DC moving far away - how did you cope?

[AusBoundDD]

I’m a single mum with a 20yo DD currently on a gap year. She has just returned from Australia after spending 6 months there on a working holiday visa. She travelled the whole country, really had the time of her life and has absolutely fallen in love with Melbourne & Sydney to the point that she is now determined to move once she graduates and builds up a bit of experience. Her degree (starts in Sept) will be in a healthcare role where UK-Australia immigration is very common so this is certainly achievable.

AIBU to wonder how parents cope with their DC living so far away though? She’s my only child and I found 6 months away from her really tough! We’re very close and I missed having her around so much. The sheer distance and cost of flights is immense so even visits would be restricted to once/twice a year at most. I’m really proud of her and absolutely do not want her to know my feelings, it’s her life and I want her to go and chase her own dreams but I can’t help but feel so sad at the thought of things!

Oh it is a wrench when they leave to live their lives

time to start thinking about the rest of your life now. To focus on you, building a support network of friends, developing hobbies you may have neglected over the last 20 years

It’s hard. One of mine lives in Azerbaijan. I miss him everyday. It’s just geography though. We video call weekly and message most days.

You could move there too eventually, as she is your only child you'd meet the "balance of family" criteria which gives you more points towards a visa.

My son might be moving a long way away and it wasn't until a friend said it would be hard for me that I thought about it from my point of view. He's not lived at home full time for five years but comes home often. I'll just be thrilled for him if he gets this new job and we have face time.

No experience but I have two DC who in due course I feel will do similar. So hard.

I always feel terrible when I read things like this as I've spent many years living away from family but didn't have an awareness of how difficult this would be for my parents until I had my own children and my sister moved down under for a period.
What I will say is :

1. your daughter is still quite young and many things may change between now and when she finishes her degree. I had my heart set on living in a European country after graduating but i didn't enjoy working life there.
2. Even if your daughter lives in Australia long term you can still have a great relationship. Although I just spend holidays with my family we have incredible quality times together and keep in touch constantly with what's app. Who knows whet the future will hold and I wish you both well.

Ahhh that’s tough, dd travelled too and had made noises about a year in Australia. They have bought a house 40min down the road so hoping they stay local (I wouldn’t try to stop them as I want the best for them but I would be gutted) youngest is a real home body though.

Our DD has been to Oz three times now, she’s only 21, and I think she’ll go once her degree is done. The only thing holding her back is my terminal illness and I am devastated that’s even a consideration.