I had a JoJo buggy book that did different textures and crinkled pages that provided hours of entertainment.
How are you feeding? I was combination feeding and couldn’t be bothered to take a pump. The mother of 9 sitting next to me kept helping herself to the bottles in my bag because she thought my dd “looked hungry” and I very nearly ran out. There was no mechanism to sterilise bottles (I finished up using washed but not sterilised) and I had assumed that there would be a microwave I could use in the lounge. If you are staying in hotels etc. and moving around then I had a bottle of washing up liquid designed for milk that made rinsing bottles in hand sinks much easier.

The most useful thing was taking her in a sling. It let me carry her about easily whilst leaving my hands free to get passports etc.
I borrowed a pram when I reached Australia. If you can do similar I wouldn’t bother taking my own out.

He is a very fussy baby at times, but the offer of a boob is always enough to calm him down. I think I’m going to be getting my tits out a lot on that flight

Also this goes against Mumsnet usual advice if all else fails the sensory dancing fruits is good for that age on YouTube if the plane has WiFi.

The dancing fruits have already come to our house, don’t worry! It’s the only way I can get any housework done as both DS and DDog are mesmerised for 10 mins while I’m hoovering (and the music is unbelievably catchy )

Take disposable change mats & have a small change bag handy that you can grab & go to the loos with rather than having to get up to the lockers all the time. Disposables are just so much easier on the plane.

Take your nursing pillow as well. It gives your arms a break if he’s sleeping on your lap.

Ignore the advice about making a nest at your feet, the crew will ask you to pick him up within minutes. They definitely won’t allow that plus it’s super unsafe if there’s turbulence.

I took a carrier and a wrap on our first long haul flight and didn’t use the wrap. The carrier was useful for the airport & boarding but it was easier to pop my child on the feeding pillow (a bean bag style) when I wanted to go hands free seated.

Even if not usually a "sleeper" I think you will find the hum and white noise of the plane tends to make babies sleep better than they usually do.

They are definitely easier at that age than a year later.

I'd much rather listen to you waffle on and sing a bit in a muted tone than him scream! Good luck!

Hope so, he’s knocked out within seconds whenever we drive anywhere! Sometimes we go for a drive just to force a nap if he’s particularly grouchy

Pack each set of clothes (I would take 3 or 4 sets for the baby and and extra set for you) in separate sandwich bags with a nappy then you just need to grab a plastic bag and the wipes rather than hunting for a vest or socks or whatever in those tiny toilets.
take more nappies then you ever dream you’ll need.
let the routine (if you have one) slide, it’s just a day, just go with the flow and get back on track the next day.
Dont be afraid to walk around with the baby.
Drink lots of water if you’re feeding you’ll get more dehydrated than usual, also don’t be suprised if baby wants to feed more.
Offer the breast on take off and land inf, sucking helps with the pressure build up in the ears.

Is the flight essential? no offence intended here but I don’t think it’s a good idea to take such a young, tiny baby onto a 9hr flight?? I didn’t even consider it before at least 6/7/8 months and even then, not 9hrs! For the baby’s sake but also for the fellow passengers’ sakes! Yes of course it’s allowed by the airlines and they provide bassinets in the bulkhead row but they have to. It doesn’t make it a suitable environment for a new baby. Also a 4 month old baby’s ears popping just seems unnecessarily cruel to me in my opinion. Not to mention being in a pressurised and therefore unventilated metal tube with hundreds of other people and all their germs etc. Their immune systems just aren’t developed enough for that level of risk; That’s why dummies/bottles & toys for newborns all need to be sterilised. And no, breast milk will not provide the amount of defence needed for that petri dish of germs etc. I would definitely reconsider. I actually work for an airline and so I see quite literally hundreds & hundreds of people daily getting on flights and I would say at least 20-30% of them are very noticeably unwell with colds etc (The percentage being even higher in autumn & winter of course).

In your carryon
Take a change of top for you (and emergency leggings as well) in case of vomit getting all over you.

Take at least 3 changes of outfit for ds..babygrows with the least complicated fasteners for the win
I would package up a mini changing kit to take to the loo as they are so small my whole carryon bag didnt really fit in there..so a pouch with a nappy, wipes and and cream..then would refill it once I got back to my seat to be ready for the next excursion
Be really strategic with your carryon, I am guessing you will get 2 pieces, one to go above and one smaller one for under the seat in front. If you can find a bag that opens up fully for your smaller option it makes it easier to find things in it, rummaging through a bag while sat in economy with an infant on your knee is v difficult

Pack everything into packing cubes in your carryon..so toys in a blue cube, nappies and wipes in a red cube, chocolate and snacks for you in a yellow cube..then its easier to just yank out the color you know has what you want in it.

Take some sealable bags with you for the smelly baby clothes with the poonami or vomit on them, so you can seal then and stuff them in the bottom of your bag, take a few other small bags to use for rubbish bits and pieces

Take a reliable water bottle that wont errupt all over you when the pressure changes, you can fill it after security

Take snacks for you..eating the meal might be tricky

Try and avoid squeaky toys, but crinkly books and things that click and squish are excellent. If you can find a way of tethering them to something like the seat belt, then it will help retrieval when they get dropped or thrown etc

You can walk up and down the aisles and chat to the air crew, take ds to look out of the window in the lobby area, you dont have to stay in your seat unless it is bumpy

Make sure you have a specific pocket for your passport, money and boarding pass that zips and only ever put them in there..mislaying something important is likely and horrific, so be very vigilant about that

You will want to feed at take off and landing, but if ds is a ‘quick feeder and then done’, dont start until you are speeding down the runway at take off and he is starting to fuss on the descent. It can take a long time to get the plane up and down, and you dont want to waste the feeding time on a moment when he isnt in need of swallowing

security is a pain in the bum, there is no way around it. Make sure you know the rules for the airports your are going through, arrange your liquids etc for easy access, and then just take your time and dont get flustered

Have fun, it will probably be a lovely trip

It's a shame there isn't more information available when you book a flight. I'd happily book the seat next to you.& hold him for you, read books to him, whatever, if you wanted me to & you could sing/waffle on to him all you like & play whatever baby video/music keeps him happy.

And other people could book the seat furthest away from us🤣

just convince yourself whoever is sitting next to you is one of my clones and they're loving every minute of🤣🤣

Hope it goes well and you enjoy your wee holiday!!

Try a "mei tai" if you can get one in time. Fabric wrap style but much more space economical

This is actually a much easier she than traveling with a toddler. Assuming you have a bassinet you'll find the process easy.

With this approach you'll be fine!

Nothing beats boobs, for a BF baby. Just BF loads and keep him close as much as possible.

Hopefully he'll mostly sleep and it'll be a non event. Good luck!

A nine hour flight with a BF baby sounds like a dream to me right now! Feed, cuddle, sing, watch movies, sleep. Amazing. 😁

(I second someone above though who said get a carrier - easier than a wrap in that kind of environment! I love my Ergobaby, I've also borrowed a friend's Baby Bjorn which was also great.)

Try and feed on take off and landing to help with change of pressure but also be aware that screaming will also help (though harder of you/other passengers).

With narrow seats a sling or muslin something can make you feel a bit more private for feeding on a side with a neighbour. A pillow is also great idea if you can carry it.

Yes to several little change packs and change of top for you.

I left my passport on a plane once (though remembered the baby). Was a bit annoying.

Flew UK to Oz just me and a 4 month old, flight attendants along the way were MORE than happy to hold bubba whenever I went to the loo. One granny aged passenger next to me held him while I ate some of my airline meals.

It was all much easier than I had feared. I was well prepared in terms of spare outfits and many (many) more nappies than I might need, in case of flight delays.

DC vomited once during one of the flights which he had never ever done before so that was a surprise. But nothing that wet wipes and a change of babygro and outfit couldn’t fix.

With respect, I didn’t ask for opinions on whether or not we should go. It’s already booked and we fly next week.