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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Send your email again when I get back

151 replies

FallOfSloths · 10/04/2025 12:32

Aibu to think this isn't good enough as an auto reply?

Medium senior person in work, off until Easter.

Sent her an email, and the auto reply says : 'I'll be back after the Easter bank holidays. I won't be replying to anything during this time, so if you expect a response then resend your email when I am back.'

For info, she's just on a 2 week holiday, not very long term absence like sick leave or parental leave etc. My email is about something that needs her input, so I can't ask one of her team.

AIBU to think this is a bit bloody cheeky? I don't need an answer straight away, but would expect to send the email now and get it answered after she returns. I don't really have the time or headspace to diarise when she's in work so I can email her then. Imagine if everyone did this! Surely the whole point of email is to send when it's convenient and the person doesn't have to reply instantly?

OP posts:
nomas · 10/04/2025 14:10

goldierocks · 10/04/2025 12:51

Hi @FallOfSloths - do you use Outlook? Even if not, I haven't yet come across an email system where you can't use an inbuilt feature to send emails at a future point in time.
With Outlook, before you click on Send, find the do not send before feature. Enter the date and time she returns, click Send. Your email will be sent automatically at her return date (and time, if you put one in. Else 00.01) without another thought or action required from you.
It's the new normal, but you can use the email system to your advantage.

Does that also work if your laptop is shut down?

nomas · 10/04/2025 14:10

fuckingangrybirdbrows · 10/04/2025 14:09

Her senior does not sound anything like my senior.

edit: unless she's super mega senior in which case she can get away with this ridiculous diva behaviour

Edited

I think senior has lost all meaning now.

Not sure if we’re taking about middle management or senior management.

fuckingangrybirdbrows · 10/04/2025 14:13

nomas · 10/04/2025 14:10

I think senior has lost all meaning now.

Not sure if we’re taking about middle management or senior management.

Maybe it has. To me it means the SMT, business owners or MDs/CEOs/CFOs.

StringersBell · 10/04/2025 14:13

I cant see the benefit in doing this. Lots of emails are just looping me into things - so not asking me for something specifically, but keeping me informed of progress on something that could impact me/my team. And as someone else pointed out, is it really better to come back to an empty inbox but then have all those emails then land on my first day back? I guess a few may not end up being sent if they’re dealt with by someone else in my absence but personally I’d rather block out the time myself to clear. I always go through and just triage quickly anyway, flag anything adding for response, highlight others to come back to later as more for knowledge, delete the crap.

100percenthagitude · 10/04/2025 14:15

Perfectly reasonable out of office. I always use it on periods where OOO for more than a week. Prevents everyone who plays email ping pong (you know the ones: "I'll throw an email and that's my job done") from wasting my time.

Much easier for you to make a diary note to contact her on the day you're back, @FallOfSloths . You could even schedule it.

While I'm on a whinge, 80% of emails or more could be quick phone convos or more, too.

nomas · 10/04/2025 14:16

fuckingangrybirdbrows · 10/04/2025 14:13

Maybe it has. To me it means the SMT, business owners or MDs/CEOs/CFOs.

Me too!

PlanetJanette · 10/04/2025 14:16

FallOfSloths · 10/04/2025 13:37

Go through her emails when she returns like everyone else? This system is great for her but means lots of extra work for everyone else.

It actually doesn't mean 'lots' of extra work for everyone else.

It will take you an extra five seconds to copy and paste your email into a new email and schedule it to send on her return. That is not a 'lot of extra work'.

By contrast, if she's like me and gets somewhere between 100 and 200 emails a day, trawling through thousands of emails on return is a massively unproductive use of her time.

Also, what you describe is not what everybody else does. Lots of people adopt this approach, and it is a perfectly sensible approach to improving productivity.

fuckingangrybirdbrows · 10/04/2025 14:16

Surely everyone has their emails on their phone and they monitor, delete and reply if appropriate while they're away?

Ddakji · 10/04/2025 14:17

That is a very rude OOO. Is that going to external people or just internal? I think I’d get into a lot of trouble if I had that as my OOO for either, but especially for external people.

Also poor form to not have a named contact instead.

Surprised that so many people here think it’s all good.

nomas · 10/04/2025 14:18

PlanetJanette · 10/04/2025 14:16

It actually doesn't mean 'lots' of extra work for everyone else.

It will take you an extra five seconds to copy and paste your email into a new email and schedule it to send on her return. That is not a 'lot of extra work'.

By contrast, if she's like me and gets somewhere between 100 and 200 emails a day, trawling through thousands of emails on return is a massively unproductive use of her time.

Also, what you describe is not what everybody else does. Lots of people adopt this approach, and it is a perfectly sensible approach to improving productivity.

Why does she need to copy and paste it? I’d forward it to her again with a quick ‘chasing this up, could you back to me this week.’

purplecorkheart · 10/04/2025 14:18

I think this is becoming more and more common. Many of the emails that she gets will have been resolved by the time she gets back so she is being more efficient that wading through lots of emails about things that have already been resolved.

I would imagine that most people who receive that reply resend the email immediate but set the date and time that they want it to be delivered so they equally do not have to remember to send it when she is back.

Psychologymam · 10/04/2025 14:18

It’s standard practice in a lot of places - makes sense, if it’s important and you still need her, you’ll resend email, if it’s urgent you’ll find someone else in the meantime to discuss and if it’s not important you will do without! Spending the day sifting through emails and seeing what to respond to and answering queries already sorted out is a waste of time.

PlanetJanette · 10/04/2025 14:19

100percenthagitude · 10/04/2025 14:15

Perfectly reasonable out of office. I always use it on periods where OOO for more than a week. Prevents everyone who plays email ping pong (you know the ones: "I'll throw an email and that's my job done") from wasting my time.

Much easier for you to make a diary note to contact her on the day you're back, @FallOfSloths . You could even schedule it.

While I'm on a whinge, 80% of emails or more could be quick phone convos or more, too.

This. The way we communicate in a professional context is generally massively unproductive. Sending emails to clogged inboxes when a quick message or call would be simpler.

That is precisely why people seek tools to avoid being swamped by emails, like this.

nomas · 10/04/2025 14:19

fuckingangrybirdbrows · 10/04/2025 14:16

Surely everyone has their emails on their phone and they monitor, delete and reply if appropriate while they're away?

I don’t think everyone does. Senior management often do but not everyone.

Brefugee · 10/04/2025 14:19

yeah, i think since the advent of email, it has got out of control and many people/workplaces are realising this.

way easier just to start tabula rasa when you come back.

fuckingangrybirdbrows · 10/04/2025 14:20

Ddakji · 10/04/2025 14:17

That is a very rude OOO. Is that going to external people or just internal? I think I’d get into a lot of trouble if I had that as my OOO for either, but especially for external people.

Also poor form to not have a named contact instead.

Surprised that so many people here think it’s all good.

Agree.

OOO should say something like:

Thank you for your email. I'm currently on leave until the X of X, back in the office 8am on X of X.

Please contact This Person if you need something urgently, otherwise I will respond to your email on my return.

Many kind regards, Me

fuckingangrybirdbrows · 10/04/2025 14:21

nomas · 10/04/2025 14:19

I don’t think everyone does. Senior management often do but not everyone.

Then the solution is the first half of their day when they return is inbox management. Not rude OOO

Intheband · 10/04/2025 14:22

My dad did this 25+ years ago it’s not a new thing….

I work in a school so don’t deal with this nonsense.

Wishimaywishimight · 10/04/2025 14:22

Sounds very sensible to me and I have seen it often.

Why can't you just stick a 'reminder' in your Outlook tasks (or whatever diary system you use) to email her after her return?

yugflalska · 10/04/2025 14:23

I’m with you OP. I don’t expect people to respond on holiday, but the magical thing about emails is that they patiently wait there until your return. I presume no one blocks up their letter box and tells Royal Mail not to post anything when you’re on holiday. Just deal with it when you get back. During holiday seasons like this it would be a pain in the arse to have to constantly make notes to remind yourself to resend emails after certain dates, especially when contending with your own leave period.

Kbroughton · 10/04/2025 14:23

I think this is genius and not something we do in the public sector enough. You come back to thousands of emails, most of them nonsense or have already been dealt with but you dont know that. I think its a really good approach. OP it sounds like you are one who sends an email and expects it then be the other persons problem rather than a task you need to own. Also for the person that says people monitor their emails when they are away - they shouldnt. Your leave is meant to be a time when you get headspace from work meaning that you have a proper rest. If you are looking at emails, even if you delete them, you are still in a work space. When I am on 'proper' leave, ie a week or more, I delete my email app from my phone. I have a very high pressured job and need to break sometimes - and I think that role models good leadership behaviour. If i respond my team think they should too.

PlanetJanette · 10/04/2025 14:23

ThisFluentBiscuit · 10/04/2025 14:02

If I deleted everything on my return, I'd potentially miss quite a lot of important information. Not all emails are asking you to do something or asking for an answer. Some contain updates about projects or procedures that you really need to know. I can only think that people who are able to handle holiday emails like this have a job where important business isn't done via email.

Alternatively, you can still skim your emails on return. But by telling people that they should not expect their email to be actioned unless it is sent when you come back, you can get away with doing a very cursory skim and then mass deletion or archiving, knowing that anything requiring action will come back in.

fuckingangrybirdbrows · 10/04/2025 14:24

Kbroughton · 10/04/2025 14:23

I think this is genius and not something we do in the public sector enough. You come back to thousands of emails, most of them nonsense or have already been dealt with but you dont know that. I think its a really good approach. OP it sounds like you are one who sends an email and expects it then be the other persons problem rather than a task you need to own. Also for the person that says people monitor their emails when they are away - they shouldnt. Your leave is meant to be a time when you get headspace from work meaning that you have a proper rest. If you are looking at emails, even if you delete them, you are still in a work space. When I am on 'proper' leave, ie a week or more, I delete my email app from my phone. I have a very high pressured job and need to break sometimes - and I think that role models good leadership behaviour. If i respond my team think they should too.

When you run your own business you don't get the luxury of rest!

standtherebicycle · 10/04/2025 14:26

You can just forward the same email and use 'scheduled send' to resend it at 9 am on the date she comes back - it's not that mush effort and you can forget all about it - she'll get it when she gets back. There's a little downward arrow next to the send button that lets you pick a time/date on mine.

Ddakji · 10/04/2025 14:27

fuckingangrybirdbrows · 10/04/2025 14:16

Surely everyone has their emails on their phone and they monitor, delete and reply if appropriate while they're away?

Absolutely not! My phone is private so nothing to do with work and when I’m on holiday from work I’m not working! That’s such an awful attitude to have.