Aibu to spend money on alcohol when we haven't had a family holiday for two years?

[Littlebittiredoflife]

I'll start by saying, I drink once a week maximum- more likely a couple of times a month, so I don't for one second think my alcohol spends would cover anywhere near a whole holiday. Alcohol is spent from grocery budget for ease of recording so I don't know how much I actually spend.

However I was looking at a bottle of spirits costing around £20 and thinking I could put the £20 towards saving for a holiday instead of the alcohol. So one day in 5-10 years years we might have enough to go away if I spend zero money on alcohol. But where do I draw the line? Do I never buy an ice cream at the park for us, not buy a new dress even though mine have holes in, spend the evenings in darkness to save on electric? For a once a year thing that's over in a week? If you don't have a holiday do you cut out all other discretionary spends? I know I am lucky to have money left to save but outgoings have increased dramatically so I'm having to make tougher choices than a few years ago and I'm a bit lost on how much to sacrifice for a holiday!

Personally I would rather have small treats at the moment or maybe try and save to have a weekend away.

Work out your essentials costs, see how much you have left over, then split that so a third is for day to day spending, a third is saved for christmas/birthdays/bigger trips like a theme park and a third is put aside towards a holiday at some point in the future.

I think "look after the pennies and the pounds look after themselves" is absolutely true, but I'm not sure making that much sacrifice for a holiday is worthwhile. IME a holiday that's "cost" that much, in terms of going without, can't live up to expectations and can only disappoint. It's an awful lot of pressure on 1/2 weeks and the people you travel with.

Your kids won’t thank you for missing little treats for years to have a holiday in 5 to 10 years. I would prioritise putting any little bits of saving to have small treats as you go along. Have a “ holiday” every year. Look for all the free events that are going on in your area use any small bits of money for moderate travel costs to get to the free stuff.ice creams in our local park are getting so pricy you could buy a whole box of ice lollies for your freezer at home for the price of 1 ice cream so do that instead.
Holiday at home in the school holidays, act like you are staying in your city/ town/village on holiday, have a lie in get some treat things in for breakfast make a packed lunch and go out for the day go to any FREE museums / art galleries most of them put on children’s activities in the holidays, organised sports camps usually cost a fortune but a couple of our local churches put on children’s clubs for 3 hrs a day for a fortnight for £1.50 a session and the kids get a snack as well. ( you don’t have to be religious) a local community centre does similar. Go to the beach / river / woods whatever is near you even a different play park to the one you normally visit. If you have a garden have a silly sports day walking backwards race, hopping race blindfold long jump the more stupid the better. Paddling pool or just a big tub of water. Terrible weather build a fort in the living room, let them invite a friend over, board game afternoons, crafty stuff, baking then eating the results, making home made pizzas etc etc

I'd have some small treats and maybe save for a weekend away. We are going to Haven for a long weekend in term time, using an inset day, for £300. Some weekends are even less than that. I'd never forgo all treats for years to save just for 1 big holiday every 5 years.

Thank you for this..this is exactly what we do. I'm just sad we haven't made it on a holiday and that my children will have no physical understanding of the wider world (of course can watch documentaries etc any other ideas?)

Budget has been created but no holiday. So trying to make budget from holiday from other budgets. I think I will forgo the alcohol that is not for them at all!

You don’t have to martyr yourself for your kids. It’s ok to give yourself little treats as well as everyone else. You’re not a big drinker by the sound of it so just buy your occasional bottle of booze and save some pounds where you can. Life can be tough without removing the little joys.

Have you looked at sun holidays? I know someone who’s just had 4 nights in a caravan for less than £100 in the Easter holidays. A perfectly good holiday! Yes there’s extras to pay for but take food and spend a couple of days doing free activities (swimming was free for example). A holiday doesn’t have to cost thousands and kids will love a few days in a caravan on the coast!

Enjoy your drink don't make your life anymore miserable then it needs to be

I think you should look at other areas not just no alcohol. Smaller more economical car for example, if that applies.

When DH and I stopped drinking alcohol we were spending circa £13 a day. Not including pub visits and drinking in restauarnts.

That is about £5 k a year.

THAT is a family holiday. Not drinking as modestly as you do OP.

I'd be looking at other ways you might be wasting money.

I’d be meeting this idea half way and saving for a weekend away somewhere.
Anywhere away from your home is a holiday in my book, and it doesn’t need to be all singing and dancing to get the benefit.
I'd buy the booze half the time, treats half the time (or cheaper options like buying a box of ice lollies from Sainsburys when I’m out rather than £20 on ice creams from the van).

I think you will be miserable if you give up things you enjoy for the sake of a holiday. It's not like you're blowing all your money in the pub every day.

Everyone's different, but making the best of the time at home is the most important thing for me. For some people a holiday is what makes the drudgery of the year worth it. Only you know where to strike a good balance for you.

I know this isn’t what you asked but carefully tracking every pound helped me to save for cheap holidays. im talking two full days out with a night in a cheap hotel or a haven holiday if you have more.

Okay wider world ideas- depends a little on the age of the children but some suggestions might be,
They probably have a globe in school or you can look at one online if you have a laptop to see where countries are positioned, google earth for older kids maybe
We don’t live in a particularly multicultural city but there are lots of opportunities to share in different cultural experiences.
One of my local churches who puts on a cheap summer club is a primarily Nigerian church ( don’t need to be Nigerian or have any faith to attend) lots of usual kids activities with some specific cultural ones added in.
We have a Confusious Centre who have done calligraphy classes for local kids in the past.
one of our local mosques has family events aimed at the wider community, offers fabulous food.
we have a few shops selling Polish goods a Hungarian shop a Chinese an African and an Asian supermarket all very welcoming for folk to go in and look at their range of goods and see what “different” sort of foods they might have on the shelves and treat yourself to something delicious.
Otherwise get yourself to Lidl or Aldi and look at their amazing range of European food plan a different “day” each month and buy some different foods and have a French day, a German Day a Greek day etc
Documentaries are good but also go to the library get age appropriate books out about different cultures, different religions, different countries share the stories.
we have an annual Holi festival which is amazing.
One of our free entry museums is a Natural History Museum ( no not the big London one) lots of maps up showing where the animals came from, which ones are now extinct due to deforestation and other pressures on their habitat, it has different trails through it with child friendly questions like find 5 animals that live in deserts.
Talk about other countries eg if it’s raining outside talk about how in some other countries it can rain for weeks at a time, some other places get no rain at all. If you are outside talk about how amazing it is that probably another child in their own country is looking up at the same sun feeling it’s warmth, go out when it’s dark look up at the stars and talk about how when it’s dark here it’s daylight in other parts of the world and they may see some of the same stars but also some different one. If you have a nature reserve nearby got and see some of the migratory birds and talk about where they have flown from. Somany opportunities in everyday life easy for younger children, for older children let them read news stories from around the world ( my need to be filtered for age appropriateness.

I prefer to live well day by day. Nice sausages from
the butcher, cakes in a cafe once a week, a new dress for a wedding I’ve got coming up, taking the kids to Alton towers in the summer. Im not very motivated by one week abroad

If it really would take 5-10 years to save for a holiday by forgoing small joys then forget it. I do think children benefit from travel, though, but you can just do long weekends rather than 1-2 week trips. Take them to Paris or Amsterdam on the Eurostar and stay in a hostel. You’ll have a great time.

If I had to choose, I’d pick the small joys over a holiday. But if there’s a way to do both (ie finding ways to holiday cheaply…) then I would recommend it. No amount of coffee & cake in a cafe or buying nicer meat from the butchers replaces getting away from day-to-day life to somewhere new for me. Especially if it’s to escape the winter for somewhere warm. The idea of getting through 52 weeks with no change of scenery is so depressing. I feel for those who have no choice.

I don't think you should be going without day to day in order to go on holiday. Its better to make your every day life good and enjoyable.

I prioritise holidays but what I sacrifice are meals out and a new ( to me) car. I wouldn't sacrifice everything enjoyable in my life.

It rained every single day on a beach holiday I had last year. Holiday ruined, total waste of money.

No don't give up your very moderate and well deserved treats OP. You sound like a lovely mum, you really do. I wonder if you can scrimp together some camping weekend or a term time hol or something by being frugal somewhere else? Another idea is a simple daytrip to the beach (if possible for you) with a picnic and cheap buckets and spades, our nearest beach is 2 hours away. How old are your DC?

They are 7 and 11. Thank you there were some lovely comments. I bought the bottle but haven't even opened it yet! I am sure we will have friends over in the summer and it will be nice to be able to offer them a cocktail. We will find a cheap holiday next year but don't feel like it's possible this year. We will visit and stay with family though and definitely have day trip or two during our annual leave/school holidays. Thank you for the ideas on culture, that was super comprehensive!