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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think letting kids eat McDonald’s weekly is borderline neglect?

350 replies

BeAlertBeaker · 14/04/2025 09:26

It’s not “a treat” if it’s regular.

OP posts:
MagdaLenor · 14/04/2025 10:23

@BeAlertBeaker where do you think you fall down as a parent?

ConstanceM · 14/04/2025 10:23

Neglect is NOT feeding them at ALL. FFS.

Maaate · 14/04/2025 10:23

cestlavielife · 14/04/2025 10:21

Are you also measuring number of frozen chicken nuggets or fish fingers and peas at home each week? Context is everything. One macd after a week of organic humus?

Have you seen how much oil is in humus?

For shame!

Hwi · 14/04/2025 10:23

Quiethouse · 14/04/2025 10:19

Someone that is overly obsessed with healthy food that labels food 'good' and 'evil' is much more likely to raise a DC that develops an eating disorder than someone that introduces fast food as a normal part of life with an otherwise healthy diet.

Excellent!

user1492757084 · 14/04/2025 10:24

Yes, I think it is neglectful to not inform children of the full range of take-away options. McDonalds every week, NO.
One take-away per week = not neglectful.

Expose them also to .. Fish and Chips, Pizza, Chinese, Vietnamese, Mexican, local burger shop, Fried Chicken, Sushi, Cheese Toasties, Baked Bean Jaffles and Bananas in a Buttered Roll.

That said, a take-away coffee is now acceptable almost every day for adults! Baby Chinos are on the menu at least once per week for many children. To splurge on hot milk drinks - is that equally neglectful? YES, the kids should be also be exposed to their parents making very good cups of tea.

Hobnobswantshernameback · 14/04/2025 10:24

Wondering where the OPs unneglected kids whilst she's fannying about on here during the school holidays

Mylegishangingoff · 14/04/2025 10:24

BeAlertBeaker · 14/04/2025 10:20

You’re probably right, no parent gets everything perfect and I’m not claiming to be the exception. We all have blind spots and areas we could improve on.

But acknowledging that no one is perfect shouldn’t mean we stop having honest conversations about habits that have become culturally accepted but might still carry long-term consequences, especially when children are involved and don’t have control over those choices.

This isn’t about policing individual parents. It’s about questioning whether “normal” always equals “harmless.” I think it’s possible to reflect on that without pretending we’re flawless ourselves.

Show quote history

What long term consequences do you forsee from eating out/getting take away once a week. You have to bear in mind too that tastes will probably change as they grow and the once a week McDs would probably turn into once a week eating out in general if we are talking about habits sticking rather than them having a happy meal every week for ever more.

Gloriia · 14/04/2025 10:24

It's nothing to do with common people. There is an obesity epidemic, taking kids weekly for a 'treat' to a junk food place in encouraging shit eating habits don't some of you realise that?

Go occasionally.

IVFmumoftwo · 14/04/2025 10:24

Neglect would be not feeding them.

Alwayswonderedwhy · 14/04/2025 10:25

It's unhealthy but far from neglect. Realistically there will be many families that think it's perfectly normal.

MostlyGhostly · 14/04/2025 10:26

LePetitMaman · 14/04/2025 09:35

Honestly, don't be so bloody stupid.

Is McDonald's anything other than junk food. What's that then? All fried food? Anything convenience based as opposed to health based?

I had fish and chips nearly every Friday for several years. Because we took my pony to the beach and we'd eat some while she was settling in the horsebox for the drive home. Dripping in grease it was. And glorious.

I don't think anyone looked at me, sitting on the sea wall, in my jodhpurs, plowing through a portion of chips the size of my head and thought "that poor child, borderline neglect."

Is it different if I ate the chips inside a building with an M on the front?

That would have been my absolute dream childhood, you must have had a blast

Hobnobswantshernameback · 14/04/2025 10:26

Posters agreeing with the OP on this thread is like a game of Mumsnet bingo
plus ca change

ICanTellYouMissMe · 14/04/2025 10:26

One crappy meal out of 21 each week is not neglect.

PiriPiriMenopause · 14/04/2025 10:27

My kids go to school in the middle of a city, and I am unable to force feed them with a lovely M&S platter of avocado chicken and quinoa every day.

They instead choose Macdonalds or Greggs! Their choice, but at least they’re eating I guess. I could stop giving them lunch money, but would that be more abusive than them eating macdonalds?

pictoosh · 14/04/2025 10:27

Think you lost your audience from the off by deliberately choosing the phrase 'borderline neglect'. You were being superior before you'd even begun.

It's not borderline neglect and you know it. Why say it?

helgut · 14/04/2025 10:27

Firstly, it depends what the rest of their diet is like, but I wouldn’t call it neglect. Poor decision making, ignorance, laziness maybe, but not neglect.

AthWat · 14/04/2025 10:28

nightmarepickle2025 · 14/04/2025 10:10

Hahaha I love Mumsnet, where one Mcds and bedsheets only washed once a fortnight is considered worthy of social services intervention.

Except by 84% to 16% at the moment, it isn't.

Stanleybeach · 14/04/2025 10:28

We all have blind spots

I think your blind spot is the 20 other meals a week where the kids are eating fine, and your inability to see how that will be the predominant influence on how they eat, rather than the one meal in 21. You are also missing that this one meal is likely to be a happy family treat together, and these happy family moments are also really important for children’s emotional growth and brain development.

I don’t buy your arguments at all and the way you are thinking about food is actually unbalanced and unhealthy.

Original poster
BeAlertBeaker · 14/04/2025 10:28

Timeforabiscuit · 14/04/2025 10:09

You are spectacularly missing the point of the role fast food plays in lives where;

Two parents need to work to maintain a household
A cost of living crises pushing both food and fuel costs up
A lack of support systems more generally for working families

What fucking nirvana do you think the majority of households live in?

And what are your answers? What do you think parents should do instead?

I agree it comes down to parent choice, and sometimes the ones available are sub optimal.

But I don't believe you've ever set foot in a farm foods or Iceland, I don't believe you have an ounce of life experience outside of your privilege and I can't take your opinion seriously if all you've got is a bleating soap box.

LOTS of things we do day to day are poor choices, even now typing this message is a lost opportunity for yoga or gardening - yet here we are, going through life the best way we can but I'm afraid I've no time for naive people who offer nothing practical.

Show quote history

I get that this topic touches a nerve and I hear your frustration about the bigger structural issues families are facing. I’m not blind to them, nor am I pretending that every parent has endless time, money, or energy to make ideal choices.

My post wasn’t about blame. It was about asking where we draw the line between what’s understandable and what we’ve stopped questioning because something being common or convenient doesn’t automatically make it good for kids.

You’re right that we need more support systems, better access to nutritious food, and affordable convenience that isn’t ultra-processed. But acknowledging that shouldn’t make it taboo to talk about the cumulative impact of those “sub-optimal” choices either.

And just for the record, it’s possible to be both privileged in some ways and observant of systemic issues. I’m not here to preach, just to provoke thought. If that came off the wrong way, that’s on me. But I’m not backing away from the conversation.

OP posts:
Hobnobswantshernameback · 14/04/2025 10:29

Ultra processed

I call house

Maaate · 14/04/2025 10:30

Well ive been inspired to watch some of the Catherine Tate "middle class family" sketches

Would anyone like a Gooseberry and Cinnamon Yoghurt?

yeesh · 14/04/2025 10:30

Neglect? Grow up. Child neglect is a very serious issue not if they get a fucking McDonalds too often.

notedbiscuits · 14/04/2025 10:30

Never understood the attraction of McDs. I find them mediocre. Nicer burgers about.

Starlight1984 · 14/04/2025 10:30

PiriPiriMenopause · 14/04/2025 10:27

My kids go to school in the middle of a city, and I am unable to force feed them with a lovely M&S platter of avocado chicken and quinoa every day.

They instead choose Macdonalds or Greggs! Their choice, but at least they’re eating I guess. I could stop giving them lunch money, but would that be more abusive than them eating macdonalds?

I was just going to say this! There is a Mcdonalds near my work and every day at lunchtime it is full of kids from the local high school!!!

flatwhitestar · 14/04/2025 10:31

Think that you
probably need to think on how it sits in the bigger picture of their nutrition. And while you’re at it maybe hoik those judgy pants out of your backside!🍟🍔

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