To think you don’t get out of paying the bill because you don’t drink?

[ThatHardyWaspAgain]

I’m sure this has been done many times before by people in similar scenarios.

I went out for a bit of lunch with two friend’s and one of them brought another friend along that I’ve never met but was nice enough.

However, when it came to the bill, she said ‘’Can we please calculate it all with the alcohol you’ve had separately paid for? Because I only had classical cokes’’

So, we did as she asked. Added up everything but removed the drinks. So 3 of us paid for our drinks in a split, and then did another split for the rest with her and her food and classical colas.

The annoying bit is, she had 3 of them. And they weren’t really much different in price to most of our alcohol.

We all had the same roast and mango cheesecake.

I wouldn’t mind but she kept insisting we all had a dessert so she didn’t feel alone in having one. We’re adults after all but it is a bit annoying

Separate thread to come to see if I would be U to tell my friend not to bring her along again

She also didn’t tip.

Mental image of the classical cokes performing swan lake on the table.

the absolute basic "level of service" should still be polite, correct (as in people get exactly what they ordered), and fast (within the extent of the server's control).

tbh as long as servers meet that, I don't really care if they then go "above and beyond" in enthusiastic chatting or being really friendly - I'm eating out with my actual friends, I don't need a waiter to pretend to like me for extra money, I just need them to get the correct food from the kitchen to my table , i.e. their literal job.

If you can't even meet that minimum level then you shouldn't be doing the job.

apart from anything else, if you think people need to tip well to get good service, how does that even work logically given you don't tip until after you've already received the service? Are you somehow psychically able to sense who will be a good tipper and treat them accordingly?

and how about in jobs where they don't get tips but still work for minimum wage? Or do you just accept that shop staff, HCA's, TA's, etc don't need to meet the bare minimum standard of professionalism because they aren't getting anything extra out of it?

The job is worth what you agreed to do it for. That's between you and your employer, not the customer. There is a limit to what you can do to obtain more money but an expectation of tipping isn't it now that NMW has levelled the playing field.

Your attitude is why there is massive entitlement across the serving staff in the hospitality industry; not all, but very many. Care and attention is the bare minimum.

Everything that latetothefishing has said covers it.

Nail on the head.

What's my attitude?

If i don't drink then the drinks get done separately or we split the food then work out the drinks. I often drive so don't end up drinking.

What "extra care and attention" requires a tip though?

Yes, I've had this with a group I'd been away with a couple of times. I was often paying double the cost of what I'd had. I was really sick of it.

Once I raised it of course, the atmosphere changed and after that trip I never heard from them again.

It's a shame that some people expect to get away with this shit. It's always the ones taking the piss that cause the atmosphere when they get called out. It's not fair and they know it. I couldn't do that.

Its a good job you dont have to hang out with them anymore then

Have alot of sympathy with this woman. I hate splitting the bill, especially if I haven’t agreed to do so before the meal. Also hate paying for other people’s alcohol. As for tipping - I used to work as a waitress where I wasn’t given a share of the tips so, no, I don’t tip if I can help it.
Also think it’s very bad of restaurants to add an “optional service charge” to bills in an attempt to guilt trip people into paying more.
As you can probably tell I find eating out somewhat problematic these days and am doing it less and less.

I don’t know why you are getting a pile on. She’s a Cheeky Fucker. Also tipping isn’t a great system but it’s the one we’ve got…so either start a national campaign for a fair wage, or get your wallet out.

I don't drink alcohol. I refuse to pay towards other people alcohol.

I'm more interested in the fact that you were badgered into having. a desert when you didn't want one.
Couldn't you have said no ?

But she didn't pay towards the alcohol...the point is she then didn't pay towards what she actually did drink - which was almost as much as the alcohol. Fine if you just drinking tap water or one soft drink....

She should have taken her food and drinks off and paid seperatately for those. You should have spoken up and suggested that at the time. I get it can be difficult not to be peer pressured into bill splitting, but once this woman had spoken up then its really on the rest of you to chip in if you don't think her suggestion is fair to you.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣brilliant!

and we would pay for our own items if not paying for the whole meal

I went out for a meal with a group where a guy who never buys anyone a drink ordered a bucket of beer - 6 bottles in a bucket of ice - he started handing them out to friends who always buy him drinks. My friend who received one was like “see he’s not tight, he’s not a parasite, he is getting us back now” - then the bill came and he was like “oh and you five all had a beer so that’s x amount extra” - the beer bucket was buy five get one free, he told the other five people to add the price of a beer onto their meal so his was free lol. Absolute parasite. That is what this person reminds me of - she should pay for her soft drinks!

In group settings I usually do drinks separate unless we’re sharing wine or it’s a small group of close friends and drinking relatively similar stuff. I don’t like to feel like I have to order a beer or something comparable to everyone else, if I want a more expensive drink I get it and pay for it.

In this sort of situation the best way to go is for everyone to pay for what they had on their own separate bill. If the restaurant can't cope with individual bills then the next best way is for everyone to contribute the right amount when the bill comes, based on a roughly adding up what they had (and adding a contribution for any service charge/tip).

It can also help if drinks are handled separately: if possible don't order them to the table, buy them individually at the bar instead.

There's no way I believe that 3 people's alcohol bill came to £12 in a place that sells roasts and mango cheesecake.

I read it as £12 each for alcohol. It's not clear though.

💯

It does cheese me off if I had one glass of wine at £7, but the person who had a starter and pudding (when I didn’t) and two soft drinks at £4 each piously announces that they should pay less because they weren’t drinking .

You're absolutely right - either split the bill or everyone pay for exactly what they had.

She is a CF.

If it was a simple lunch or dinner with only a couple of glasses of wine or whatever I am not going to get into a twist if we split the bill equally. I don't drink very much these days and I do get annoyed if some long pub lunch with a large group of people ends up ploughing through several bottles of decent wine with the expectation that non drinkers chip in for a bill where the alcohol far exceeds the cost of food. To me it is just rude. From my experience it is usually always down to couple of heavy drinking booze hounds wanting a free ride at everyone else’s expense.

All this angst for 2 quid? Why was it even a question?