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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think dp is being selfish/jealous regarding my friendship with work colleague

5 replies

charliexx · 12/04/2025 17:59

My colleague and I get on really well and we have children similar ages and have become good friends. We have started to meet up outside of work with our children. My dp and I rarely have family days out together because we end up arguing and the day is ruined before it’s even began. Before becoming friends with my colleague I mainly took the children out on my own, and do 99% of parenting solo. He doesn’t do school runs other than the few days a week he has to due to me being at work, doesn’t do appointments, cook or willingly voice he wants to do something unless I suggest it. My whole life is work and being a parent. I have other friends who i see occasionally but our children are different ages so just find myself taking the children out alone and now i have made a new friend with children similar ages to mine and we have the same interests it’s nice because we all have someone to talk to/ interact with when we go out. Anyway, today I have gone out with my friend and while i’m out he has messaged saying he’s not happy with how much time i’m spending with her and does she not have her own family. But if i didn’t go out today, i guarantee he would not have suggested we do something. Outside of work we catch up maybe 2/3 times a month so it’s not like it’s every weekend. Is his ‘annoyance’ valid?

OP posts:
Evaka · 12/04/2025 18:01

Tell him to fuck right off. What an arsehole.

RuffledKestrel · 12/04/2025 18:07

No it's not valid. Tell him if he's feeling like he is missing out on family time then he can organise something for you all to do.

Everystripesays · 12/04/2025 18:08

This sounds like the least of your worries, he sounds awful.

MayaPinion · 12/04/2025 18:10

‘Sorry, darling. I didn’t realise you’d planned a day out for us. Where are we going?’

That aside, he sounds like a lazy selfish controlling arse.

JLou08 · 12/04/2025 20:04

No, his annoyance isn't valid. He sounds awful. If I was you I would start going out more, you may then realise life could be a lot better for you and your DC without him.

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