Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feed DP these beans?

35 replies

Newfun · 11/04/2025 13:09

He's one of those ridiculous people who thinks dates on food are the law.

I'm not slapdash with fresh food, I would't use out of date meat or fish, but I also hate waste and generally live by best before is a guide and if it looks and smells OK it's OK to eat.

He doesn't live here but I offered him beans on toast as a quick meal between outings. The tin I found was dated 2021. Obviously my stock rotation has failed, it's not something I eat often.

He was horrified at the idea so he had something else. I've since bought new beans, but I'm not throwing the old ones out, tinned food literally lasts forever.

They'll get used eventually, either by me or an adult DC, but would it be very unreasonable to just give them to him next time without letting him know they're the old ones?

Obviously if they don't look right once the tin is open, I won't use them, but they will....

OP posts:
Threesmycrowd · 11/04/2025 13:50

mrsm43s · 11/04/2025 13:42

Do you also slip ham in a vegetarian's sandwich and cook a vegan's roast potatoes in lard?

Your DH has said he doesn't want to eat them, so respect that. He gets to choose what he eats and what he doesn't. You don't have the right to disregard his choices for his own body.

TBH I'd just chuck out something 4 years out of date which costs less than 50p to replace. I'm all for a bit of flexibility on use by dates, but four years past they're not going to be at their best.

I'm a vegan and someone once cooked my potatoes in goose fat. After I'd eaten them and complimented the meal she gloated with glee that I'd eaten meat. I was livid.

It was about 30 years ago and we grew apart (not because of the potatoes!) My lasting memory of her is that meal and it isn't an accurate reflection on the friendship at all!!!

Lottie6712 · 11/04/2025 13:51

Tickettothemoon · 11/04/2025 13:19

If you are against waste and are not bothered about the date I would just eat them yourself when you fancy them. I don’t think it’s fair that he’s mentioned he wouldn’t be happy eating them for you to trick him to prove a point..

This!

Glitchymn1 · 11/04/2025 13:55

You enjoy them then! Why would you purposely give them to him knowing he’s said no thanks.

juicylipbalm · 11/04/2025 14:10

Newfun · 11/04/2025 13:13

No, I wouldn't tell him. I might tell him if I ate them and lived, to make the point

What! This is so wrong

ScholesPanda · 11/04/2025 14:53

If you don't want to waste them or eat them could you put them in the bath and sit in them to raise money for red nose day?

Surroundedbyfools · 11/04/2025 14:53

For christs sake just throw the 4 year out of date beans in the bin and move on with ur life

AdoraBell · 11/04/2025 14:56

It wouldn’t bother me if the tins were stored in cool cupboard.

CoastalCalm · 11/04/2025 14:56

Eat them yourself and stop playing games over a tin of beans ffs

autisticbookworm · 12/04/2025 08:51

Threesmycrowd · 11/04/2025 13:50

I'm a vegan and someone once cooked my potatoes in goose fat. After I'd eaten them and complimented the meal she gloated with glee that I'd eaten meat. I was livid.

It was about 30 years ago and we grew apart (not because of the potatoes!) My lasting memory of her is that meal and it isn't an accurate reflection on the friendship at all!!!

That’s a horrid thing to do, being vegan isn’t about things tasting better. Something can taste better with meat but if you choose to not eat animal products then you don’t have it. I would have ended the friendship for that.

FeministUnderTheCatriarchy · 12/04/2025 08:57

If my DH tricked me into eating something I expressly said I didn't want to eat, I would leave him.

It's a violation. You are getting them to consume something under false pretences for no good reason. You're not in a bomb shelter on rations.

You eat the beans, no big deal. But it also isn't a big deal that he doesn't want them.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page