Couple friends splitting up - can you stay friends with both?

[BigDahliaFan]

Long standing friend of 30 years or so. His current girlfriend I know really well now - and, after, 12 years they are now splitting up. I'd like to stay friends with her.

But ... can you stay friends with both?

Yes I think so

Yes, I have in the past.

I think the only time it gets messy is if the split is particularly acrimonious.

I think so, just be sensitive about it. I’m still friendly with my sister’s first long term boyfriend.

I think you can stay friends with both so long as you make it clear you are not going to get involved with talking about the other half of the ex couple and you aren't going to talk about their past relationship.
And you would need to be sure each of them were aware that your stance was the same with both of them.

I think it depends on why they split and how amicable they are with each other

I think as long as you stay neutral it'll be fine.

Yes.

But I feel it's important to ensure you keep each partner's business private going forward and don't take sides...

Yes, hopefully. If it was horrendously acrimonious and one party was clearly abusive etc then obviously I'd pick sides. But otherwise I'd hope I could just be friends separately with them and hopefully their new partners.

I wouldn't want to be a go between though, listening to one moaning constantly about the other or being grilled on what they were up to.

I have. She has made the odd dig about him on SM but for the most part, neither talk about each other

Depend on the people really, we have remained friends with some couple that split, but others not, I think just takes them back to that time, and they prefer to leave it in the past and make new friends and move on with new relationships.